Oooo for the prompt requests, I've just finished season 2, so maybe Kanan coming back and Hera helping him to adjust to losing his sight?
hi! thank you for the prompt!! (also I love your art!!) I hope you like it, I might have strayed a little because it's less helping him adjust and more like hera just being there for him...but I hope you still like it!
fandom: star wars rebels
relationship: kanan jarrus/hera syndulla
word count: 1.2k
rating: t
~
Hera woke to a crash that echoed loudly throughout the Ghost, her eyes snapping open at the jarring sound. Panic fled through her system, as a million scenarios began to race through her mind, each one of them worse than the last. She tore back her sheets, her hand reaching for her comlink when another crash thundered through the ship, this time followed by a guttural cry that made her blood freeze in her veins.
She was moving before she could even think.
It was dark in Kanan’s cabin, the floor strewn with splinters of wood and broken pieces of clay that Hera distantly recognized as the remains of the tray that held his dinner. In the center of the chaos was Kanan.
“Kanan?” she whispered, taking careful steps around the broken shards of plaster. He tilted his head towards her but said nothing, the ragged sound of his breathing filling the space. “What happened?”
Kanan didn’t respond, he just stood there, his body shaking with angry tremors. Hera bit down on her tongue and forced the swell of emotions building in her throat down until she couldn’t feel them. She reached out, her fingertips grazing his arm, causing him to flinch.
“It’s alright love, it’s just me.” she said.
“Hera?” Kanan’s voice was rough when he spoke, the words scraping out past dry lips.
“I’m right here.” she replied, pushing gently on his arm to get him to move away from the mess that surrounded him. He followed willingly, letting Hera guide him back to his cot. He was trembling under her touch, his skin overheated and damp from sweat.
She helped him sit down, taking his hand into her own “What happened?” she asked again, even though she already knew the answer. Things hadn’t been easy for Kanan since Malachor. He was still learning to adjust to his loss of sight and tasks that used to be simple were now far more complicated.
The crew had done the best they could to keep walkways clear of clutter and always offered to help Kanan get around on the rare occasion that he actually left his cabin yet Kanan had always staunchly refused, determined to do it on his own.
But Hera knew the truth. She knew he was only putting up a front. She knew he was afraid. She knew that he feared he would be seen as a liability, a burden, as if by losing his sight he was somehow less than the man he was before.
It didn’t matter how many times Hera had told him otherwise, he never seemed to believe it.
Kanan swallowed thickly before responding in a stilted manner. “I was going to the fresher and I tripped.” His jaw clenched tightly as he hissed, “I don’t even know where that kriffing tray came from.”
“Sabine brought it in earlier, when you missed dinner.” she told him gently. Kanan’s jaw didn’t relax. “Why didn’t you call for help?”
“I shouldn’t have to!” he exploded, wrenching his hand from her grip.
His words were like a slap to the face. “I-I’m sorry.” she fumbled at the intensity of his anger. He had become more and more withdrawn as the days progressed but he had never been so outwardly angry at her before. It made her stomach twist uncomfortably. “If I had known I would have helped you.”
“That’s not-” Kanan sighed, his chin dropping to his chest. “That’s not what I meant.” He turned his head towards her. Even in the dim lighting Hera could see the bandage around his eyes had become soiled with an unpleasant yellowish brown tinge. The surrounding skin still looked red and inflamed, no doubt burning with a pain that not even bacta could dampen. “I shouldn’t need help getting to the ‘fresher.” he said quietly.
Hera felt her heart splinter.
She reached up and cupped the side of his face, her thumb resting just below his wound. “Kanan,” she said. “You’re still healing, it’s okay to ask for help.”
“I could walk the Ghost blindfolded before all this.” he guestered weakly at his face. “Now I can’t make it two steps without falling over something.” he paused, his frustrations palpable. “It doesn’t make any sense.”
“Walking around blindfolded isn’t the same thing.” she told him. “You went through a trauma that impacted more than just your sight. Remember what the doctor said? It’s going to take time for you to adjust.”
Kanan nodded, but from the frown on his face, he didn’t seem convinced. “When was the last time you changed your bandage?”
He shrugged. “I don’t remember.”
“C’mon, I’ve got the stuff in my cabin. I’ll help you.”
