082623
i think this might be one of the worst days of my life but every bad day feels like the worst day ever.
couldn't sleep last night, maybe cause it was so hot... got the starbucks pumpkin cold brew before going to work. i was so excited to drink it my hands were shaking when i opened the straw it's serious.
got pissed off at my friend/coworker, i'm sick of doing favors for people and have them disguise it as the other way around.
work was understaffed (as usual), took my friend's task and had to do extra closing work... so sick of fake concern or maybe i'm overthinking
when i left after doing overtime my whole body was shaking cause i was trying not to burst out in tears. also another nail broke, having two broken nails is genuinely crippling like??
was crying and nose started bleeding while i walked to my train. the breeze was a bit too strong, the streets a bit too crowded. i feel like i have co-dependence tendencies it's not good. i have the terrible urge to cut people i hold close to me off, part of me knows its cause i wonder if they will stay. started to hate my outlook on life when riding the train but realized it's how i've survived college years.
i want to be independent again!!! thank you mommy for making me a sandwich and snapping me out of it. today was not all bad. i know i will sleep deeply tonight and listening to julie work on her tumblr is nostalgic. reminds me of jpp mtl trip.