Tip 42: Don’t Headhop
Alright. So this tip has a little writer jargon in it, so first I’m going to explain what headhopping is so this whole thing makes sense.
Headhopping is a phrase editors tend to use when the POV switches in the middle of a scene.
While in a scene, we should not be hearing both what the protagonist and a side character are thinking and feeling. We must be in the head of only one of them, and we must stay there.
If the other character’s emotions are necessary to show, SHOW THEM. But don’t tell us from their perspective.
An example:
Lucy watched the hot man from across the bar. What she wouldn’t do to dance with him tonight . . . He met her eyes. Wow. That girl’s pretty hot. I bet she’ll dance with me. He went over to flirt.
This starts from Lucy’s perspective and switches to the man’s perspective.
DON’T DO THIS.
Instead:
Lucy watched the hot man from across the bar. What she wouldn’t do to dance with him tonight. Shoot, he saw me . . . She tried to look away nonchalantly, slowly bringing her gaze back to his. He was still staring. She flashed a smile, hoping she didn’t seem too awkward. He came over, and she was almost certain he was flirting when he introduced himself.