You, a sweet, simple maid for him up in a frenzy. His impulse to love as the same instinct to kill. All found in you, a simple maid. That maybe isn’t so simple…
Hello friendos✨, I got this lovely request for protective Alucard x maid!reader from @queenofwerewolves 💖 I hope it’s what you pictured 🙈 I tried to go with a sweet flow mostly. But Alucard gives me such goth yearner vibes😩😩 I do truly love and adore this man in all his forms 💖 anyways have fun 🌚✨♥️
Wordcount: 3k
Warnings: fluff, a tiny bit suggestive at one part, a bit angst for the plot but not heavy with a cute twist!
It was the hum that filled the halls that made this whole manor feel more lived in than it actually was. It sounded happier than Walter's brooding and yet smoother than Seras attempt to adorably but clumsily lighten the mood. And by far more delighted than Integra's cold smoke from her cigar. You are the heart of this organization now. Not by the pure purpose it was for, this kind of heart was Sir Integra herself, but you? You were the heart of the place, a kind distraction to indulge in with a smile on your lips even when you just dusted the next shelf of those endless rooms. Although you never stepped into the basement, not that you were scared of that red-coated monster down there—it was charming even with bared teeth. It was more the fact that you got the instruction not to, not when you were not told to. After all, it was Alucard's chambers, his sanctuary in this whole building; everyone accepted that. It had always been treated like this. No one enters when not asked to. When there was no need to. Yet the vampire waited, plagued by this scent of you. Not just your blood, but this also drew him in. Your blood smelled like sweet copper; he was sure it would run down his throat with a pleasant warmth, and just maybe, with a delicate little whimper, it would leave you. But this was optional. The vampire had saved you; it was not calculated and more of a coincidence, but still. And since then you became the maid.
You helped Walter around the Hellsing manor, and since you did a good job and you always talked about how you don't really know where to go now, he got a heart and asked Integra if you could officially become a part of the organization. And the best part of all of that? Since that moment the tall vampire caught you in his long arms, you weren't just (Y/N); you filled this place out. Because ever since you became part of Hellsing, you were known to be the 'Little Requiem.' It sounded soft, but for Alucard it was utterly true. You jumped from the death's edge just because of him, and yet you wielded a calmness he didn't feel in centuries. As Walter was the Angel of Death, you would be known as Little Requiem; enemies would not need to know that your ultimate was perhaps to aggressively clean the tile floor as you bit your tongue, but still you were a member now.
And right now that crimson-eyed vampire watched you from the shadows. It calmed him, even when you did mundane things. He caught himself loitering around more than actually needed. It was a little miracle, even to himself. You were too soft on the edges, a sweet thing thrown into a gray world, and you tried to survive. And no matter how clumsy or unimportant you thought you were, you survived. Your story had not been told to you; it was still to come, and that ancient creature felt it. Alucard felt it the moment he caught you. But how had this happened?
It was when you were running out of the building, ghouls behind you, and it was a slaughter. You already worked as a maid in an office building as you stumbled out in pure panic. Your lung was burning, and your heart hammered against your rib. The worst? You could not run out of the building; you were cornered by the stairs up the high tower onto the roof. But after you had blocked the door, oh, what you found there was a vampire who actually controlled the mindless monsters.
"Look at that, a shy little mouse made it to the top. Look at you; your skirts are soaked in red. That's my work, sweetheart." The vampire chuckled, flashing wild eyes towards you. When you turned your head to the door again, it rattled, but the ghouls didn't break through yet. It was like choosing between plague or cholera, death in any case. Even your lower lip trembled, too stunned to speak when the undead creature approached you.
"Come on, say thank you and appreciate my work. I grant you even something; after all, you made it up here. A simple, little maid. You would be such a great afternoon snack. Your blood, it smells tempting." He loved to hear himself talk and loved to make you afraid so your blood ran cold as you stepped back.
"You-you killed everyone else inside with those ghouls," your voice thin and uncertain. Like a deer in panic caged on top of a roof. "Didn't I tell you to thank me?" he questioned, but before he could grab your throat, you stepped back to the edge of the roof. There were not many options left for you. You didn't want to get torn off limb by limb and eaten by mindless ghouls, and yet when you were trembling, you had enough of men calling you around and wanting to grope you. Enough of simply enduring. You were a maid, and people that worked here treated you as an object. Pretty enough to tease, unworthy enough to push around. Just like that vampiric guy now.
So when you only got two options in how to die, you would chose at least your own end. So your feet stepped closer to the ede of the building, shaky and unsteady. But before the vampire could reach you, you jumped. Anything would be better than that. You closed your eyes, you did not even scream. Curled like a ball in yourself as you fell. But what you felt, wasn't the pain of the asphalt beneath you, it was a steady secure grip. "Oh, let's see what we have here." a dark velvety voice like smoke wrapped in steel had caught you.
"A bird that fell out of it's cage?" that voice asked you. You still had closed your eyes shut. Your breath ragged. And for a moment it was silent as if the ghouls in the building never existed, no soul to hear. Not even that very man who caught you. You opened your eyes, just to see two crimson orbs looking at you. Your maid headpiece was ascew as you blinked up at him. Black silky hair across his face. "Your're startled, little maid. Did it scare you much that you not died? You're way too lovely to rot away on a stree like that." just after he said that you found your voice to speak.
"There is a vampire on the rooftop, I-I didn't really see another option. I don't think that I could fight him with feather duster." you meant a bit dry and innocent in your voice but at least you opened your mouth. It was followed by a dark laughter of him. "A feather duster? You got wit, my dear. But today is not the day you die. The bird just flew to a different cage." you just hummed as if you knew what he was talking about. Still the shock had set in your bones.
And since that...you became part of Hellsing. He killed the vampire and those ghouls with ease. You ended up being covered in blood because you slipped on the ground. A sweet, clumsy maid he did not think he would encounter but did anyway. And well, this was the first day you actually felt safe around a man. Even when he was known to be a ruthless killer. But Alucard was the one who caught you, who held you secure when no one else did. Maybe the Hellsing manor was your new cage. But the door of that cage was wide enough open for you to go... Yet there was no reason to. For the first time you felt like you would matter more as a maid than ever.
And you did good; Walter actually was very pleased with your work. He praised you like a grandpa would praise his granddaughter.
But this man also noticed how Alucard was a lingering shadow in your presence, even when you didn't notice it. The big predator was watching you when you hummed and cleaned the kitchen counter. As you made some tea ready for Sir Integra. The way you scrubbed the floor on your knees. Maybe the maid dress was sometimes a bit too perfect for your shape. Because when he was watching you on your knees trying so eagerly to scrub a stubborn spot away, he saw how your hair fell in your face. How you sighed so sweetly in frustration and had this little scowl. He was sure he could deepen that cute scowl further, just differently. He would brush the hair out of your face with gentle fingers as you would sit between his long legs. But Alucard was a gentleman, a monster but still a gentleman. He suppressed thoughts that he considered as indulgence—at least he tried to. Even when you didn't make it easy for him.
