THE HARD PART ISN’T MAKING THE DECISION;
how long had it been since he last saw the world -- since he last saw grail larsen?
those were the things alden elliott didn’t know. though, at first he barely even knew his name -- he barely knew where he was. hell, he didn’t even know what happened. when he woke up, all he knew was pain. his chest was burning -- even then that’s not enough words for how the terrible the pain going through his body was.
the vision made him toss and turn in bed. he dreamed his premonitions before, but this time it was a first for a lot of things. not once had his visions made his body move so much from them. more importantly, not once had he envisioned someone’s death.
his.
there he was, standing in the line of fire. one, two, threefourfive, six bullets went through his chest. and when it was done, he woke in a sweat and scream.
“what is it?” a familiar sleep-heavy voice cut into his racing thoughts. alden’s chest tightened as he looked over at his partner’s bed.
he couldn’t tell him -- there was no way he could tell him.
he forced one of those charming smiles, though he knew it didn’t reach his eyes. it was a good thing it was dark. his dry chuckle cut into the air and he shook his head. “it was nothing but a bad dream. go back to sleep, partner.”
with his chest tightening, alden knew he had to keep this from grail. if the other male knew, he would do something stupid to prevent his death. alden didn’t want that. he loved grail far too much for him to die. he also could not run from his fate. he was fully aware of that. he could change it, but he couldn’t run from it.
it all came back to him. he was supposed to be dead. he was shot six times trying to protect -- grail! he didn’t how many enemies were around them. nor did he remember how many were aiming at him. those were all a blur. then again, it was a miracle that he could remember as much as he did. no, that wasn’t the miracle. the miracle was the fact that he was alive. the pain was intense and were people holding him down?
alden’s eyes flew around the room in wild shock and fear. it was clear that the people were from the country. were they enemies? were they friends? right now, his mind couldn’t process the answer even if it was so obvious.
“LET ME GO!” he shouted as he tried to sit up and fight away their holds. he was too weak and the pain that joined his struggling was beyond words. he fought so hard to keep himself from screaming, from crying out, from looking weak. “WHO ARE YOU? LET ME GO!”
no one answered him. perhaps they didn’t understand him or maybe they just chose to ignore the ravings of a man whom was barely in the right state of mind. instead, all they did was slam him back on the table. one of the men went back to working on his wound and he couldn’t hold back his scream, whilst another shot him with something. it was easy to figure out what it was as he faded back into the black unconsciousness. while he was out he dreamed.
the day he met grail was one he couldn’t forget. especially because of the showy way he made his entrance. after all not that many military men pulled up ferraris, nor did they climb out wearing gucci suits.
“what a pretentious asshole,” alden thought to himself.
he was probably no better, though. he looked young and with his clothing, he looked scrawny maybe even weak. he had the looks that would never scream someone in the military as well. with his stylish blonde hair and golden eyes, it was almost safe to say he looked like someone who should be on the cover of a magazine instead (a dream he’d never consider i his life).
he felt eyes on him and he flicked them in the direction of the person. it was the same man whom he was just silently judging to himself staring at him through his ray bans. of course, he would have designer sunglasses to go with that suit and car of his. it didn’t surprise alden all that much honestly.
his next thought did surprise him to an extent, however. “for being a showoff, he’s still hot as hell.”
who knew that that one thought would grow into so much more as their time together grew.
when alden comes to again, the pain’s still there, but it’s been patched up. the people are gone, so that puts him at ease. he knows now they couldn’t have been enemies. he’d probably be dead for sure by now. his head is clear enough to realize that. he should be dead, though.
what happened? how did they find him? how did he live?
those questions were not as important to him right now. in fact, his main concern was grail. did he make it out alive? that was the very reason he jumped in front of those bullets. alden didn’t care about his life. to him, grail was far more important. if he went back and there was absolutely no chance of survival, he would still do it.
this was far beyond his heroic heart. alden knew this the more time he had spent with grail. he was in love with the male. it was more than physical attraction, but he’d be damned if he didn’t admit that that was sure as hell there. he loved the way the man made him laugh, made him smile. he loved that he could put so much trust in him, whilst the other put his trust in him. there were so many things he’d fallen for and he couldn’t even describe it. now the other thought he was dead -- which was probably for the best.
after all, alden had planned on confessing after this mission was over.
how did they end up like this?
they were outnumbered and surrounded by enemies. they were at the edge of a cliff and there was nowhere to run. this had to be it. this had to be their end. like hell either of them were going down without a fight. there was no question about that.
with the way they fought, it was as if the two were one. there were no words needed to communicate what they needed to do. their movements were perfect synchronization and they did manage to take out a good number of enemies, getting banged up in the process.
things then started turning around fast.
a punch from one of the enemies sent alden sliding across the hard ground and grail was on his own, surrounded. he still fought, but people started pulling guns.
alden knew what was going to happen. the scene around them looked all too familiar. he didn’t know that grail would be there to witness the sight he saw days before and if he knew the truth he’d probably hate alden. after all, the blonde male said nothing of it. it was as if he lied to grail.
he held no regrets as he got up and ran. the adrenaline in his head, clouding his thoughts save for one thing.
