#hercampus

[dabiconcordia]

“A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship.” ― Markus Zusak

[maekayeblogs]

Non-Traditional Christmas Playlist 2022

If you are anything like me, you like variety. You find too much of the same thing can become overwhelming, and find Christmas music to be n

[josiebelladonna]

i finally looked up the phrase “sexual being” because i get annoyed just looking at that phrase and i don’t feel it in the least. 

oh god. oh god, the amount of cringe i experienced reading through all of this.

Being a sexual being does not mean you have to have a lot of sex or act provocatively. It is about expressing your sexuality and what makes you feel beautiful.

excuse me, isn’t that the same thing? sexuality has to do with sex (i mean, hello, it’s in the name)? make me feel beautiful, that’s hilarious. i’ve done things that make me feel beautiful and then i’m automatically shown how it’s not the case right after. i’m pushed to believe that beauty is a lie.

In today's society, most people believe every action made by a woman, with a sexual orientation, is to entice a man. This thought process, however, is false.

the men i’ve (tried to) entice wanted nothing to do with me. so, um... yeah. get the fuck out of here with this.

Women are beautiful and mysterious creatures. We are smart and strong, all while possessing the gentlest touch of human life.

some of the worst - the worst - people i’ve ever had the displeasure of encountering were women. some of the dumbest people i’ve ever had the displeasure of encountering were women. some of the cruelest people i’ve ever had the displeasure of encountering were women. yeah, so much for “beautiful”, “mysterious”, and “gentle”.

For this reason alone, we are too special to live life for the pleasure and entertainment of a man. A woman needs to live life for herself and admire her body, mind and soul.

tell this to my stupid family. i put my foot down back in late 2015 that i was living life on my own terms and my idiot father and brother took it as me spiraling into a deep depression. i’m still trying to understand how they came to this conclusion, too.

Once you embrace your independence and sexuality, you will feel empowered and confident. You will no longer feel controlled by a man's opinion or judgment.

i did and i didn’t hear the end of it: in fact, 7 years later and i’m still feeling the fallout from it, from my dad’s paranoia and his incessant, unfair, damaging judgments, calling me an alcoholic (i’m not) and straight up admitting to me that he didn’t want me around the last time i visited him 4 years ago. 

in fact, you want... you wanna know how much i’m actually dreading seeing them this thanksgiving and i’m only looking forward to just being up there in reno? when i posted my ancestry dna results back in february, and i tagged my dad, my aunt chris, my brother, and my sis-in-law in the post, my aunt was the only person who reacted with utmost joy and interest. my dad reacted with “huh...” and my brother and his wife were a.w.o.l. yes, the two “most important men” in my life only want something from me whenever it’s convenient. they don’t care, otherwise. is this empowering? i don’t know, you tell me.

1.Dress For Yourself

Whether it's hipster chic or on the risky side, your individual style is how you showcase yourself to the world. If you let someone else dictate your style, you aren't portraying who you really are. So, next time you reach into your closet, pull out an outfit that's all your own!

cue all the times i heard “why don’t you dress more GIRLY” “be more GIRLY” “i’ll help you dress more GIRLY” GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY FEMININE GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY GIRLY  like it’s unanimous that there’s something horribly wrong with my wearing jeans and a shirt and my chucks. i always have to wear dresses and shit. it’s not just family, either: it’s everywhere i go. i’ll only get taken seriously if i dress ~girly~.

2. Have an Opinion

There are 7 billion people that populate the planet earth. We are bound to possess different opinions on the multitude of topics associated with life. Each of us has different life experiences, which help form our opinions. This being said, you have every right to voice your own opinion on what you feel strongly about and don't need to comply with what others think.

TELL THIS TO DAVEIGH, TEMPLE, EVERYONE WHO’S BLOCKED ME, AND THE BANDFIC SIDE OF LIFE having an opinion of my own has only isolated me and buried me and made me into this dark specter over on ao3, a reputation that i absolutely hate and i didn’t want, and you’re telling me i should be proud of this instead? you’re telling me that i should be proud of the fact that no one wants to talk to me all because of what i think and feel? how dare you?

3.Be the Boss

That's right, I said it, be the boss! Make it your mission to be a boss in life. Strive for the best and capture the unattainable.

there’s another message in my inbox, one underneath all the vitriol that’s basically “hey, sorry to bother you but your art is awesome”. my whole hang-up with the phrase “sorry to bother you” is another post in and of itself (it’s basically, why are you apologizing?) but this is what being “a boss” has done for me, though. it’s put me in a corner that i have no way of breaking out of.

Never let anyone disrespect you or make you feel less than you're worth. You are a strong woman, who is capable of achieving greatness. So get out there, and go for it!

i’ve only received a genuine compliment a few times in life, none of them from family so i didn’t know what to do with them. and i have “gotten out there and went for it”, and it’s only left me wanting to die.

