hi. can I hear more abt the 00 free use au pls. 👀
Of course you can, bc oh boy do I have things to say..
I haven't come up with the right corporate-speak term for it but in short Mallory (repressed homosexual (likely thing for a character played by Ralph Finneas to be)) decided that the 00agents should have “extended duties” in the office to incentivise them to actually show up between missions rather than drop off the face of the earth. And this policy also gives them reason to build relationships with office staff, for…um, morale and transparency's sake. (Okay fine. He was drunk and typed up the policy idea with one hand and now it's too late to pull back.)
The 00s are used to putting their bodies on the line and they all have some kink or mental complex that makes the idea of being passed around MI6’s offices sound like a dream come true. And basically all of them are some flavor of bisexual. The most frequent beneficiaries of the program are the stressed out female office workers who finally get to be eaten out once in a while.
Logistically, office staff are given an extra x minutes long break a week for the specific purpose of fucking the 00s (which most of them spend doing literally anything else bc fuck doing what your boss tells you, and bc the queue outside the 00s offices is always sooo long). Medical assures everyone that the 00s are up to date on their STI-tests and everyone goes “Right, bet” and keep using protection bc workplace safety is improtant👍
James (& Alec) are the oldest of the 00s and there are lots of “jokes” about Bond being considered kind of a pity fuck bc the younger agents are considered far more attractive (and easier to deal with). Don't worry though, he still gets plenty of action. He’s very popular with Q-branch for some reason. Well, they need to take out their frustration with him somehow. Also I'm cementing his canonical preference for married people. My condolences to the spouses of mi6 employees.
Nomi isn't an agent yet in this AU (it’s like 2014 or something timeline what timeline) but she is basically interning at MI6 as an agent in training bc I think she and Moneypenny should be having a forbidden office romance (forbidden since Nomi isn't an agent yet so they aren't allowed to fuck during office hours. This is of course an extremly easy problem to solve if one happens to have an agent on hand).
Mallory at one point had to send out an email to Medical & Q-branch to inform them that they were no longer allowed to threaten the 00s with requirements that they fullfil their new duties in case they failed a training exercise, lost or broke equipment etc because this obviously had the opposite of the intended effect.
In short, productivity is up 7%, employee retention is up 22% and office attendance by the 00agents is up 682%!