Although that vampire grew very protective toward you, especially when Pip was around. Pip was that kind of guy; he just flirted out of fun too, nothing really serious with you. He just liked to make women feel good about themselves. His flirting was never crude. Something like:"Go on mon chou, I believe when you scrub longer, the floor will remember that pretty face." Yet Alucard was the first one to step into it before you could reply with a laugh to wave it off. You always did that when someone was nice to you and openly appreciative. You weren't used to that.
That's when his imposing figure walked out of the wall. "Oh, but perhaps not your rough one. Let the little requiem do her duty." His voice was smooth, but the underlying meaning was clear.
"I was just making sure the women in this household feel appreciated, that's all, right, mon chou?" Pip laughed it off, tipping his hat before you finally decided to rise up to your feet. Alucard glided towards you. A hand stretched out for you to take it. You looked up at him with wide eyes and this little smile before you took it. "Thank you, Alucard."
"Not for that, my sweet," he answered, standing tall behind you. "I do feel very appreciated, sir. But perhaps Seras also could need quite the attention. She likes you even when she is denying it," you meant to him, giving an obvious wink to him before Pip went his way.
"Tell me, my dear. When do you consider coming to my chambers?" he asked you, crimson eyes looking down while you wanted to take the broom, a bit startled as you turned around as he asked this question. "Ehm- eh,your chambers? I was told not to go there. Not when not told," sweet, little you told him as you tilted your head so endearing.
That made the monster chuckle, deep and rich, as he leaned in, just a fraction. Close enough to smell you, but not to unsettle you. "You're told now, my dear. A dark space could use some light." This offer was genuine, not for his indulgence. You were too good for that, a balm to his old soul. A light that filled the room with pleasant warmth. "I mean, I could probably dust off the coffin?" you asked back then. "You could, although I believe your company would be more than enough," he reassured you. When you finally got what he meant. He wanted you to come down to the basement. To fill his room with your sweetness. "You won't bite me, will you?" you chuckled, although there was this glint in your pretty orbs.
You were aware of his nature. Because you have seen it in other vampires.
"I wouldn't sip a single drop when you wouldn't want that. You know me better, darling." He brushed a strand of hair out of your face. His hands lingered on the side of your face, just a moment longer than needed. "I know, I was just making sure. I mean, it's mysterious I get to see the basement," you meant, looking a bit excited. You brought away the stuff for cleaning before you indeed landed in the basement.
It was dark, with faint traces of wine and blood that mingled in the air. Yet that protective aura from him overwhelmed anything else.
"Do you have any idea what you do to me?" This question was spoken in a gentle tone. Not accusing or stating with a lust he couldn't control. He caught you in his arms, a simple maid. Now you sit here still in that same maid dress. Eyes big as saucers. You had given your life to people who don't deserve it before. You ran through blood and gore, and on that very rooftop made your own decision for the very first time. And you had not complained once. You took life like it was. It tried to break you? You tried to dust it away. He could see it. The way when insecure thoughts overcome you with that frown on your face. It was picturing true humanity in its simplicity he yearned for. You were not searching for death because life was unbearable. You had searched for it as an embrace because your chances weren't fair. And it did something to that man who believed humanity was still a gift. Even when not everyone deserved it. A reason more to protect you.
"Hm? I mean, I cleaned your coat. I hope it was ok. Likewise, I never really had to wash anything out of leather like this. Especially when the blood was dripping down the -" he cut you off. Although he still had in mind how you struggled to clean his red coat. It was endearing. "You cleaned it well; you wiped away every bloody trace," he ended it for you before he turned around to you. Two fingers under your chin. "What I mean is, you're simple. I know people don't like to hear it. I just find myself fascinated by the fact you keep on trying. How you really want to use every ounce of your life, even when you could not always decide on your own. But that changed, didn't it?" He explained it then to you and felt your pulse quicken. You swallowed. No one ever said simple and made it a compliment. "I was always simple, the maid who cleaned and was invisible when not worth being seen," you meant then, your voice dropped a bit because you remembered how life was before you came into this manor.
"You're seen, my dear. I see your joy when Seras agrees to go shopping with you even when it's night. I see your distress when Walter points out a minor mistake, when you think you're not good enough. Furthermore, I see the heavy thoughts when you think no one is watching." Alucard confessed as his thumb traced your jaw. You were insecure in what to think right now. He was an undying being, so ancient by now. Why would someone like that see you?
"And why do you see it? Like everyone wants something. As if there was something promised about what to get out of it. What do you get out of it?" This question nearly hurt him, that the world made you believe it wasn't so easy like this. He saved you; he would save you a thousand times. You were, after all, his little requiem. That fragile, little bird he put in another cage, and he still would let it fly out when it wanted.
Alucard then got down on one knee, simply because he wanted to be at face height with you. "Because it's precious. Humanity is not so common as you think. Not in this raw, beautiful you have. Humanity can be ugly; it can be about surviving. Yet you soften the hardships. And it delights me, the light you bring into this room, into my heart, it delights me. That sweet smile you have when I come back from a mission delights me. You're precious, my dear. I would protect that as long as I live." You looked at him then, his features so handsome, softened now for your gaze. His smooth voice is gentle in your ears. His aura was all demanding, yet with you he let it be a tiny bit softer. He wanted to seem inviting the same way you were to him. "That's probably the most romantic thing someone ever said to me. Usually guys go over text with : love you, babe." You tried to lighten your own mood with a wet chuckle because you had small, clear tears in your eyes.
"The people lost the taste for telling someone what they feel. You got me up in a frenzy, my dear. It's not only your blood, even when you smell divine. It's not only that the way you look makes you prey to me. Not only that, but it's that pretty mind of yours that keeps me." That's when you leaned into him, letting him cup your cheek. "I like your presence; sometimes I can feel it in the shadow. Even when I pretend no one would be there. It's oddly comfortable," you confessed quietly as you pressed your cheek into his palm. "I don't know if I am ready for a vampire boyfriend so suddenly. But I would like to let this unfold," you added then, soft and sweet, being a bit insecure. Then he smirked. The heavy moment was over. He finally got the maid, who cleaned his coat so thoroughly, by a thread. "Then we let it unfold. Let the impulse to love be like the instinct to kill. You will see, little maid." Alucard said before he pressed a cold kiss on your forehead. It was the man that saved you, and in the end the monster who does not only want a sweet maid as prey but also to love and keep her safe from everything else....
WARNING - As a victim I was going through a rough day when I started this. I looked up when SA awareness month was thinking it was this month but it's fine. Close enough if you will haha. April is nearly here and it'll be Sexual assault Awareness Month. April is also my birthday month so there's quite a bit of angst in the air with me right now.
The story includes the talk of sexual assault and abuse so please be aware. To all the fellow victims out there hello, I see you and I am with you.
