"Has anything ever been fair to either of us in our entire miserable lives?" Elion raised a brow incredulously. "Have you considered, my love, that perhaps you're lying to yourself about lying to yourself? Neither of us have been in this situation before. And my first instinct is to run away as well, believe me. But I have also never been more convicted of anything in all my horrid days as I have about wanting you in them. Dare I say, I'd actually be rather devastated should you decide to leave. And whoever would I do such delicious things to if not you?" Of course he couldn't keep on topic for such a serious conversation. And he hated himself for it, just a smidge. But deflection was hardwired into them both, just as their instinct to fly from any sort of closeness. But perhaps self preservation, when no longer needed, became self sabotage. Elion let out a heavy sigh. "Please, darling. Don't spout such drivel anymore. I can't take it. Not when there's so much at stake. Not when I...well, when I've finally something to live for besides...whatever it was that motivated me before I met you."
Astarion's instincts all screamed at him to flee. To run. To deflect, destroy, gaslight, anything to keep Elion from saying those things to him, from feeling those things about him. What possible good would it do him, to lose what he was for someone else?
But would he really be losing anything? Wouldn't he be losing more if he didn't give in to this frightening feeling in his bones?
"It was never supposed to be like this!" Astarion said, frustrated, but truthful, even if it was a painful truth now. "I said all the right things, I did all the right things, everything to make sure you became attached and wanted to protect me... only finding myself wanting to do whatever I could to protect you. Do you understand what it means to... to love a creature like me?"
"Can you please make an imagine of a disney marathon with ashh?? Or going to disney with him!! Something disney related😊😊"
Watching Disney Movies
Ashton was lying on his side, facing you with his elbow dug into his pillow and bent so that his head rested in his hand. You plopped down, relaxing into the bed, sighing at the discomfort.
“Good morning, sunshine.” He said in his cute voice, dimples spreading into his cheeks.
You groaned in response, having no energy to even think of anything to say.
“What’s wrong, babe?” Ashton asked, reaching down with his other hand and brushing the hair away from your face. “Your face is on fire. Are you feeling alright?” He pressed the back of his hand to your forehead.
“No, I’m not feeling alright.” You grumbled, your eyes slipping closed again.
“Oh, no…” Ashton said, pulling his hand away from your face. “It’s because you were out dancing gin the rain with Michael last night.” He said, looking off to the side, thinking back on the previous night. “I told you not to stay out too late since you were in shorts and barefoot.”
“Ugh, it was fun though.” You muttered. “Michael wanted to dance.”
“I know, but I was just looking out for you,” Ashton said, leaning down to press his lips to your warm forehead.
“Everything…hurts,” you mumbled, trying to curl your knees up to your chest and get into the fetal position.
“I’m sorry, honey,” Ashton said, reaching around you and running his fingers down your back. “Here, I know what will make you feel better…”
You could feel Ashton swing himself over the side of the bed and stand up. He took a few steps before leaving the room. You could hear him in the kitchen banging around a bit. You laughed, wincing at the discomfort and throb in your head, back, neck, and shoulders.
A few minutes later, Ashton came back with a tray with a bowl, cup, and a stack of movies. He set the tray down at the end of the bed and looked up at your limp body, loosely curled in a ball.
“I heated some soup from the other night and made you my famous chocolate milk that you love so much.” He smiled at you, brushing his messy hair out of his eyes. He stood at the foot of the bed, looking adorable in his sweatpants, bare chest, and glasses. His dimples lingered in his cheeks as he came around to the side of the bed again. “Do you want me to just let you sleep? Or do you want to eat a bit and watch some movies?”
You looked up at him. He was being so sweet by taking care of you. Ashton was the type of boyfriend, that, even after being together for two years, he still thought of the little things. This hadn’t been the first time he’d taken care of you while you were sick, and it meant so much to know he truly cared about the way you were feeling.
“Um, I’ll try drinking some chocolate milk.” You mumbled, turning over onto your back.
“That’s my girl,” Ashton laughed. He knew you would go for his chocolate milk given any state you were in. “Here, let’s try to sit you up against some pillows.”
