#genderrolessuck

[br-o-ken-poetry]

Just serving some trans girl magic from today <3 My mirror may be dusty but it’s cool because I’m extra and this makes it look like a polaroid. So happy I can share stuff like this nowadays, and not just in secret, on tumblr. TYSM xox

[br-o-ken-poetry]

I've been wondering wether or not a male and female can be friends. I already know that a guy and girl can be close with each other without falling for each other, so that's definitely not the reason I have doubts about male-female friendships. So it's common knowledge that friendship is between two equals, and no one is more dominant than the other right? So can a males and females be friends and connect with each other like equals, the way the interact with their friends of the same gender?

I think they can but that they often just don’t. There are a lot of learned behaviours from both genders, especially around how to behave when with people of the other gender. And that often will come out in the way they talk to each other in a way it won’t when talking to someone of the same gender. Also, guys and girls believe inherently that they’re a lot more different than they actually are - mainly because of socially constructed gender roles that change appearance (I’m talking long hair/short hair, trousers/dresses, etc etc). If we didn’t have these social barriers that quite physically label a person as “a different gender” I suspect there would be less of a bridge to cross and men and women would connect much easier. That said, sexuality damages friendship too I think - it’s why, for example, girls and gay men can get along in a way very different from girls and straight men - they know there’s always a chance of sexual intimacy between them which changes how they are with that person. Doesn’t happen with a gay man of course because they know for sure the man is not interested! Those are just my opinions… But yes. They can be, and are, but not as often as they could or should be because of The Gender Problem ™ :’)

[br-o-ken-poetry]

I’m sick of the terf argument that trans women aren’t real women because they have “experienced male privilege”. No, they have not. And no, this is not just because of the internal feelings - I understand “privilege” may not be affected by how a person feels inside. But what do these people think trans women are? Trans woman are not like men. They do not act like men. They do not behave in the male way necessary to receiving any of the advantages men are thought to receive in this society, because they are usually effeminate, quiet, and all the other things that put a man at the bottom of the social order. Trans women didn’t just wake up one morning in the middle of a comfortable life as a “privileged” man and decide to become a woman, they have suffered for a long, long time because of the way they are, and those who suggest they have somehow benefited from any sort of privilege... It just shows an entire new level of ignorance and stupidity. 

[br-o-ken-poetry]

so this cis boy on kik says to me “you’re really pretty but without so much makeup on I can kinda tell you’re a man :/ sorry to be the one to break this to you”

bruh

DO YOU THINK I DON’T KNOW THIS FGS

DO YOU THINK I DON’T DOUBT AND HATE MYSELF FOR IT DAILY

DO YOU THINK IT’S A CHOICE, HOW YOUR FACE IS

AND DO YOU REALLY, REALLY THINK

YOU ARE THE FIRST PERSON TO THINK OR SAY THIS...?

it’s just basic respect, you know? don’t tell trans women they “look kinda like a dude” and don’t tell trans men they “look kinda like a girl”... I wouldn’t have thought it would be hard to realise that saying this might hurt their feelings, or damage their confidence, which in case you don’t know, ISN’T USUALLY VERY GREAT TO BEGIN WITH...

sorry for the rant but I’ve just had this guy’s words in my head all day and it’s just so dumb yet somehow still really got to me :(

[br-o-ken-poetry]

Hey guys so guess who didn't wake up until 3pm today (me) but like nobody even noticed bc no one cares about me so I lay in bed until 7pm and the only people who care about me at all are trans fetishists online so like why am I even alive tbh

[br-o-ken-poetry]

I need help badly. I wish to be a man and i began pretending to be one online but then i met someone and we fell in love and they still dont know who i am two yrs later. I need to tell them. Ive hated myself every day for doing this to them but ive never worked up the guts to tell them bc im afraid of how theyll take it. Idc what happens to be. She can call the police, kill me, anything. I deserve it but i font want her to give up on her life. She says im the only thing she looks forward to cnt.