Check out my other socials and follow if you want and I'm open for commissions so if you are interested in that please dm or comment. (PayPal & Cashapp preferred. I'm open to other payment methods if you prefer them but we'll have to talk about it. Currently working on getting something set up for someone else but since I'm kinda new to everything you'll have to be patient with me. ^^`
👇🏾 Story Continues Down Below 👇🏾
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It's one of those days.
One of those fucking days.
The days were his past, the long and vast pit of it plagued his mind. He's in the void, the one that's been hovering over him the the last couple of decades. The one that had formed directly after the Turks.
He remembers no matter how many peoples he's met, no matter how many he's lost or torn up with his very own teeth and claws… nothing ever seemed to actually get rid of his original past.
Even when he was joking, laughing, cackling it always lingered whether he wanted it to or not even if the distractions he had around him now seemed to quiet them from time to time it was still other fucking hell.
They whispered to him, voices much like the one he held so many years ago. Voices that sounded like what he used to, telling him that it was his fault even if he tried to avoid it. Telling him that if he had been stronger back then he wouldn't have to suffer with the thoughts he was plagued with now, that sure it wasn't his fault, not necessarily, but what if he hadn't of been cursed into that world… hadn't of been created at all. If it wasn't that voice it was all the others, the souls of those that he had been made into consuming who had now… practically been able to see his life, who had been forced into watching his pain just as much as he was.
They whispered, voices echoing in the shadows of his subconscious and he watched them do so with dead eyes.
And if it wasn't the whispers, the gasps, the pained and sorrowful looks he received from the dead of those following him it was himself.
At times, when there was nothing else but him, the darkness and that… child, Alucard was faced with being glared at, yelled and cursed at by them for not giving them the strength he now had and he listened… He did so until they gripped at the shirt they were wearing which was dirty, covered in muck and blood and fluids he rather wouldn't think of but what privilege did he have for such a wish?
All he could do was listen to them because after so many years he's come to the understanding that they never had anyone to do such with. He had been forced to live the life he lived now, yes he had cursed God much like this child was cursing him now and had been created into what he is now but Alucard at times wondered just how… his life could have been if none of it happened at all.
And he was pissed because after all these years it was simply too, fucking late.
Even so, when they crumbled to their knees in a ball of tears… shaking, hiccuping, Alucard kneeled carefully before them.
They were so small, so dirty… filthy and yet Alucard couldn't find himself to judge them as he had so cruelly done many, many times now. He couldn't look down on them for being what he was, small and weak and he looks at them with his crimson eyes like the shadow of a wolf in darkness.
His body could still feel pain, just not as it didn't before he turned. The touches always seemed to linger like ghost touching and caressing him, gripping and squeezing him even when he knew no one else was touching him and at times… he almost seemed to trick himself into telling him he enjoyed it.
After all who would he be now if he had never ran into the great and famous Ottoman Ruler Sultan Murad ll? The shit stain who had seemed to plague his mind enough to remind him of his origins even after all this fucking time that has passed. Alucard wouldn't be Alucard… if it hadn't been for him… right?
He was losing his mind. He's been doing so for so long now.
At times his body didn't even feel like his own which was probably why he felt a bit different every time he had the time and chance to choose another. At times such occurrences almost seemed to make him feel better until someone whispered his name, or caressed his body in a way that always seemed to spark his memory in the worst of ways.
He had never touched himself with those memories on his mind, it made him feel sick and even sicker when he seemed to… wish that he could. Sometimes a heat seemed to boil in his gut and after so many years of using his body for many things he had learned the difference between having actual attraction to someone but even that seemed to make things worse at times.
Knowing he wanted to be touched, needed to be by someone, anyone who actually gave a fuck about him versus knowing that haunting touch of that horrid man who only did so for sick pleasure seemed to drive him into an even deeper whole than he already was in. He's had his lovers, the ones he deemed worthy enough to sleep and bed with but something always lingered and it was starting to feel like something that he would never be able to actually get rid of.
It makes him dread his existence, almost as if he thought that maybe he shouldn't have tested the old bag of shit that they called God. Almost, because even with how empty he felt… he was still rather stubborn.
It was like pulling at himself and a part of him was tempted at the very idea as he continued to watch that small child cry and sob before him. Distantly it made him think of some small animal pleading to some beast, like a deer in the hold of a wolf. There was fear, the smell of blood and ash in the air around them and yet as they sat here together in this void there also seemed to be a sense of understanding. Even wolves could be weak, even deer could be strong, nothing seemed to make sense but that…it did.
Alucard found himself coming to a bit of a conclusion of some sort as the voices of the dead whispered to them and for the first time in a long, long time they seemed to actually make sense.
He was broken.
So much so that not only had the spirits around him spilled their blood but he had too and it rained over them as well as himself.
He was broken but not alone as he sits here with the many pieces of himself and fragments of humanity.
‘W-Why? Huh?! Why did it have to be like this?! Why did it have to be me!..’ They bawled like the child that they were and always would be because while they were both Alucard they had enough time to become… their own entity as well.
Crimson eyes stay on them before slowly falling shut and as darkness seems to color his own vision now Alucard reaches out slowly to the child, raising his hands and leading them over before taking hold of them.
They are a lot smaller than he is now and it's honestly rather interesting seeing such a difference. Alucard almost couldn't believe that he used to be so small considering how he presented himself to others now. He feels them jump under the light touch and he briefly wonders if even that hurts and he thinks to pull his hands away but then slowly, they lift their head and for the first time in this moment between the two of them, they look up at him, their eyes shining with tears and Alucard hadn't realized it until now but his also seemed… wet.
He's… crying with them?
He's crying with them.
He hadn't felt like he'd been able to do such a thing after everything, after so many years, he couldn't even remember the last time he's even felt the itch to let out tears and yet here he was now as those usually smug and cocky eyes seemed to water.
He takes hold of them though he doesn't have to hold hard as they immediately shuffle closer now as if searching for the comfort they've never been given and who was Alucard to deny them of such right now of all times. It's like they are both deer now or both wolves with Alucard being the buck or leader of the other now, here to comfort them much like a mother or father would do for a sobbing child that they loved and cared for.
Alucard finds himself with them moving in and clinging to him and his cloak- his garbs that were all black just like the shadows that created his form. They hold him tight, nails digging into what they could and as Alucard sits back on his haunches his moves one arm to slip under their bottom and pull them even closer while his other hand moves to cradle their head, his large hand tangling in messy, inky black hair. The sob they let out at being held so close after all this time is enough to send the mightiest shivers rushing up Alucard’s spine as he clutches them just a bit tighter.
