#ggtips

[weslyngossip]

lennox and austen have been awfully close lately, don't you think?

Who cares? The story of LS and AC is dreadfully boring--they have a threesome with the resident man whore and take more interest in open holes than what’s supposed to be going in them. *Yawn.* I happen to have information about AC that is far more interesting and likely to flip a few lives upside down. A valuable source has informed me that AC’s lesbionic tendencies didn’t just start with LS, and that on the contrary, she’s been a member of the mile high club since last summer! Congratulations are in order for two, though because the person who helped get her there was none other than my favorite deadbeat, AG--Playboy Mommy will be so proud when she finds out. Perhaps that’s why AC entered the halls of Weslyn Prep so confidently on the first day of school, she still had an afterglow that lasted ever since she hopped off the plane at JFK with a pair of panties in her cardigan.                             you know you love me,                                  xoxo, gossip girl.

[weslyngossip]

where did faris go on his weekend away? any ideas?

My flawlessly natural instincts tell me probably a whore house to get his fill for not only the time S has fallen off the face of the Earth, but also for however long he’s going to be stuck with her for. For someone who thinks so highly of himself, F's standards for a committed sex life are incredibly low.                             you know you love me,                                  xoxo, gossip girl.

[weslyngossip]

what's going on with onyx and dakota?

Another painfully stereotypical blossoming love story, I’m afraid, my precious little follower. The resident weirdo O, who tries too hard to be a tough girl under that sickeningly perfect skin, falls for the resident loser D, who has more secrets to hide than the PLL writers (talk about a disappointment of a finale) but still tries to play himself off like an average guy. It’s a set-up for disaster, my anonymous pet. O doesn’t do commitment and the second D gets in too deep, they’re going to crash and burn and I hope no one is around to put out the flames when they do.                               you know you love me,                                    xoxo, gossip girl.

[weslyngossip]

Totally spotted Connie and Nox leaving a club in SoHo with a group of ridiculously hot guys. I didn't know they had it in them.

I suppose you were fast asleep last night when I introduced us all to a side of C no one knew existed. Didn’t your mother ever tell you? Don’t judge a book by its cover. As for C and L’s wild night out — believe it or not, coincidentally, I happened to be in that exact same club and the rumours are true. Not only were C and N spotted sharing drinks, but later on in the night, rumor has it they were spotted sharing men.                                you know you love me,                                     xoxo, gossip girl.