[Hephaestus after divorcing Aphrodite]
Hephaestus: It's a good day to pick up some Ambrosía, light a couple candles and scream into a pillow.
Apollo: Heph, are you okay?
Hephaestus: No.
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[Hephaestus after divorcing Aphrodite]
Hephaestus: It's a good day to pick up some Ambrosía, light a couple candles and scream into a pillow.
Apollo: Heph, are you okay?
Hephaestus: No.
Demeter: Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind always.
Hephaestus: I once saw you punch a girl scout because she didn't have any thin mints.
Demeter: Exactly, that's my battle so be kind.
Apollo: What is the phobia of chainsaws called.
Hephaestus: Common sense.
Zeus: Ares just back talked to me. Tomorrow while he's at school, I'm logging into Minecraft and destroying his fuckin village.
Hephaestus: Don't destroy it, just plant a ton of TNT with a pressure plate around him, so HE destroys it when he logs in.
Hephaestus: I love you mom.
Hera: I have a boyfriend.
Zeus: Tell me the truth, do you drink?
Kid Hephaetsus: No dad, I'm 11
Zeus: Wow Hera, our sons a loser
Hephaestus: Our sister Hebe was having a bad day because of some guy so I decided to buy all her favorite things to show her how a guy should really treat her.
Eris: Our brother Ares used to practice WWE moves on me.