And who would he be to let them cry alone while they were literally in his arms now? So of course, his own eyes look up to the darkness like clouds over them and as tears well up in his own eyes they slide shut slowly. Tears roll down his own cheeks as he holds them, as they sob ugily into his shoulder, wetting the fabric that seemed to cling to Alucard's body and he doesn't care because being wet with tears was a lot better than being wet with other things right now… The child shakes violently, soft cries turning louder and louder, turning into screaming, kicking and hitting as they seem to become overwhelmed with everything they've been cursed into living with within him and Alucard only seemed to soften, hugging them like he couldn't imagine letting go because he couldn't feel the pain of their little punches and kicks but he could feel the pain that threatened to overwhelm him if he let them go now, to break him if he loosened his grip even the tiniest bit.
After everything, this felt like nothing.
He could handle this reaction because no one would understand them but him, either one of them.
It takes a moment, a few minutes maybe or it could have been a couple hours, Alucard at times could lose track of time in this place not that time seemed to matter in any way to him any more. Either way, the child grows quiet, sniffling and rubbing their face viscously into his chest in pain and angst but even though it hurts, everything hurts, they do seem to like being in his arms and held by him like the small child they are. There's nothing he or they could do after all this time.
At least, nothing when it came to regaining the innocence that was lost to them, stolen from them but… maybe, a sense of peace could be fromed. Even just a little if…
He found him.
…
There, hidden in the crowd shaking like the scared little dog he was.
And that's exactly how he should feel.
Alucard slowly opens his eyes once more and turns his gaze in the direction of the piece of shit and he doesn't seem to be the only one as the child lifts their head slowly. Their eyebrows knitted together as an expression on pure rage slowly but surely forms on their lips and once fully there they also turn their gaze to follow Alucard's.
There he was, the filthy bastard. The shadows and other spirits seeming to flicker and move aside to expose him more to the two and as if he can smell the animosity that suddenly fills the air he perks and comes face to face with the crowd and Alucard in particular. The child seems to reel their teeth back like a rabid dog, fangs sparkling even in such darkness and Alucard feels himself make a similar grimace but there's a sadistic look to his that forms as it always did when he was presented with these moments. That sadistic look that seemed to show up when he was fighting on the battlefield though the idea of controlling himself is nowhere in sight like it would be if he was killing ghouls usually. It's bitter. There's unbridled rage just seeing the man, a taste of something similar to oil of his tongue like bile and when Alucard moves to get to his feet he continues to hold the child but now with his one arm under them as he stands to his full height.
Immediately Sultan attempts to run, jerking in order to gather himself only to crash to the groud when a hand grabs his ankle roughly.
It's a phantom hand and not one of Alucard's own per se but one of a spirit in the mass group around them and it dawns on Alucard that they are also… just as furious.
Sure, many had been beasts who were killed by Alucard because they had to be but those who held similar trauma seemed moved by these things. Seemed just as angry as Alucard was and the child, and for what reasons in particular he wasn't sure but after spending so many years with so many souls only to just now learn them for who they were Alucard knew that he wasn't alone in more than one way as well. There were fellow victims in the group, those who had been so viciously abused by Sultan or by someone who held just as dirty of a soul as his and Alucard could hear their whispers, their words of how he should be punished far worst than simply living here with the rest of them.
To put it simply. Many wanted to see him be punished like the vile, disgusting creature that he is.
To be punished like a bad dog, face justice like he was meant to.
That he should be whipped, strung up, raped just as the others had been and Alucard almost felt better at such words as they grew louder and louder, chanting, hisses and snarls filling the air. Even if some of these spirits had their own reasons for feeling such ways one way or another they all wanted him gone. They didn't want to have to share this same space with a creature like Sultan Murad ll and who was Alucard to make them, who was he to allow this man to love even amongst this place without facing the pain that he had caused upon others.
Alucard could be rather forgiving however,
He would never forgive this man.
He couldn't forgive this man.
Wouldn't even dream of it.
And so he takes a step, then another and Sultan begins to screech, already begging, pleading for the life that no longer belonged to him… doing so much crying much like Alucard had done all those years ago, over and over again as he repeatedly cried and begged and pleaded. Seeing such a weak display made him snarl, the least Sultan could do was take it like a man. Something he had said many times himself while he was buried in Alucard's small and tormented body and had he ever had mercy?
No. He hadn't.
So who would Alucard before to have any on him?
When he had killed the man Alucard hated the fact that he didn't want him to just die and be blessed with finding himself at the gates at hell so instead bitterly consumed his blood, his sport, his soul just to have him here and just to torment the man just like he had for many others.
To welcome him to hell while also showing him it in all it's best aspects.
The spirits clung to the fat bastard as he tried kicking, tried fighting off the hands that seemed to come from nowhere and everywhere at the same time, they dug into his skin and ripped at his clothes until he was just as small and naked and scared as Alucard himself had been and as the great No Life King continued to approach like a giant trailing through a sea of claws and hissing, those spirits made room for him, stepping aside obediently as Alucard made slow steps. Said steps that some how rung out louder that the animalistic sounds around then, even louder then Sultan's screaming which only seemed to get louder as he fought and kicked only to now find himself naked like some wet dog that had been caught in the rain. He tries scooting away, his ass rubbing against the dark floor and his legs kicking and once he's cornered, backed up to a wall like some little bitch, Alucard pauses when he seems to catch the whiff of piss.
Did he…
Alucard suddenly snorts, the wild look in his eyes only growing crazier as he finds himself moving his free hand up to his mouth as if to snuff off his own laughter.
Did Sultan Murad ll fucking piss himself out of pure fear? How precious, of course he did Alucard remembers the smell as disgusting as it is.
How could he not after all the time the man had seemed to find humor in pissing of him after he'd cum in him, after he had his fill of Alucard's young body. The laugh that fills the air is wild, a loud cackle that rung out and filled the air.
“ARE YOU SERIOUS?” Alucard now speaks and the child in his arms jumps a little thought they look at him with sparkling eyes almost as if in awe at that reaction.
“After all this time you can't even fight back?! You can't even bother to get to your feet?!” He giggles as all eyes turn on him and then back to the man who seemed to be shaking in a pool of his own piss. Hell, Alucard hadn't even been aware that the spirits even could piss themselves after dying and yet here he was being proven wrong in the faces of so many. “How pathetic.. You've even allowed yourself to be stripped like some corner whore.” He says, his voice dripping with venom as he continues to storm forward and a few shadows shift and stir behind him, revealing themselves as being his dogs. The shadows that he used so often when it came to killing those who truly deserve it and to say the least, they were starving. Itching the sink whatever teeth and limbs that they could into the man and Alucard could feel them waiting for his permission.
“Should I allow you to be treated like one too? To be raped and used from every orfis like they are?” He asks with a voice so hauntingly chilling that the room feels icy on impact.
I-I'm so sorry.. I never..
Sultan's voice suddenly cries out and Alucard finishes crossing the space between them with a few sudden and big steps which literally made the man yelp and try to squeeze himself into a ball as if he'd be granted access to hide. But no, not here, never here. He deserved to be seen, to be judge, ostracized like the filth that he was and if Alastor was the judge than he would judge this made and he was justice so of course he wouldn't offer him the mercy that he begs for now.