He let her pull him to his feet, their hands intertwined as she led him around the mess on the floor and into her room. He looked small, sitting on her bed as she drug through the medpac, it was unsettling. Kanan had always been this unshakable presence in her life, seeing him suffer as he was, struggling to adapt to his new way of life made her heart ache and her eyes to sting with tears but Hera pushed them away. Crying wasn’t going to help him heal. He needed support and Hera was more than willing to give it to him.
She’d do anything to make him feel like himself again.
Hera knelt down in front of him on the cot, his long legs brushing against her own. She could see that he was still trembling but it wasn’t as violent as it had been before.
“I’m sorry.” Kanan said as she began her work. She resisted the urge to wince as she peeled the bandage back, exposing the charred wound that cut across his face. Bacta might be a miracle worker but she doubted even it would be able to completely erase the damage Maul had caused.
“There’s nothing to apologize for, love.” she said, gently applying the thick gel like substance to his burned skin.
“I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”
“No you shouldn’t have, but I can understand why you did.”
“That doesn’t make it right.” his hand caught hers, stopping her ministrations. Eyes that were once a vibrant blue-green now a milky white born into her. “I’m sorry.”
Hera leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. “I forgive you.” she said. “Your healing is going to take time, love. And I know you're frustrated but please don’t pull away from me. Let me help you. I want to help you. Can you promise me that?”
“I can try,” he said, resting his forehead against hers.
“That’s all I ask.” she breathed. “Now let me take care of you.”
Kanan nodded, his forehead moving against hers. “Aye, Captain.” he said with a ghost of a smile. Hera kissed him again, longer this time just to prove her point.
“I love you Kanan Jarrus.” she told him, wishing he could feel just how much she meant those words. He was the center of her universe, the very air in the lungs, her weakness and her strength. He was everything to her.
She loved him totally, completely, unconditionally. She loved him.
Kanan’s grip on her wrist tightened ever so slightly before he let go, letting her finish.
As soon as she had applied the fresh bandage, Kanan pulled her down into his arms, tucking his head under her chin. Hera’s arms wrapped around him on instinct, holding him close. She carded her fingers through the long strands of his hair, letting the sound of his breathing lull her to sleep.
“Thank you.” she felt him say against her skin as she drifted off.
"For what?" she asked, barely conscience.
"For not giving up on me." he shuttered in her arms.
"I'll never give up on you, love." Hera pulled him closer, kissing the top of his head. "You're stuck with me until I say so and I don't feel like giving up up just yet."
"Because of my good looks?" he teased.
"Damn straight." Hera replied.
"I knew you only wanted me for my body."
"Kanan," Hera said. "Please shut up and go to sleep."
She felt Kanan smile against her collarbone. "Love you." he mumbled.
"I love you too." Hera replied.
Things would get better. Kanan would adjust and things would get better and Hera would be there every step of the way.
7. A medium of art you don't work in but appreciate?
hmm i would have to say linograph printing/printing in general!! i feel like they always come out looking so cool and you can get such vivid colours. but i do get bored carving out stuff i've already drawn & waiting for inks to dry & layering </3
11. Do you listen to anything while drawing? If so, what?
i have to listen to smth while drawing!! i feel like most people are the same. if i'm just drawing mindlessly i'll put on a video essay/a commentary video/a stream in the background (usually jerma). if the drawing is actually hard and i have to concentrate i'll put on music 👍
30. What piece of yours do you think is underrated?
Hello! Just saying I would absolutely LOVE to hear more about Fern if you ever feel like sharing! I’m already so intrigued with what I’ve read about them so far!
AAAA this means a lot to me eliott!!! I'm actually trying to format a post now bc despite the nerves i really want to share them w others ;-; sdfgh there's still things that I'm trying to figure out but i feel like that will always be there so I'm just gonna go ahead and type out the things i do have and i can always add or remove things hehe. also this ask made me SMILE thank u
add on to the object head thing: i had a tv head and so many people pushed the buttons and tapped my screen that the bottom corner of the screen popped out, and my power button got stuck in the down position. luckily it was all easily fixed. i was too shy to tell people to back off but next time i go out in it, im definitely gonna tell people to keep their hands off after all the damage it had x_x
Its such a kindergarten rule! Keep yer hands to yerself!!!!!