OH FUCK LOOK WHAT I FOUND IN MY DRAFTS?? its the outline of a whole kotobuki/kaito (kaibuki..) fic.. i think i was putting off publishing this bc 'if i end up writing it then itll spoil everything', WELL it is clear that i am never going to write it so :
- grocery checkout person buki
- rooming with kai
- this is a kaibuki fic
- he has to deal with kou. he is exhausted
- he is intj hands down
- maybe infj
- regardless there is one thing certain. he thinks he knows The Truth™️
- is a cat
- can push too much and come off as abrasive and arrogant
- burned puff?
- trust issues
- his roommate kai is entirely too concerned with the affairs of his “"friend”“(?????)
- (kotobuki does, privately, suspect that kai has romantic inclinations to kei)
- thought he was a frivolous naive character but he’s honest and reliable. warms up to him Slowly
- now listens and offers advice(?) when kai is talking about something or other about kei
- perceives own relationship with kai as distant in comparison. feels like he is ”“lying”“ or exaggerating when he expresses concern for kotobuki and it pisses him off
- it’s that feeling of either I’m his number one or I’m his nothing at all. but that points to a want to monopolise and there’s no way buki will even subconsciously acknowledge that
- buki probably teaches kai the value of not fucking sacrificing yourself for the sake of other people (read: kei) like caring? Great! but don’t toss yourself under the bus and also have some other facets to your identity lmao
- honestly him staying with buki probably gave him stability and grounding in a time where kai had only kei who was flaking out on him anyway.
- eventually i think kai considers leaving. i do not think buki is surprised. just cynically resigned. like ‘welp we all knew this was gonna happen and ur a fucking fool for hoping otherwise lol’
- except. kai keeps coming back around
- (his own track record with maintaining communication is terrible. he talks to kei about it, who is equally terrible, but now that he has to deal with kou he has Some insight on the matter
- stuff like. 'he won’t stop texting me. he is going to text me from beyond the grave and i am going to become a hermit and gain immortality so he can’t talk to me in person once I’m dead’ or. he just shows up. he doesn’t say a Fucking thing suddenly and he shows up at the door out of nowhere. kai takes mental notes.)
- (basically he’s asking kei 'how do you stay friends with someone and show them you still want to be around them when you’re not literally living together’. kei stares at him incredulously for a very long time)
- buki does not know what he wants. he is Confused and a confused buki is defensive and acerbic
- pretty much assumes kai is coming back for a Reason and that reason is that he Wants Something but also there is no possible way that 'something’ is friendship
- seems like buki Had friends but they betrayed him in a big way and now he is spiky
- his old friend after all never attempted to make up with him. now here kai is apparently doing just that, except he never 'betrayed’ him so why was buki so hurt when he ditched??????
- (spoilers. it’s the power of friendship and the beginnings of infatuation)
- after years of dealing with kei kai is perceptive tho. he knows buki is attempting to keep a measured distance between them
- he may not pick up so quickly on the conflicted feelings though
- probably they can teach each other the healthy inbetween of relationships
- don’t be codependent and self sacrificing but also don’t withdraw completely as a defense
- back to kai he probably just lays it straight out but sort of roundabout?? like how he comforted kei on the number of ajin
- straight up 'so buki are we friends or did before not count because we were living together’
- he goes bsod. ideally the entire universe ceases to exist then and there but it doesn’t and he just stares at him for an indefinite amount of time
- there’s nothing buki can say that will get him smoothly out of this. the only thing he wants to do right now is protect himself and not have to make himself vulnerable by exposing Feelings®️
- honestly??? he probably does say something shitty for the sake of saving himself but at the expense of kai. like 'so it just takes living together for you to think you’re all buddy buddy lol???’
- ofc he’s made a mistake because now that he’s said it kai can see right through him. like when someone doesn’t notice something and you go 'yep it’s definitely not broken!!!! haha :)’
- you fool. you alerted the enemy
- that’s when kai says something disgustingly and embarrassingly sincere like
- 'no that’s not what it takes to make friends. it takes listening to each other and having fun together and wanting to spend more time with them and know more about them and how they’re doing. so yea i thought were friends’
- that’s it. you killed the buki
- he is not good at being honest and upfront about his feelings. he is afraid f getting hurt but everything he wants is being handed to him. if he takes it he’ll just get hurt again but is it not worth risking over just running away and going back to his empty house and dreary life????
- plus if there’s one thing that kai taught him it’s that there’s value in perseverance and holding out hope even after falling. his 'asshole friend nagai’ full ditched him but he continued to pursue friendships with both him and possibly even Buki and he cannot say that it isn’t admirable
- so yea he probably cries
- he threatens murder immediately but kai won’t tell a damn soul and says as much
- so now they are officially Friends
- now they’re just doing the same thing as befor but with less suspicion on kotobukis part
- it’s honestly probably a good thing for buki because now he can sort his own feelings abt their relationship better re which parts were just cohabitation side effects and which parts were legit affection??
- kai was also like attention starved so time away gives him a chance to separate that need from actually liking buki as a person
- thus begins the blooming of romantic pining
- they probably move back in together once they’ve got their own stuff sorted out and they’re dating but also bc they quickly realised it saved A Lot of money
- they become that boringly practical married couple friend
- superficially people would be inclined to ask kai 'how did u end up with That asshole?????’
- that’s bc they don’t know that he is also a weirdo
- also where buki is more likely to cut with words and is willing to take a hit kai is more of a puncher
- so actually that’s even better omg they would be the absolute worst. if u let yourself be goaded by buki (and it is difficult not to be unless ur name is kai) then u put yourself in danger of getting fucking murdered by kai
most of the people in my class tonight either ditched before class started or came super late and arent even doing much. ive come across 2 friends who were crying, too. // sighhh