He even tries to meet Alucard before Alucard gets to him as some weak, pitiful attempt at being heard out, listened to and when Alucard stands right before him the man scrambled to his hands in knees.
F-Forgive me! Please forgive me.
Sultan Murad ll says while fucking sobbing, even attempting to move and kiss at Alucard's feet. He plants one and shakily looks up to Alucard to see it's affect on to be faced with… nothing. Not even the smile which had been there a moment ago as sharp, crimson eyes looks down at him like shit on the side of the street.
Quickly the man moves down to give another kiss only to gasp and a foot connects harshly with his jaw, kicking hard enough to knock him back on his ass and make his head spin. His vision is blurred for a second and there's a ringing in his ears and it takes him a minute to realize that he was bleeding everywhere from his nose which was fractured. It's like they weren't even dead. He hadn't expected to be able to feel such pain in the afterlife and now after quite literally getting a taste the man breathes quickly and heavily, cupping his hands under his chin to uselessly try and catch the red crimson which was leaking from him like a faucet. His hands shaking horribly as he slowly looks up and meets Alucard's vicious gaze.
“Don't touch me. You are the very last people I want touching me and you… know that.” Alucard says with a snarl as he now takes the time to lean down and place the child on the floor and understandably so, they hide behind Alucard for protection, not that they actually had anything to fear. They hid but not so much so that they couldn't see.
They wanted to see the show too after all.
“Those dirty lips, those filthy lips and you think that I want them on me after everything I've gone through thanks to you?” He hisses and the only reason he doesn't lunge at the man himself is because he doesn't need to, he had all these eyes around them right now, if you didn't tear him apart than someone else surely would.
“I wouldn't even drink your blood if it was the last bit on this shit fucking rock we call Earth. Don't. Touch. Me.”
He wants to grab him and throw him so hard on the group that his body would basically burst open with broken bones and limbs on impact but Alucard felt done with this trash, this waste of a human soul. And so, he simply scoffs, moving to turn away, gathering that small child in his arms once more and they happily allow him with a little smile forming on their face. Just seeing this was enough to calm them, was enough to give them vengeance, just seeing this man… practically smelling his fear in the air was enough to heal something deep within them.
Alucard however…
Didn't seem to change as he pulls them up and allows them to look over his shoulder at the view, holding them closely and even rubbing their back a little. And with a hum and a short whistle from his lips the spirits around them seem to suddenly jumping at the man startling with the hellhounds who didn't waste any time rushing forward, hungry.
Jaws snap down everywhere they can, fangs and claws tearing into flesh and spilling blood as Sultan screams in agony.
He probably had thought this wouldn't be painful but it was anything but as the hounds tossed him to the ground, and they cries and pleads only seem to continue. They filled the air like music and when the other spirits joined in, rushing to see just what they could get their hands on and tear into, Alucard hums.
There is a bit of satisfaction.
Especially when the man is faced with not just being torn apart but groped at as well, touched fondled.
Alucard wouldn't stop them and as his younger self watches with wide eyes he continues to hold them close as if they were his own child, one he created and to be honest… they basically were. He formed them every day, had been in this space with them alone for so many long and painful years.
No one knew them like he did.
And no one would know him as much as them.
Which was perfectly fine. Screams soon turn to cries, crimson on the floor soon finds itself blending in with semen, cum as the man was used but not only those starving spirits but the hellhounds too. Over and over again like some whore, some slut, just like he had done to so many others.
There's a sense of peace that fills the air over all the sobbing, the crying, the laughing and Alucard finds himself feeling even more so introspective then he had originally. Coming to the conclusion that even this didn't feel like enough to pay for it all.
However, the child in his arms seemed to brighten, shining like a start as they watched this show. It's the brightest Alucard has ever seen them, it's such a pure look that he never thought he'd be able to see in this world and it's warm. So warm, like the shining sun and before Alucard can stop himself he falls to his knees, clutching the child tighter now and burying his head in his shoulder.
The child squeaks and looks at him carefully and he's shaking, it clicks now that Alucard has finally broken, shedding tears from those beautiful crimson eyes of his and they still still for a moment but a soft smile forms on their lips.
Slowly, gently, they move to wrap their own arms around him now, hugging him close and Alucard sobs under the touch.
He's been to this place so many times now and never has he felt like this, never had everything just made… sense, and it was overwhelming having spent so many years with this pain. Trying to hold on to it and deal with it on his own but the thing was that Alucard was anything but alone and they were with him as much as he was with them and no matter how much he tries to ignore them, avoid them, hate them.
And Alucard found himself very grateful for them as he continues to let out tears that had been trapped in him for so, so long and they let him with a smile on their face.
“Thank you.”
They whisper now against Alucard while gently rubbing his back now much like he had done with him as he clung to them like a child would with their favorite toy.
It's like he had finally felt something new, different from what he's been stuck with filling for all this time and he tried to handle such an overload of emotions but simply couldn't.
“Thank… you.”
Alucard says back now while nosing at them, shaking a little less now as they rubbed them and held him close. Never having cried over all of this was one thing but having someone to cry with? Was definitely another.
It's relieving.
Like popping a balloon full of water, and as blood spills behind them Alucard allows himself to but wash with every emotion. And as he continues to cry he feels a wave of euphoria knowing that he's suddenly found a better reason to continue this life of his.
When he pulls back from the void he finds you next to him. Resting calmly against his shoulder, sleeping soundly it seemed. You had been working with him enough now that you two had built a bound and sometimes, you definitely tested your luck and this was definitely one of those times. A tear falls from his eyes, then another because why… are you here? Greeting him after he just took such a journey within himself.
You were so little next to him, so… sweet and kind and Alucard would be lying if he said that he didn't find himself fond of you.
Your bright eyes, and soft lips, smooth skin.. and with such beauty you were also… kind. So caring and loving and it suddenly makes sense as the why you're also here with him right now, practically tucked into his cloak. You must've worried for him. When the two of you met you seemed to nervous, so hesitant and as… cute as it was it was clear you tended to keep a distance from him so.. being here with him now, had to mean you weren't scared enough not to lay and take a nap right next to him and that makes him… smile a little.
He looks down at you for a moment, admiring your lashes and soft cheeks and the way you chest rose and fell slowly and without much other thought he wipes his eyes of their tears and slowly, carefully leans down to place a soft kiss to your forehead. His lips were soft, careful, against her warm skin and he could easily pick up on her natural scent. When he pulls back you stir a little, just a tiny bit and Alucard chuckles, moving his arm in a way for it to slip around you easier and pull you even closer. He goes back to resting his head, leaning it back to look up at the ceiling before slowly letting them fall shut and for the first time in a long time his heart felt…
The vampire rendered an odd feeling every time you flashed your eyes over a map. Every time you spoke about claiming something. What is when you and a life before you reminded him on a long forgotten story of a time when he breathed real air in a human body?
