Citrus Ruins Bloopers
These are scenes I have planned in a funny (or at least I think they’re funny) crack summary, so spoilers ahead!
(Also there’ll be some rarepairs, one a semi-QPR that most of the fandom won’t agree with, so please no hate on it T-T)
Mira pat Gentry’s shoulder, giving her an encouraging smile. “Good luck, Gentry! And remember, you only have to engage long enough for the spell to gauge how much the curse is affecting Mikey’s family. Don’t torture yourself.”
“I won’t,” Gentry promised. “You can count on me!”
~several hours later~
The door slid open and Mikey perked up. Gentry had a faraway look in her eyes, and she stumbled into the chair at the small table the group was sitting at.
“So?” Usagi asked. “How’d it go?”
Gentry took a second to answer. “So. I have a girlfriend now.”
Usagi recoiled, Mikey shot up.
“WHAT?!”
“How’d that happen?!” Usagi demanded.
“I-I don’t know!” Gentry exclaimed. “We ran into each other in the market, I said hi, then she spent the next half hour apologizing and no matter how hard I tried to get her to stop she just wouldn’t and then she took me out to dinner and the next thing I knew I was meeting the family, Donnie was so awkward and Leo kept teasing us and Raph was crying because we were apparently really cute together? Splinter gave us his blessing to get married?? I met her mom??? We exchanged numbers and now we’re going out again tomorrow! I’m her little G-Pop and she’s my Ape we have pet names already and gosh she’s so hot—“
“YOU’RE DATING MY SISTER?!” Mikey cried out.
Gentry was red all the way up to her ears, so burying her face in her hands did nothing to hide it.
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Usagi: *leaning against the doorframe leading to Mikey’s room* Come here often? *wink*
Mikey: Uh… this is my bedroom…?
~later~
Usagi: I was trying to flirt, Mike…
Mikey: Ohmigosh I am so sorry— we can do it again if you want—
Usagi: No, no, it’s fine, really 🤣
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*Slash and Mikey first meeting*
Slash: *exists*
Mikey: I love you big bro!!
Slash: Go f*** yourself.
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*Every Orange Twist interaction ever*
Frida: *exists*
Mikey: I would kill and/or die for you my dearest twin I love you so much
Frida, internally: Great Spirits I’m a horrible person, an absolutely terrible person I’ve tricked the most pure and loving person on the planet into caring for me oh spirits oh spirits—
Frida, externally: Yeah, whatever, squirt.
————————————————————————
Leo: Oh… oh gosh… Mikey… you really are our brother…
Mikey (aka Dr. Delicate Touch): Bitch that’s what I’ve been SAYING—
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Usagi: And that’s my great, and tragic backstory and why I’m training to be a witch instead of a samurai, like all my ancestors before me…
Mikey, trying not to laugh:
Usagi: It’s not funny!
Mikey: I’m sorry, it’s just the image of an emo samurai is just too hilarious!
Usagi: I’ll have you know ninjas are historically known as villains and assassins in Japan, while Samurai’s are great warriors who fought to protect the rights of the people!
Mikey: Yeah, but ninjas are cooler.
Usagi: They’re literally not—
Mikey, channeling Leo, professional rage baiter: Nah, they totally are, samurai’s are totally lame, major L
Usagi: WHY are you my partner—
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Frida: I’m going to kill her.
Mikey: Absolutely not!
Frida: Look, I know you’re self righteous and murder is against your principles, but it’s the only way to—
Mikey: Girlie you are in the WRONG outfit you’ll get caught in a minute you’re way too conspicuous. Wear this instead, you’ll blend in more and stand out less.
Frida: …
(Alternate version:
Frida: I think we’re gonna have to kill this guy, Mikey.
Mikey: Darn.)
————————————————————————
Usagi: And who’s the cutest guy in the whole wide world?
Mikey: Aw—
Frida, straight faced: I am.
Slash: Me.
Frida and Slash at the same time, completely monotone: I’m the cutest.
————————————————————————
Mikey: So… I may or may not have done something while trying to reverse time…
Usagi: There are SEVERAL red flags in that statement, but I’ll get to them later. What did you do?
Slash:
Mikey: I found my long lost brother in an alternate abandoned dimension.
Slash: Die.
Mikey: He’s not much of a people person.
*Slash in the background holding up the couch with one hand and taking bites out of it like it’s a cracker*
————————————————————————
Mikey: Wow! I’m so lucky Witch Town decided to let me stay here despite what my brother did to them!
All of Witch Town: If anything happened to this boy we would kill everyone in this universe and then ourselves.
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Leo: You ever get the sense that something’s just… missing from your life?
Donnie: My cameras are malfunctioning. You’re missing their all seeing presence.
Leo: …
Donnie: I record everything, Leonardo.
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CJ: So… hypothetically—
Donnie: Don’t you dare!!
CJ: huh?
Donnie: Every time you say “hypothetically” it’s something from the future that you know coming back to bite us in the butt!
CJ: That’s not true!
Raph, staring at Leo and Casey making out in the background: No, no, Don’s got a point.
CJ: My parents have nothing to do with this.