#goddamn emotions

[lemon-icarus]

me, two days ago: okay I'm kinda bored I'm just going to start playing Life is Strange finally because it'll be a bit brain dead and I won't get so emotionally attached like I did in Expedition 33. I'm gonna be normal about this one I know it's a choice-driven game but no pressure. I can fuck this one up

me, now: *actively sobbing* hey what the fUCk why didn't it wrok I said I wasn't going to get emotioknally attached BRAIN I SAID NOT TO GET EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED NO

[aceplayer123]

Kill the part of you that cringes Kill the part of you that cringes Kill the part of you that cringes Kill the part of you that cringes Kill the part of you that-

[inimitablebiscuit]

Finally finished watching this year's Sewing Bee and got really sad that Raph & his partner hadn't seen each other IRL for 2 ½ months.

[picassobws]

.

[maniacmp3]

Replay always make me so warm inside

[fuelthenarcissism-blog]

The Implant. 10th Feb 2017

So I got the contraceptive implant last week and true to its hormonal nature it has been taking me on the mother of all emotional roller coasters over the last ten days. Some side effects have included:

Getting angry for no reason whatsoever.

Getting angry for very minor reasons.

Getting angry for very understandable reasons.

Getting so angry I nearly cried.

Admittedly I have been having a rough time of it anyway what with the awful fucking cold I developed that is currently insistent on forcing me to cough up most of my lung tissue and the unfortunate living circumstances I unwittingly put myself in (4 months, 18 days, 9 hours, 28 minutes and 6 seconds to go at the time of writing). The copious amount of alcohol I consumed the space of 72 hours probably didn’t help either but it was a good temporary coping mechanism so we’re ignoring that.

I have a long, long history with my ridiculously complicated mood swings but when I came off my anti-depressants in September 2016 they all mysteriously vanished and I became this surprisingly relaxed human being. That has now all gone to shit and I’m not sure that not having to worry about pregnancy (and possibly periods?) for the next three years is entirely worth it. We’ll see. Not having to deal with a bucket of blood fighting its way out of my vagina every month might actually be worth the anger but sadly there’s no guarantee that’s going to happen.

Ideally, I’m hoping that the anger will all seep away and I’ll find my inner zen again and that the packets of pads in the bathroom will stay there long enough to gather dust, that would be the perfect outcome. However, I of all people am well acquainted with the fact that drugs never do exactly what they say on the tin and if they do, they’re going to give you a bunch of unpleasant shit to deal with on top everything else. That’s just life.

The one upside to all this is that wiggling the bar makes my arm look really funny and is a sure-fire way to make me giggle when I’m sleepy.

Oh, and the greatly reduced risk of pregnancy. Obviously.

Here’s hoping that things don’t stay shit.

[periodds]

Part of me is pissed off and part of me wants to cry

[ohgodnooclockinthemorning-blog]

The Raven King Countdown

20. Favorite scenes from blue lily lily blue;

I’m going to go with my gut here, and say that one of my favorite scenes is when they descend into the cavern under Cabeswater, descend into the cavern filled with skeletons of creatures long since stuck in time - It feels like (especially with Gwenllian there) that’s when the realness of it becomes blatantly unavoidable. Also this:  “I know when I'm awake and when I'm asleep," Ronan Lynch said. Adam Parrish, curled over himself in a pair of battered, greasy coveralls, asked, "Do you?" "Maybe I dreamt you," he said. "Thanks for the straight teeth, then," Adam replied.”

And when Ronan takes Adam to the barns because I mean really.