Hello my friendos ✨🤌🏻 we’re back with another Alucard request from a dear anon. I am honest this was not so easy to write. But I liked the concept and the idea a lot 💪🏻♥️ so everyone who actually likes maybe some Ottoman Empire vibes or low key (perhaps not correct) historical vibes in Alucards story is right here. We got a kind of enemies to lovers tension here and how much he holds onto his own past 🥹🥹♥️
Wordcount: 4,8k
Warnings: a bit angst especially in the end, low key historical vibes, tragedy
It was a gray day, like always in the last weeks. Even when the sun decided to shine through, thick gray clouds covered it; often it rained, not that it ever disturbed you. The rain was a constant calm in your mind. It was making you more efficient, at least you thought so. Since the whole situation overall was anything but ideal with the Major. It complicated things. Not just for society but for you. You wanted the Hellsing Organization to be more than simply the strongest organization to fight the paranormal evil. When you could find more creatures like the one in the basement of your own home...this could bring things to move. Yet your older sister Integra was the head of it. Not that you ever envied her, no. But sometimes you felt a bit dismissed in your suggestions to make it bigger. Integra had no interest in collecting monsters, no interest in trying to bargain with them. Because Alucard was no bargain, he was loyal to his master, who was Integra. And you could understand her point, yet the urge to reach out and create more was there.
You knew Alucard since you were small, always that crimson shadow that was watching over you and your sister. Even when you sometimes had the feeling he would try to avoid you. Not always and not on every occasion. But mostly in moments when you actually were going through plans. When you explained what needs to be done. Always then the charming vampire would find a way to try to move the strategy or to fully dismiss your idea. Even when you didn't really see a dislike in his blood-red eyes. You never asked him why; you simply decided, perhaps because of your sister, he just tried to serve in her will.
The true reason was a different...
Right the moment you wanted to take a sip from your tea, you were taken to a sudden meeting. Everyone was there, every man who had worked for your father and now for Integra. Your sister, Seras, Walter, and of course the tall vampire himself. Standing imposingly next to your sister. When you entered the room, the air seemed to change. Your face was kind; you always were, yet the decisions you made made people wonder and look twice. Integra absolutely knew why you were so precious to the organization, even when your eagerness sometimes was a bit too much. An urgent mission was rising. A well-calculated unknown vampire would be expected, sent by the Major; they could gather that much intel for now. The problem was not only the vampire and the ghouls. It was Iscariot. They claimed the way to that point. Wanting to erase it themselves.
After you've been told the situation, it was the Integra who got the word.
"I need you to go with Alucard. Besides the fact that the Vatican is making more problems than we need, we can't afford to spill unnecessary blood. We need diplomacy."
"Diplomacy? And this is where you think I can pull that?" you asked her, not to mock, more like to make sure. "What I think is you do what is needed. And for any cases you've got Alucard with you, you'll need him when you actually make it through their barrier. He will fight off the vampire." Integra added before adjusting her glasses as she looked stern. Then your eyes drifted to Alucard. A smirk on his lips as he tilted his head. "It's been ages, hasn't it? We actually both go into a field." He said it like it was some casual dinner you would need to go to. But you heard the slight edge. When he wouldn't need to, he wouldn't, not with you. "Delighted I see. Anyway, you're there for my safety. Who knows if we meet this insane guy again." you shrugged, but your posture was still polite. "Which insane guy?" Seras asked then with wide eyes.
"I don't know his name right now. Met him once. This huge man, with glasses, is always muttering about the Holy Bible and the right of good. He got some blades, and besides Alucard, he is a beast in human form.... He gives off maniac vibes, not gonna lie," you explained then to her.
"Who (Y/N) means is my old friend Anderson." Alucard added smoothly before tipping his red hat a little.
"Friend we say now, to enemies?" you shot back when your head tilted up to meet his gaze through his orange glasses.
"Friend is what we say to people who have our respect and entertain us, my lady," he answered, and his smile widened just a fraction to show the hint of his teeth.
"The fact is, Anderson and the Iscariot are more than inconvenient in this scenario. We got a fragile peace of weapons when we respected their barriers as they respected ours, due to the situation." Your sister spoke sternly as she took a drag on her cigar.
"The situation just gets out of hand. The Major is a threat to the Iscariot and to us. As soon as this is over, they will try to get us. Just for the love of God." Walter meant, as he stood in perfect posture.
"You're our best chance to talk this out, (Y/N). Use your skills." Integra said.
"Use my skill. My skill was liked to be put away in a dusty old corner. Not meaning any offense, just stating the facts. When you say "my skill," you mean I need to make a statement." You pointed out then, your expression didn't really shift. This was when Alucard simply looked at you as if he saw a ghost. Hidden behind the glasses and the raven hair.
"A statement to pour blood, like you always used to, when it was inconvenient?" the dark voice asked. And this is when your face crumbled for just a second in confusion. You knew you were sometimes too eager. Yet, you remembered only one time when it actually came to a mess under your lead. Not that it was caused because you loved to have a mess. You wouldn't want to go that far to have blood splattered on walls. To have children traumatized because you had sent soldiers into a horde of ghouls. Sending those soldiers to their deaths as a distraction so the real army could take them out from the back. But still, it was not like you wanted it.
Even Integra now looked questionable over to Alucard. "What do you mean?" you asked him then. This is when he took a deep breath; it was like something flashed before him. Something from a time he yearned to forget. A past he didn't want to cling to, even when fractures of his long-dimmed soul told him different.
"A statement should be strong, my lady. Not just fear, but grabbing the root of the problem and showing enough consequences to actually make a difference." Alucard spoke then, smoothly turning his point.
What you didn't know, the vampire actually felt different about you, not just about your whole person, but lately things seemed to change.
It was a time for him; his ancient being didn't remember by mind, yet by the feeling he got when you were around. The way your brows pulled together when you were focused. Alone the way you were raising your head when someone called your name. And then this feeling when you looked at him.
Your eyes were kind, maybe a strong determination in them, but they were kind. It reminded him too much of someone he'd rather forget. Alucard was old, so very old, and history had been written; it's not like Mehmet had vanished with his death. Because the echo of what once had been, a friendship, a betrayal, too much memory.
And as the years passed by, as you grew older...you became more and more like that one man he knew he had a friendship with. It was to that Ottoman Empire. When cruelty ruled over reason. When gold and marble made a mighty atmosphere and yet might actually not have been loud, it was a silent claim. A claim that had been passed to Mehmet and then to Alucard. Both in very different ways.
And for once the vampire seemed to hold a certain fear in his heart...a feeling that long had been buried since nothing ever really could reach him.
