#haliel

[and-so-the-seraphim-sing]

There are constellations in her wings.

[haleyincarnate]

so tell me about your gf. did you start dating through tumblr? what's she like? what do you love about her? did you know you were into girls before her? what's your favourite thing about her?

Oh, fuck. Any question I receive about her just manages to make me smile despite the mood I might be in. 

We first met over Tumblr. Casual, friendly messages through our ask boxes. We would joke around at first, simply spitting off puns and cheesy comments, but as time went on, we started venting to one another. Eventually we exchanged phone numbers and talked a while that way, but simply through text. We never called, never even sent pictures of ourselves for contact icons. Our friendship began to fade into an acquaintanceship, and we didn’t speak for several months.

One particular day however, I remember it perfectly. It was afternoon, right after I had gotten out of school and I had a text from her. Curious, I opened it and read that she really needed to vent and I was one of the people she could trust. Of course, I agreed. We spent the next hour or so texting back and forth, trading stories that tainted our hearts black and rotted them away, until we made a few jokes out of the words we were saying, the hardships we were explaining. And somehow, out of that, we just… Started flirting. I honestly cannot recall who engaged it, but not like I care, right? Ever since then we’ve been talking. Growing closer, and closer. *Laughs quietly* I’m thinking back now, and I remember the first time we heard each others voices. It was the cutest thing, because I have a habit of doing this… Low pitched growl for some reason at the oddest of times? I believe it’s because I’ve trained my voice to do it from the music I listen to, but. Anyway. I’d do that, and I’d make this… Throaty kind of chuckle, and she would just flip out. “Stop it. That is literally the hottest thing. Haley, stop.” And of course, that only made me do it more. Hell, she’d catch me on it when I didn’t realize I was doing it. We’d started Skyping as well, and the times she wouldn’t be paying attention I… I’d just stare at her. She is… By god, is she beautiful. Not to mention she unconsciously bites at her lip and plays with her tongue all the time. Which is a tremendous tease, yet adorable at the same time. We’d sit and laugh for hours on end, and if one of us seemed just an ounce out of character, just a smidgen off from our regular selves, the other would sense it. So we’d sit and discuss our troubles then, and she’d… She just knew how to get me to smile, you know? As if it was the most effortless thing in the universe.

There was one particular night however… She, ah… It was a rough night to say the least, and her emotions were basically slaughtering her from the inside out. I remember it perfectly, every detail of that night; the sound my ceiling fan made as it went around in my room, the sound of her voice all shaky yet strong, the way I was holding my own hand wishing it was hers just so I could reassure her that things were going to be alright, that I was there, that I wasn’t going to let anything hurt her, not anymore. I remember, in the silence that we sat in for a few long minutes, I spoke up and said, “Ariel?” She responded a few moments later with “Yeah?” I smirked to myself, seeing as her voice simply sends a surge of happiness through me, even if her own voice is tinged with sadness. I bit my lip and sighed quietly before saying, “I love you.” On her end, a soft laugh escaped her lips before sniffling and retorting, “I love you too.” Despite the circumstances, that was one of my favorite nights. I couldn’t tell you how terribly I wished I could have kissed her, just so I could drown out the pain she was feeling that night. I mean, damn, you could hear it in her voice and all I wanted to do was hold her. I vowed then and there that I was going to get her out of the prison she lives in at the moment. Her parents don’t allow her to speak with me, seeing as they blocked my number. It’s against their religion for us to be together, so they try their hardest to keep us from being one. Hence why I’m constantly posting about her on my blog, constantly thinking about her. I mean, I’d do that anyway, but even more so with these circumstances. I’ll admit, it’s painful, it’s rough, it’s like living right in the eighth circle of hell not being able to speak with her, but on June 25th of next year, all this time spent waiting will be worth it, for I will finally meet her. She’ll come to live with me, and we will live out our lives as the adventurers we oh so desperately wish to be.

I did know I was into girls before her. I’m into both guys and girls; I fall in love with peoples minds, not there goddamn reproductive organs.

Now, now, telling me to choose my favorite thing about my girlfriend is like telling bibliophile to choose their favorite book. Which, is another question I could not answer seeing as I am one, but my favorite thing about Ariel… Is her. Just her. She is my favorite thing about her, about life, about my existence. When I say she is my everything, I'm not lying. I wouldn't dare lie about something like that. And when I say I love her, I mean it from the very core that is inside of me. 

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Edit: I refuse to erase any part of this response above, seeing as it is complete raw writing and emotions spilled out onto my keyboard about my love for Ariel. However, do know that we are now able to talk to each other because her parents lifted the restrictions.