“grail!”
alden pushed the older male out of the line of fire and he took each and every hit, straight in the chest. the pain was beyond words that could describe. the impact sent him falling back -- over the cliff’s surface where he plummeted down to the water below.
if there was one thing that he would regret, that would be not telling grail how he truly felt.
it’s been a year and a half since he left that country behind and returned home -- two years since his “death.” there had been no announcements. there were no one who welcomed him back. he kept his arrival and his current status of, well, being alive a secret.
he couldn’t deny that he should’ve told someone that he was alive, but he couldn’t feel at ease. it still felt as if those terrorists were stalking him down. he felt unsafe, perhaps a reaction from his now healed injury.
the people who saved him were people who lived in the country. they hated the war, not because of the destruction happening to their home, but seeing people both foreign and natives lose their lives. they risked it all by taking people in and healing them. alden had been one of them and he stayed till his wound was completely healed. it was almost sad to leave.
“are you sure there wasn’t anyone else around when you found me?” alden asked them. he was shirtless, unbandaged. the wound looked nasty on his otherwise well-sculpted chest.
a woman with tanned skin and dark hair covered up along with most of her skin, gently treated his wounds as she shook her head with a quiet chuckle. how many times has this man asked this? she hadn’t been counting, but if she had, the number would be pretty high. the smile on her painted lips showed no annoyance, however.
“there was no one. you really cared about your friend, hm?” she inquired, chocolate eyes glancing up briefly to his golden ones. her movements did not falter either as she continued to clean the male’s wound.
“he….” what was there to say? grail meant the world to him. he was more than a best friend. he trusted him with his life. if he hadn’t ‘died,’ he’d also trust him with his heart by now. that wasn’t the case, though. a brief look of sadness even crossed his features and his smile showed how he felt. “yeah… i really did. i trusted him more than almost anyone.”
it was impossible to say that he hadn’t changed after that. it was like he was haunted by it day after day, night after night. it haunted alden in his sleep in different ways. he’d see himself shot, followed by grail. they both plummeted to their deaths and despite his sacrifice, grail’s life was lost. there were so many different versions and along with those dreams a haunting pain would ache in his chest, despite it being healed.
alden was no good on his own right now, he had to admit that to himself. yet, he still wouldn’t go to anyone. he still felt as if he were being followed. as if the terrorists were still following him and were going to take him out with any passing second. it was a paranoia he’d never had. however, now that the incident occurred, he felt as if he was losing his own control.
his new life had been odd jobs, moving city to city, no phone, and hardly any contact with people at all. it was hard for him to even trust. before he didn’t care for being alone, but now the company of others gave him that same feeling. a part of him was lost since the moment he woke.
sometimes his visions didn’t give great details of what was going on. they’d be blurred, show certain objects or places.
this was one of those times.
the vision was short. all he could see was a sketchy neighborhood in what was presumed to be somewhere in oklahoma. though the window he could see an indian run casino. and then that was it, it ended.
his hand was gripped tightly around the handle of the coffee mug as he sat in a daze. the aftereffects of the vision slowly started fading away and his perfectly shaped brows furrowed. it’s been a while since he had a vision like that. usually, it would be easier to figure out also.
now it was like something he had when he was a child. had his powers grown weaker with his injury? the very idea caused a pain in his heart. it had taken him so long to get where he was, now he’s almost back to stage one.
there was no use stressing it, however. he wanted to figure it out. alden wouldn’t have a vision like that for no reason. he slid his glasses back on and headed out. oklahoma the destination.
alden stood in front of the building. every detail was the same as his vision, save for one thing. looking in that window, he saw a face he never thought he’d see again.
grail larsen.
he’d changed -- his dark hair grew out, neatly trimmed hairs decorated his chin. however, that smile, whilst tired, was the same. those dark eyes that screamed he was a dangerous man. he had picked up a habit of smoking that alden wasn’t too fond of, but he wouldn’t speak up about that. also, it looked like he’d been playing there for a while. this was it -- this was grail’s life after alden died.
a pang of guilt struck the blonde’s heart briefly, but it didn’t stop his newly found mindset. alden’s decision would probably be something he might regret later. he didn’t care right now, though.
alden needed money to engage with grail and with clever maneuvering, it wasn’t hard to “accidentally” bump into his former partner’s opponent whom was walking away from the table to cash in his winnings. it wasn’t hard to sneak away some of the drunken man’s winnings as he helped gather them and sent him on his way with a kind-sounding, “sorry, sorry~”
soon he found himself at the table and he put on a smile -- one he’d wear only for grail. “closing up already?” he asked as he tried so hard to remain calm and casual. it was one thing to waltz in, but now he was with grail it was almost a struggle. he wanted -- no, needed -- to keep his cool or he could ruin their reunion. he slid the embarrassingly little amount of chips onto the table (no one would play him with this small amount, but that’s what he wasn’t going for). “how about one more game with me before you go?”
grail’s face was something alden would never forget.
IT’S LIVING WITH IT.