So you two were now on the way; he was walking behind you like a looming shadow. Not hiding or waiting to strike. After all, your sister trusted in you not spilling blood. "Do you think Anderson will be there?" you asked him then as you walked down the streets that already had been closed off due to the heavy destruction. "Who knows that beast of a man is always looming somewhere? He is like a thunderstorm in summer, always looming close with a pressure you can taste in the air before it electrifies," he replied to you, when the usual smirk in his velvet voice was missing. It was still a little way to go; you knew already what you would say to the Iscariot. Yet something else was bothering you. This detachment in a way you weren't used to. Maybe it was the reason that Integra always was the first, and you came second, even when she didn't intend to. But no matter how wise you were, you were still a human.
"We need to work together, don't we?" was the next question, as if trying to pull a conversation with him. "We do. What are you referring to, my lady? That we don't? I'm here for your safety, and I keep the order intact when it's from your sister, my master." There it was, that little edge, even when he told you that in a calm voice. But you felt it in your heart.
You sighed before your feet now finally stopped. You even could listen to the sounds of the ghouls a few streets away. The low noise of a fading fire. And that smell, the smell of burnt flesh. A destruction just right for a monster. A surrounding absolutely perfect for it. You took your heart and looked now up. Into his crimson eyes. He was so handsome, that raven hair that flew in his face and simply framed those perfect features.
"It's the fact that I feel like you're trying to avoid me. I know I'm not perfect; I'm human, unlike you. As far as my knowledge goes, humans will always make mistakes. So would you mind telling me what's mine so we can get this out of the world?" You let him know what bothered you, making clear you knew you weren't invincible or untouchable; you never claimed to be. You were just eager. And for Alucard, you were too clever for your own good. "So you want to know what my problem is, little human? Since when does this disturb the peace of you? Aren't you occupied with achieving greatness?" It was not like he put hate in those lines, even when they cut. He even could see it in your face the way your brows furrowed just a bit. Composure cracking.
"Achieving greatness is not a wrong goal. Whenever I would be pleased and content, I would never grow further. You know that. You know how humanity works. So tell me, what disturbs you? I feel it when your presence is in the air. When I speak, you turn it off smoothly with that vampire charm. And everyone stays put and says nothing. What is so different? You didn't used to treat me like-" before you could speak further, he actually crouched down. He was just as tall as you at that height.
"You got a smart mind, a mouth that speaks so many clever words. Always being careful in your next step, even when you're not flawless. You do what needs to be done, no matter the cost. And you live with the consequences. You remind me of something I can't put my mind on at all. A time I can't remember without haunting visions when I dream. You unsettle me because this is the demeanor I know. As if I know what you will say the next moment. How do you try to turn it on your terms to get more than what is even requested. Stop proofing yourself." Alucard spoke; it was dark and serious. Those red eyes felt heavier than usual on you. And you had this lump in your throat. You unsettled him? How could you unsettle someone like him? You were a human, not even mighty in power, just in mind and words. You were born second; you couldn't even do as much as you would like. Yet your intentions never had meant harm.
"Then tell me what to do so that I don't unsettle you," you said, your voice lower, and for a moment it was like Alucard's mind wandered...
~~~~
"Then tell me what is required to do so I don't unsettle you, my friend." A booming voice was heard through the room. Alucard had been young, a time before he was that creature of the night who could rip out hearts in no time. That mighty vampire was not more than a young man, blue orbs that looked at the man he called friend.
"Stop taking more than what you need. Those men already gave you their lives. Don't put it over the edge when you don't need to," he said, and it had nearly been a plea. Alucard shared a lot with Mehmet, even his past that had been haunted by abuse.
"They give their life for free, my friend. They want it bigger; they want a life of purpose. Tell me, Alucard, what is life worth without a purpose that is worth dying for?" the young Sultan asked him, black curled hair on his head as his eyes intensely looked at Alucard's pale features.
The golden glow of the lamps and the dancing shadows just add to that eerie mood right now.
Mehmet once had protected his friend from those people with too much power. One of the events that shaped him to become that cruel general he would be later. Also just a boy now who hoped the world would heal someday. Wasn't it enough what had been given? More blood? More gold? More power for people to abuse the weaker ones. To break a spirit. "They want it...yes. But do they even know the true price for it? When you taught me one thing, it was not to break. Yet you keep pushing your own soldiers." Alucard meant it, and it was said with a hard edge. His face formed into a picture of clear disregard.
"You need to imagine what we can build on it, Alucard. What we have when they lay down their lives for it. We could protect what you always yearned to keep intact. No more injustice towards the noble. No more raped women who beg for their child. No more kids that had been dragged like you to powerful sultans for their entertainment. No kids in the war. Don't you see this vision?" Mehmet asked him as he stepped closer, and the shadows danced on his face.
"You want what's best. But you take it the wrong way. You don't want them to end up like me? Then make a statement in disapproval and form it instead of doing it the wrong way. Don't take too much too fast. It will tumble."
Once that deadly vampire also just had been a young man, with hopes of understanding. A wish for safety. Yet where did he end up finding safety? In the very darkness that had taken him from sanity as it snapped. When he became Vlad.
~~~~
"Alucard?" Your voice brought him back as you still looked in his face. Your voice has shifted differently now. Were you truly like the man he used to know? He used to call a friend.
Or was it the mere feeling you seemed to awaken in him?
And for one moment he just looked at you, this time not only with that cold demeanor he seemed to have now when he saw you. A fraction of warmth. You weren't Mehmet; you were your own person. A part of him knew that. The other seemed to get lost. He took a deep breath. When you felt a large hand cradling the side of your face.
"You think big, and you mean good. Just don't lose the goal by trying to reach more than you were born for." Those words came from his lips in a caress this time.
"More than I was born for?" One of those questions you couldn't make out what he meant.
"Sometimes someone is born just to run up that hill, and sometimes they were born to change aspects and perspectives. You have talent, my lady. But don't forget your humanity. You don't have to achieve something; your soul was not meant for doing. That's the turning point," the vampire explained as you just wondered for a moment. You knew Alucard had seen more than anyone else, always something that amazed you as a child. When you eagerly asked him for stories of that time. When you wanted to know what really happened, not just what is written in history books. Yet that one part of him didn't want to push you away. It was unusually twisted with him now. You had just slightly tilted your face into his palm. There it was, that flicker of kindness. You weren't overachieving, but you were so eager for your age. So pretty, the same eyes as his one friend. The same cleverness he used to bring by the table.
"You know, sometimes I miss it... That you look at me. That anyone looks at me. I don't want the pity; I just want to get recognized, and not only because of what I might do, but as me." You confessed, softer now in tone. Something he also had heard of from Mehmet. He had been a Sultan, while you...you were (Y/N), driven by a strong purpose to get the best out of it and make it work. You put in hard work and patience. No sultan, but close to being one when times would be different. "You miss that a pair of eyes is not only seeing that shell," he pointed out, and for once it was a slow moment between you. Unsaid what it meant. But it was there. "I miss that people see more than only being the second. I feel like sometimes they just seem to forget I can be someone. That I am someone. I'm not insecure; I just want someone who is...proud of me." Rare words of a vulnerability you let shine through. When you two heard a noise from a bit further away, both your heads snapped up. This is when this moment was over...
