While I’m waiting for H.I.M. to be approved, I’ve still got generators on the brain and I whipped up a political scandal generator.
Evidence points to Bibi and his bodyguards personally stuffing ballots in Hoboken, leaving a trail of corpses in his wake as they made sure not to leave any witnesses. When question by police, Bibi confessed, "Putin called me a cyka and said I wouldn't do it."
"word on the street is Reince Priebus is pumping the Beanie Baby market so he can unload his stash and make out like a bandit" (note: Beanie Baby market is currently bearish)
Gilbert Gottfried comes out in favor of fracking for no apparent reason. When pressed, he points to his degree in petroleum engineering and says it only makes sense. "I've gotta get some use outta my degree, considering how much I spent on it. Isn't a guy allowed to make a living?" (note: the ink on his diploma is still wet)
Bill Nye (and the rest of Planetary Society) conspiring with Boeing, Lockmart, and Chrysler to push the false moon landing narrative, as a distraction from the Vietnam War also having been a hoax.