"I've got a can of spray paint" Nygmobblepot (Because I'm curious to see how you make that work)
I made is high school and Genderqueer Ed becuase I can
It had been a year of knowing Ed Nygma. The lanky dork who had been trying the punk look for months but still needed a lot of guidance. Now, Oswald sat in the fire escape, throwing ripped up paper into the alley below. Ed climbed up to him, using their unnecessarily long limbs to skip steps and cut around corners. Ed was wearing a grey Dead Kennedys shirt, black skinny jeans, and –much to Oswald’s dismay– a bedazzled, glittery leather vest. They looked like they had killed a disco ball and sewn the remains onto their clothing. It was utterly ridiculous, but so, painfully Ed.
“I’ve got a can of spray paint,” Ed’s face was split into a too wide mischievous grin, Ed’s smile was always too wide. It was just another thing that made Ed, Ed. Another one of those things was their refusal to let Oswald to throw out their bedazzler–honestly, Ed if you’re going for a dangerous punk look stop putting glitter everywhere– and their insistence that they did in fact need 17 pairs of suspenders.
“And?”
“You’re not in the mood for petty vandalism?” Ed pushed the can back into the backpack, and slid the bag to the side. Sitting next to Oswald.
“Not if you’re only going to leave green question marks everywhere,” Oswald quipped,
“Well, you told me my insults suck,” Ed huffed, a little defensive.
“That’s because you are the only person in Gotham who uses the word ‘ignoramus,’ you would make it too easy to figure out who it was, especially if you keep wearing a disco ball’s carcass as a vest.”
“I thought you liked my vest?” Ed said a little self-consciously, fidgeting their hands the way they did when they were unsure of themself. Right, Ed needed help in understanding the difference between light-hearted teasing and-…
“I love your stupid vest Ed, and I love my stupid lover, and their stupid sense of fashion too, but we can hardly go on a vandalism spree if you are wearing the flashiest thing you own,” Oswald softened his voice, and peppered kissed on Ed’s face as they giggled. Ed laid down, their head in Oswald’s lap, looking up at him.The two enjoyed a long moment of peace, Ed might’ve even dozed off a little. “You want to do something rebellious?”
“Yea?” Ed asked, without opening their eyes.
“Let’s get tattoos,” Ed sat bolt upright and whirled around, grabbing Oswald’s shoulders.
“Are you kidding me! Tattoos!? Do you have any idea how irresponsible it is to alter your body like that, especially as such a young age!” their eyes were wide and their voice was almost shrill, it was adorable.
“Says the one who came here to suggest vandalism,” Oswald smirked back. Ed’s mouth hung open like a fish, they shut it.
“Touche.” Ed muttered before settling back into their boyfriend’s lap. “What about hair dye?”
“What about it?”
“Do you want to…?”
“How, don’t you have to book an appointment like a month in advance?”
“Well, we could use the spray paint…” oh you resourceful little brainiac…
“That is a truly horrible idea.”
“So, we’re not gonna-?” Ed sat up, turning back towards him with questioning eyes.
“No. We are without a doubt doing it.” Ed’s responding grin was almost manic. You snarky thing you. His mom was going to kill them when the two came home with technicolour hair. “Now, give it,” Ed handed over the backpack, excitedly biting their bottom lip as they grinned. They were abuzz with energy, Ed was always a jittery ball of smiles when they got excited. Like a damn puppy. “There are two cans of spray paint in here, Ed.”
“The second one was supposed to be a surprise.”
“Is that why it’s purple?”
“Purple suits you,” Ed shrugged.
“You first, green-bean,” Oswald shook the can of green and sprayed a patch of Ed’s brown hair. It flattened under the pressure and Ed yelped.
“Too close! Too close! Ah, it’s cold!” Oswald laughed then tried again, holding the can farther away and being careful not to get Ed’s skin. When the green was finished Ed stood, bent over the railing with their head upside down and the bright green paint dripping from their curls. It took ten minutes of drip/air drying. The green paint had stiffened Ed’s curls and they stuck up in such silly ways. Oswald may have snorted. “It’s your turn, now Ozzie!” It was cold.
Surely enough when they showed up at home (Oswald’s and his mother’s apartment was always open to Ed) the two of them received a preliminary scolding. Why do you sweet children do such things without warning me?! But she had ultimately not disproved of it, so a month later Ed had green tipped hair and Oswald had a few purple streaks. The two may or may not have left a few green and purple spray paint works to celebrate and commemorate the occasion…