By the time you two actually made it to the camp from Iscariot, it currently held its position here and defended everything else around it. "We need to talk with Maxwell. Do you see any weapons? I believe not. We're not here to break the current peace. We just need to get through it," you explained to a nun whose black hair and eyes were not visible, one of the girls Anderson actually recruited and raised as his own. The discussion took a bit, but as if it was summoned, that tall, broad shadow of Andersan actually came through. That guy was already fire and flame to actually attack that vampire. You were the only shield between it. "What? Sir Integra now sends her sister? Are you even aware of what it means when you march through our territory now?" Anderson asked you, but his stormy eyes had been fixed on Alucard the whole time. "You will talk with respect, won't you? Or do I need you to remind me of the last time we met, Anderson?" Alucard asked him, Ready to defend your word?, simply because of the order he got. And maybe because, no matter how much you sometimes unsettled him...you were something he couldn't let loose.
Although things seemed to escalate, it was not because of their argument. More because hell broke in... Ghouls, and not just that vampire that was told about. Agents from the Major himself. Just a taste before the spectacle was actually coming. "To the East border!" Anderson howled. "This is not over, vampire, as it's not over for you, girl. You should hide her." Anderson advised, perhaps aware that, as a Hellsing like your sister, you were a virgin, which meant the scent of your blood drew creatures in. Even though you didn't think you were in danger as long as you had Alucard at your side. Perhaps you miscalculated, as Alucard actually got in a fight on a rooftop, and you had tried to find shelter behind a small tower. You had made it; your willpower was strong. How else should it be? But your body was not made to fight, not like that. You had gotten hurt at one point. You bled strongly on your arm and also had a wound on the side of your neck. How it looks being not injured was not that easy. As Alucard fought off the rest. All you saw was a flash of red, the dark sky, and smoke in the air, how it formed figures that got lost the higher they got. Would you die? No, you wouldn't; that was simply impossible with Alucard here, but still, the pain was a lot. Did you panic? Also, no, not more than what your body actually let through due to the situation.
But there was this feeling in your chest. Did you really go too far with what you wanted? You unsettled the great No-Life king with your whole mind. The way you acted and spoke. You were kind but still pragmatic enough to do what needed to be done, no matter if it meant that you needed to be seen as a villain for a moment. Born to be greater but forced to go along with everyone else. This was the little but fine difference between you and Mehmet, simply the era when you were born. And every time he looked in your eyes, he saw a friend that once had been and still a betrayal that had hurt the very core of him. Not the vampiric part of him but the long-forgotten human one...
The situation maybe got a bit out of hand, but not so much that Alucard transformed; he was still in his red coat, no count, and of course not the Level 0 form of him. "Alucard..." you said; your voice was strained as a cough followed. "Hold on, tough one. You won't bleed to death with me," you could hear. Although as the time ran over, it felt different. The wound on your neck seemed to have gotten deeper than you had thought. Could you really deduct yourself so much? Was he right in the end? You were on the edge of falling unconscious. Maybe that is the reason why your mind felt troubled.
Yet before your body could tilt sideways, there it was. That familiar cold feeling on your side. You were not strong enough to sit up now. So his towering form was beside you. As you then turned your head upwards, something seemed to hit him. Different from before. Because your eyes were filled with a complex shadow. You wanted love, but you didn't want to commit. Because you were afraid it wouldn't be enough, that everything you wanted to build was too little. Greater, bigger, more powerful. You wanted to be remembered, and he could see it. That beautiful girl was in the study and planned the best strategies just for a special outcome. The same nights Mehmet had spent planning war...those same eyes that hold the same shadow. Just a different coin, a different time, and now a different person.
Alucard's features turned nearly soft; something warm spread over his face. "Do you think you're dying, my friend?" he asked then, and you had never heard him call you "my friend." Even half-conscious, your brows furrowed slightly. "Maybe I should feel how you felt it. You live way too long now, don't you?" You shot back a weak attempt to cover your uncertainty for once. He brushed a strand of hair out of your face with his long, pale fingers. "I do, and you never did notice it," he replied, and for a moment everything around seemed to stop. The ghouls had been only a red mess on the ground. The rest was burning and calling for help, but Iscariot would take care of it below. Here on the roof, it was quiet. The tang of blood still clung to both of you now. "You always look at me as if I disappoint you, and now you look at me as if I would be worth every sacrifice you could make. Tell me why. You're twisted... I know that. In a way maybe not even I might understand. But why?" These words were a whisper as you looked at him through your lashes. "You had betrayed me once. You made me love an imagination of mutual understanding; what remained had been a blood sport." He spoke, his arm cradled along your form, and you felt he hadn't talked with you now. But it did not feel foreign.
"You made loving me a blood sport," he added, and his thumb had been on your chin. "Who am I to you?" you asked him as you felt a trickle of blood coming out of your mouth. He wiped it away and smeared it along your skin. "You had been a friend, you had given me knowledge, you had taken my hostage. A friendship bordered on obligation. Not always, but at the very end, wouldn't you say that too?" What he saw was your face; the feeling was real.
"You remember a time I wasn't born, Alucard," you told him, feeling your body growing weaker as he cradled you closer. "Your body was not born, but you have his mind; you speak his words. Just the time is wrong. You feel wrong as you feel right, my dear," he murmured before he actually licked your blood off his thumb. That raven hair in his face as he stood up with you. "Is that the reason you avoid me? Because whoever you had been, that human part of you remembers it?" you asked him then. "I know I'm not fair, not to you. Yet I do care. Tell me, do you feel something there?" he asked you as his red eyes traced down to your heart.
"I feel a void of something that no matter how much I try to fill it will only grow hollower with every time I fail or even every time I win. This world is not made to let me be great. Maybe I was not made to be great," you confessed in your bleeding state as your hand trembled when you laid it on his hand. "You forget something..." he told you then. "Maybe you already had lived a life where you achieved that greatness you yearn so much for, my dear. And your mind, as your soul just searches for something to hold on to. As mine is holding onto yours..." and with that your eyes fluttered shut as if for the first time in decades someone told you to rest. Maybe a part of you had been a Mehmet in another life. Maybe you had already achieved greatness and didn't want to lose that one twisted soul that was anchored so deep in that undead being that carried you to safety.
"Sleep now, my dear. Because when you wake up, you will be a version of yourself that you couldn't be when I was feeling the air in my lungs," he murmured to your limp form. And the look on his face was truly tender. No avoidance from now on. You had lived a life before you were born; he had watched, and he had felt a bitter betrayal of loyalty. But humans can change, right? And as much as Alucard adored humanity, he had always been afraid of yours. Now he would try not to be...because in the end this was your rebound chance. And you still had been stuck with him, no matter if you knew it or not.
And he decided he would try to let it in because it already took root in his undead heart...you were a memory of a life that had been ended in blood and gore. Maybe you would be the key to filling it now with love...