Ashton pressed one of his knees onto the bed beside you and held a hand under your neck for support as his other wrapped around your side and helped you sit up against the pillows in front of the headboard. You sighed, sinking back into the pillows, trying to conserve the little energy you still had.
Ashton reached down and picked the tray up, placing it over your lap. He picked up the stack of movies and spread them out on the bed for you.
“Which one do you want to watch first?” He asked. You looked down at the movies, reading the titles. There were about seven movies, all Disney.
You smiled to yourself, “You choose.”
Ashton picked one at random and took it over to the t.v. He popped it in and then came back to the bed and climbed under the covers with you. You leaned your head down on his shoulder, reaching out to take the cup of chocolate milk off the tray. You grasped the cup, but weren’t confident enough to be able to bring it to your mouth and back to the tray without spilling it everywhere.
Ashton quickly reached over and grabbed the cup, bringing it close to your face. You reached up and held onto it with the little energy you had. Ashton didn’t let go of the cup as you helped him bring it to your mouth, taking a sip. He pulled the cup away from your lips, allowing you to swallow.
“That’s so amazing.” You muttered, leaning forward, indicating you wanted more. You took another sip and then licked your lips after, nodding in indication that you were good for now.
“All the best for my girl.” Ashton said, turning his face to press a kiss to your warm temple.
The movie began playing. The colorful images and music danced and played through the t.v. You loved Disney movies and since you had met Ashton years ago, you had really gotten him into the Disney movie spirit as well. Every time there was a rainy day or you weren’t feeling well, or you just wanted to have a lazy day at home, Ashton would always break out the Disney movies.
After a few minutes, you kept fidgeting with yourself and couldn’t find a good position to be in. Ashton took notice of it soon enough and pushed the tray to the end of the bed and pulled you into his lap. You rested your head against his chest and curled into his body, which usually felt warm, but given your current state, he felt cooler than you.
He kissed the top of your head and ran his fingers down your back in a soothing rhythm. His long fingers danced and swirled around on your back, which relaxed you into a state of half-consciousness. Because he was a musician, he always had some rhythm to tracing shapes into your skin. You found it cute, and of course, relaxing, especially when needed. Like right now.
Every now and then, Ashton would giggle at one of the animated characters on the screen, making you smile weakly. Your mind danced between an awake state and a twilight zone. You fought to stay awake through the movie as you loved it, but felt as though you needed your sleep in order to get better, too. You were able to sit back against Ashton’s chest with your head leaned back against his collarbone for awhile before dozing off completely.
When you awoke a little while later, you lifted your head from Ashton’s lap. He giggled at the screen before turning to look down at you.
“Hi,” he smiled, “how are you?”
“I’m okay. How long was I asleep?” you asked, looking to see that another Disney movie was playing.
“About four hours.” Ashton said, pushing a few strands of hair away from your face.
“You’ve been laying here watching Disney movies while I slept for hours?” You questioned.
“Sure have, baby.” He said happily. He leaned closer to you, reaching down to slip the hairband off of your wrist and pulled your damp hair off of your neck and tied it behind your head. You felt a wave of coolness wash over your body, instantly feeling better.
“Thank you,” you sighed, sitting up next to Ashton and leaning your head down on his shoulder. You pulled your knees up and leaned them down on his lap. His hand came up and draped his arm over your legs and brushed his fingers gently over your legs. He kissed the top of your head as he turned his attention back to the television.
You smiled to yourself, feeling a bit better knowing you had someone so amazing by your side through the thick, the thin, the sickness, and in health.
A/N: alsdjhkwol Ashton feels. I thought this was really sweet, idk. sorry the focus isn't really entirely on watching Disney movies but yeah i hope you like it thank you for requesting @puccinettafash :) x
GUYS DAVE IS GOING TO DIE AND I DONT THINK I CAN HANDLE THAT. MOSTLY BECAUSE I HAVE A PRETTY GOOD FEELING JADE IS GOING TO COME BACK SO THEY WILL BE APART UGH I CANT EVEN RN
