#JAMES LOVE LANGUAGE: MUUUUUUUUUUUURDER #WHEN LOYALTY IS A WEAPON YOU CAN AIM. -- im screaming at your tags!! so poetic and also hilarious
Hahaha I love James and his Murder Robot mating rituals:
On first date decides to show off to Teresa the thoroughness of his assassination plots like the world’s most messed up compatibility algorithm. (1x05)
“Wait—you don’t want me to reciprocate your Romantic Murder Gesture of killing the FL guy that could ID me by murdering the maid who saw your face??? How else will you know I care???”
Cannot verbally express An Emotion but puts on his best puppy dog eyes and offers to murder a federal agent for her (2x04).
If Murderrrr won’t do, has literally never met a person who wants to harm him that he doesn’t immediately try and surrender himself to once it’d give Teresa even a sliver of daylight to escape.
And let’s just say Teresa “shit Guero must really love me b/c of this half assed escape plan” Mendoza is NOT IMMUNE to the appeal of James “let me get my sniper rival” Valdez. We can talk about the look on her face when James kicks that guy in the face back in 1x04 but let’s skip ahead to 3x09 when James murders someone specifically for Teresa in front of Teresa and they practically start ripping each other’s clothes off in front of Pote.