#ghostbug au

[bugswags]

More shattered glass breakbee bullshiiiiiittttt

[bugswags]

Ghostbug

[heartfulselkie]

Is ghostbug always around, or does come and go?

I mean

Like

Is there like a radius she needs to be in?

Can she go visit her family and watch herself?

I feel like that would be really painful.

Watching your life from the outside, knowing that something essential that made you you is just gone.

Knowing that what you are is the end for this version of you.

And knowing that the other you lives without ever knowing how it is to be loved.

All the experiences, all of the moments of vulnerability and discovery, the life you've given everything to - all of that effort just evaporated.

No more confidence. No more resolve. No more work ethic.

It's your beta version.

And with her, the world doesn't need you anymore.

Ghostbug generally stays close to Adrien. She gets really worried about him if he's out of her sight. She hasn't really experimented much with a potential radius since she doesn't want to get separated.

She does go to her own room (or at least her other self's room) eventually, but only as a last resort..

Ghostbug kind of dissociates from the "other Marinette". It's a little weird seeing another you that acts like you, but then also doesn't act like you. There's a lot of feelings to unpack there, but Ghostbug is doing what she does best by ignoring one set of feelings for a different set of feelings - that being her concern for Adrien.

She can't think too hard about how she and this Marinette are essentially the same person when all her focus is on fixing whatever issue has caused this and smoothing over all the hurt, stress and anxiety this Adrien has gone through.

Being so focused on one aspect of the big picture isn't always the best method though...

And remember we haven't seen a lot of alternate Marinette yet, and its mostly been through Adrien's POV. And Adrien's memory and version of things clearly isn't the most reliable.

No confidence? No resolve? No work ethic? How can you be so sure? This is still Marinette. She's different, but she's still the same person underneath. Perhaps her strength just comes across in quieter ways, or perhaps she hasn't had her chance to be loud about what she can really do.

This is still the same Marinette that *could* have been Ladybug. Why she isn't in this timeline? Well, that's part of the mystery.

[heartfulselkie]

Thinking about Kaleidoscope AU... (cause hey it's after 3am and I'm very sleep deprived these days but so is Adrien in this AU because of ✨the weight of responsibility and something sinister ✨)

Adrien is used to running on little sleep and being awake at odd hours. It's not for lack of trying because he is exhausted and at the end of the day would love nothing more than to fall into bed and get a comfortable and full night's sleep.

But being the son of a strict parent with high expectations is hard. Being a teen model for the sake of pleasing other people is hard. Being a superhero that's holding up the city's safety on his own back by himself is hard. But these are all things he can't quit or take a break from. There is no other option besides doing it all. He's been raised with the mindset that he can do anything that gets thrown at himnand he will do it all even as he is slowly breaking down.

And this horrifies Ghostbug.

She's finally seeing it from the other side of how she was as Ladybug - the isolation and the rules and the standards and the stress she held herself to because she was Ladybug and she could handle it.

She's understanding now the hurt and the anger Chat Noir felt when she wouldn't let him in and let him help or comfort her. Because she's also angry at how powerless she feels in this situation. Adrien is right there going through this nightmarish situation and she can't do anything to alleviate his burden right then and there.

She can talk with him but she knows that can only do so much when it feels like your mind is constantly buzzing. But her lack of physical form leaves her unable to do much else.

She can't catch him when his body finally gives out when he detransforms.

She can't hold his hand or rub his back to help ground him when the panic attacks hit.

She can't make sure that he has a blanket when he falls asleep on the sofa.

She can only watch over him and hope that maybe tomorrow things will be better. Maybe tomorrow they'll figure this out.

Surely getting Adrien to notice the Marinette of this timeline and making them fall in love like they're supposed to is the key to fixing all of this. Then Adrien could have someone he can physically feel when they sit next to him - someone who can do all the things that Ghostbug is so awfully lacking in.

She just has to hope that this new form of physical attacks Adrien is suffering from is only something minor, just something temporary that will pass quickly. Similar and yet different to the panic attacks, these ones keep happening after he detransforms. He's coughing. He's struggling to breathe. They leave him trembling on his hands and knees in front of her.

And then there's the blood. Why is there blood?

[artfulselkie]

Sometimes Ghostbug will just stare quietly at Adrien. He's not sure why, but he's not complaining 😳

Ghostbug sometimes gets lost in thought when she looks at Adrien. It's hard to pretend that the memories and love you once shared with someone aren't there...

[heartfulselkie]

Can I ask what your process was like when designing Mr bug for your kaleidoscope au?

Hmm it started with the idea that Kaleidoscope's Adrien is an Adrien that has never known Ladybug and never became the "Mister Bug" that we see in canon (aka the main timeline).

Mister Bug in the main timeline is Adrien's answer to how he sees Ladybug - and its even Ladybug who gives him the name Mister Bug. Without her influence, Kaleidoscope!Adrien is creating his image of a "ladybug hero" from his own idea - so he becomes "Crimson Bug" instead.

For coming up witha new design myself, I looked at all the existing "Ladybugs" in the show (so Ladybug, Mister Bug and Scarabella) to see what kind of shapes/styling I liked. I also considered Chat Noir, Aspik and Catwalker as those are specific to Adrien.

Looking at Adrien's choice of outfits, he tends to lean towards something with a more armoured look - he normally has something with wrists/gloves, boots and shoulders.

From there it was just about how to incorporate these shapes into a black and red design and where to add the ladybug spots. Since I was going for a design with a more interesting shape, I didn't want to overdo the spots. Ladybug's outfit works being completely spotted because its a simple bodysuit, but it gets messy if you have an outfit with more to it.

I ended up giving Kaleidoscope!Adrien a black base and building up the spotted armour pieces around that (because maybe black is a comforting colour for him to wear? who knows...)

I was also actually considering power rangers costume design as well when I was thinking what Crimson Bug could wear. I think specifically the Dino Thunder era power rangers? Since that's what I remember watching as a kid. This ended up not manifesting greatly in what I ended up with other than Crimson Bug having a snazzy belt.

This probably would be a lot better explained with some drawings to go along with it - but I do plan to do a proper "intro" post for Kaleidoscope which has the redesigns included! I just need some time when I'm actually able to do it lol

[heartfulselkie]

Sneak peak panel of something I'm working on...

[heartfulselkie]

Nothing could be as unlucky as a pair of ladybugs, right? Right?

My Kaleidoscope AU continues to live rent-free in my head and since its almost Halloween I figured its as good a time as any to draw Ghostbug and Crimson Bug who she affectionately haunts 🥰