Looks forward to abt life and i dont want her to end hers. She has so much potential and future and i love her so much. She needs to know the truth and im scared that knowing the truth will kill her. However im also more scared that if i just leave her she’ll be wondering why and end her life. Shes told me before she wouldnt ever move on and idk what to do. I love her and want the best for her but ive hurt hwr and put her in this position. Im sorry for the rant i needed to let it out

Hey there. Oh dear, what a messy situation… The two main problems with telling the truth is that A) she’s evidently very emotionally fragile and B) two years is a long time to have carried on with the lie. However, despite those things, you just have to tell her, and sooner rather than later. Then she can decide what she wants to do and figure out how she feels.

I think explaining to her that you are a trans man, and being honest with her about the situation, how you got into this position in the first place etc, may well do be doing yourself a favour. Hopefully she will understand sort of why you did it, and that can help her work out what you two can do. But you just cannot carry on without telling her the truth - or it will grow and grow and grow.

Story time: I was in a similar position recently (gender swapped). I met a guy on an online game I played to distract myself from real life and because I want to be a girl I played as a girl and ofc did not mention any of the details anywhere bc I didn’t expect to get close to anyone. But me and this guy became really close and we really were good friends - and as time went on I realised more and more that I suspected he had feelings for me (or the cis girl he thought I was). I wanted to act back on his feelings, tbh, but I knew it wouldn’t be right, playing with his heart like that, so I told him the truth. We’d known each other a good six months or so, even exchanged selfies! So it wasn’t what he was expecting to hear. But the result was surprising. He said he still had feelings for me and it had just made him curious. He questioned his sexuality a little bit and he asked a lot of questions (which I answered, bc I owed it to him), but he basically got over it. Now, our relationship isn’t exactly the same, but he accepts me, and we are still friends. He didn’t freak out because he knew me, really well, and the person he’d talked to those six months was still the same, even if I didn’t have all the parts he thought I did :P

What I’m saying is that if she really loves you, you may get her forgiveness. I cannot say at all how it might change your relationship - I’d have to cross my fingers and hope for the best, that she’ll accept you, remain friends, etc. But if you know someone for 2 years, you must know each other well. Telling her this, well, it’ll let her know you better.

Despite all or any of this, you just have to tell her. Don’t carry on with it, because there reaches a point it’s really not fair on the other person, no matter what your own feelings, and I think you’re already quite a long way past that.

Feel free to keep my updated :’) As someone who understands how you’d get into this position in the first place, I am rooting for you xx

[universeisinmyhead]

gender roles are dumb and i'm done dealing with them byyyee ✌🏼️🌈😁 #tumblr #genderequality #equality #genderrolesaredead #genderrolessuck #tumblrpost

[br-o-ken-poetry]

On the day I was born, my mum got sent a card from a traditional old relative that said ‘wasn’t it clever of you, to have a boy first’.

I wish I was joking.

When I heard that for the first time, I just laughed. Now that things with, well, ‘being a boy’ are a little different, it just confuses me. Because can you imagine it being that important? Caring so much about ‘continuing the family name’ and ‘carrying on the family line’?

I sure can’t. I’ve never felt attached to my name. I’m not sure if I’ll ever have kids, and since I don’t intend to live as a Man™ anyway (as you’re all probably sick of hearing by now!) she’s in for a bitter disappointment.

But it really made me think, remembering what she wrote. If it isn’t solid, concrete proof of the over-importance of gender in our society, then I don’t know what is. Because people drowned baby girls in China during the one child policy because girls ‘can’t’ continue the family name. What did they die for? A name. A stupid word. A label.

Doesn’t that make you angry? Doesn’t that tell you that the world desperately needs changing?

Furthermore, I shouldn’t have these expectations placed on me. It’s just not right - not for anyone. So sorry, Great-Great Aunt Barbara. You’re in for a bit of a shock. Because I am SO not what you wanted.

And I couldn’t be more happy about it.