#geeleeyan

[arcticjilliandreams]

1 WEEK BEFORE I SEE ALEX DANCE LIVE

Well at least I have that to look forward to. Otherwise I won't have anything exciting lined up. (oh wait I remember I'll also be meeting @finnicksghost when she comes to the south next weekend)

I've got lots of trauma dumping to do but I don't want to as I'm still in a shitty mood. But, I did come up with another way to put myself in the history section. (credits to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiRAFPT2Ebg&ab_channel=CasualGeographic for this creative line)

Travel to Thailand with a stranger and then idiot me would forget not to carry anyone's baggage when asked and that baggage had a shit ton of illegal drugs and I'll be put in jail because of it (of course the Philippine's vlogger won't do anything also why do I even expect anything in the 1st place as he is an idiot) and I would have the death sentence due to Thailand's harsh punishment for this kind of crime. I need to edit my sentence's but who the fuck cares.

Also, I have another canker sore under my gums and it fucking hurts when I slide my tongue to where it is.

Tapos bwiset bakit daw ayaw ko na lang mag stay dito sa bahay at mag wfh. Gusto niyo ba talaga mawalan na ko ganang mabuhay? Well nagiging 60/50 na actually, I'm enjoying to drink again. But I'm trying not to over do it or else another visit to my neurologist.

[arcticjilliandreams]

Akala mo makakatulog ka na mahimbing at mahaba? JOKE LANG, HERE'S A BAD DREAM.

2 am and again wide awake. I don't know why I was in an office for the city (heck I don't even have experience as a personal assistant) but I was being held hostage by a boss who wouldn't let me go home. As much as I don't want to admit that my father was there, fortunately he was the one who helped me escape. The boss went crazy when I left, had to defend ourselves with a broken plate or whatever it was I had in my hand.

[arcticjilliandreams]

February 3, 2023

When I discovered Arctic Monkeys released The Car a few months ago (or on January because that was one freaking long month) I thought I wouldn't be enjoying it compared to TBHC (well I think I can enjoy it now come to think of it) but things change and situations are not the same as it was last year or last month. Like for example Paramore and Fall Out Boy released new albums and songs. Those really tug at my emotions and I can absolutely relate to the songs.

[arcticjilliandreams]

February 2, 2023

Yesterday I was watching White Palace (simping on Susan Sarandon & James Spader) and I read a review somewhere that it was a forgettable version of The Graduate. I can't agree just yet because I haven't watched TG yet. It got me thinking, maybe I should date a 40 year old since I'm turning 30 in 6 months anyway lol.

EDIT: Or Idk Jillian maybe enjoy being single for once and grow the f up

Let me first find a job so I don't go crazy like 4 years ago. We don't want that no sir.

Trabaho ko na lang ata mag block spam accounts dito eh sa totoo lang.

[arcticjilliandreams]

(Me sleeping without melatonin): My dogs: ha you thought you can get away sleeping uninterrupted

Yesterday the parentals and I were talking about my cousin who is already orphaned. She only has her half brother but he lives with his wife and son somewhere else. Her older sister died as a kid due to dengue, I think we were closer in age if she was alive today. (Ayaw ko na mag english sa part na to kasi mas magandang version kung tagalog lol) Yung isa sinabi buti walang inferiority complex, sumagot naman ako (without pausing to think I might add) kung wala naman natanggap na trauma. They didn't say a peep.

I don't want to brag and say because I was right kaya hindi sila nakasagot, pero paano nga naman magkaka trauma kung maaga nawala? Most of my uncle's life was spent somewhere else when she was in college. She was very young to even have bad memories from her sister. My aunt was a very caring person (and great cook too I might add, her baked mac was to die for!)

EDIT: I don't know about the half brother because I have no idea how he is like.

So I don't know if I have the right to claim that my answer was correct.

[arcticjilliandreams]

The amount of spam accounts that followed me is annoying and really frustrating. So it has been more than a week since my dog bit me, a day before that a cousin of a friend was found dead. At first it was thought to have been a suicide but its still under investigation. ANYWAY, earlier this morning the parentals went grocery shopping and unfortunately the senior citizen bought a lot of chicken not asking if we have any in the freezer (we have a ton btw 🙄). When I told him I didn't put the chicken in the freezer so it can be cooked immediately, you want to know what he did? He shouted at me like it was my fault. I thought I could shrug it off but here I am writing about it late at night. This is one of the instances I want to ask about our neurologist but alas I might have a talking to when we get home. Hopefully I can pass it off to the other parental unit to do the task.

Ok thats enough, I need for the melatonin to take effect. I haven't taken it for 5 days so far my sleeping sched starts at 12 am and I wake up at 8 ish or 9 ish 😂

[arcticjilliandreams]

January 20, 2023

I'm becoming too dependent on Sleepasil again. Also, I just got bit by my dog. Of course we have another trauma to add to the list. Instead of sympathizing with me, I'm to blame because I interfered with the quarrel outside or I should have something to hit the dogs with. Sorry I was just listening to what the dog experts were saying. "Hindi naman mag papatayan yan eh." Dexter: wow sorry ha hindi pa pala ako papatayin mga kasama kong aso sa itchura at iyak ko na yun (If only my dog could speak.) I have no reason to go to RITM, I'll just let rabies take effect if there ever is (Fortunately all of them have been given shots and I was also given one before).

Masakit lang left hand ko and visibly upset.

[arcticjilliandreams]

"I'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck."

(Arctic Monkeys - 505)

So I just finished watching Me Before You. Good to know that my suicidal tendencies are still there and my good days are fleeting. I just sometimes wonder if Will was better off signing a DNR instead of having assisted suicide.

EDIT: I keep getting followed by spam accounts seriously what the heck.