4. Showcase Your Body

The female body is a true art form. A woman should be allowed to showcase her body in any way she chooses (sic). It is not wrong or provocative to post pictures that embrace your body.

tell this to alliertaha on instagram, who blocked me and body-shamed me all because i posted a picture of myself last november. hell, tell this to anyone. i share my body with the world and the world runs the other way and calls me creepy.

If you love yourself and admire your body, then as a woman, you have the right to do so. It does not make you a slut and does not decrease your worth. Flaunt the beauty that is your body and love the skin you’re in.

my body is NOT beautiful. my hair is too long and coarse. my face is too round. i have a thick bull-like neck. i have a humongous 40-ddd chest and a round belly. i’m hippy as hell. i’m over 260 pounds. everything about me is thick, and not in a good way.

yeah, i’ll totally flaunt all of this. yeah, i totally get ALLLLLLL the action.

5.Take Pictures for Yourself

It is common for a woman to partake in certain actions that could gain attention from a man. These types of activities could be as simple as posting a sexy picture on Instagram or uploading a cute snap to your Snapchat story, in the hopes your crush will see.

for all i know, my crush might be repulsed me. no joke: i have this overhanging fear that he’ll tell me off or say something to me that will make me reconsider my crush on him. i feel gross by the fact i even have a crush in the first place, like it feels so wrong to me to like another person. it feels so wrong that i desire to feel a certain gray streak between my fingers. it feels so wrong that i even do experience sexual desire all together.

Attracting a man’s attention, however, should not be the driving force in posting a photo. You should post pictures for yourself and post what makes you confident. That being said, I guess a little male attention doesn’t hurt sometimes…

i’m going to go out on a limb and say this: this is why i hate being a woman, and i’m not saying this in a “i want to be a boy”/transgender manner. when i seek out advice of women like this, in feeling better about myself, there’s always this horse shit. this “oh, i always have to cover myself up and wear baggy clothes to hide away from male attention” nonsense, which renders the advice completely pointless. what is the point of being all like “oh, yeah, sexuality is important it’s imperative to express yourself sexually” and then turning around and saying “men shouldn’t look at us, always hate it when men look at you”? deny it all you want, ladies: that’s literally what you sound like. and i have posted pictures for myself before and it does absolutely bupkiss for my confidence level in the long run. i’m always shown at some point that i am not this “beautiful creature”.

6. Know and Love Yourself

No one knows you better than yourself.

(don’t remind me)

Make choices that benefit you and the person you inspire to become.

...?

Never let someone influence the decisions you make in life.

again... i have. and i didn’t hear the end of it and i’m still dealing with the fallout 7 years later (god, i wish i could break into my old phone and show you guys the conversations my dad and i had when i first moved down here and he was giving me “””””””advice”””””””” in how to find a job and get my life on track again, with such classics as “you NEED to exude confidence” and “you have the disease” and “get a job because you are so incompetent” - yes, he actually said that to me). my worst fear is a britney spears-type conservatorship because apparently being a “strong, independent woman” is way too much to ask for the two assholes that are my dad and my brother. they’re already on their way, too: i can’t voice any different opinion on facebook without the former going around behind my back and relaying it to my mom. i can’t stand those idiots. i don’t love them, not one bit. i can’t love them, it’s impossible to love them. it’s completely impossible, after what they’ve done to me.

Live life for you. Be you. You are beautiful.

no. i am not. i am not in the least bit beautiful. i’m ugly and widely hated. fic writers want nothing to do with me (and they’re kinda pussies about it, too? i at least had the balls to say daveigh/greendruidess’ name: she has to be like “if you’re talking about the person i think you’re talking about, smh”, which feels so cowardly to me. yeah, there’s this whole thing with the internet where people like to rally, but when someone’s bullying you, it’s sort of important to say their name). the art world doesn’t know what to do with me. i tried being myself and wound up with feeling like a complete monster for just existing.

yeah, so much for being a proper “sexual being”. yeah, soooooooo sexy.

[sbrinacarmo]

HerCampus: Métodos Contraceptivos: Entenda A Diferença Entre Eles E Qual Pode Ser A Melhor Opção Para Você

Publicado originalmente em HerCampus

Cerca de 214 milhões de mulheres não tinham acesso a métodos contraceptivos no mundo em 2017, de acordo com estudo do Guttmacher Institute. Em 2019, a Organização Mundial da Saúde anunciou que, todos os dias, foram registrados mais de 1 milhão de novos casos de infecções sexualmente transmissíveis e tratáveis.

Essas estatísticas escancaram a importância dos direitos sexuais e reprodutivos, que também são direitos humanos. Todas as pessoas deveriam ter os seus direitos de exercer a sua sexualidade livremente garantidos, além de ter acesso ao planejamento familiar e à informação sobre sexualidade e reprodução.

O livre exercício da sexualidade só é devidamente garantido com o acesso à informação de qualidade e aos métodos de proteção e contracepção, que evitam a gravidez e as Infecções Sexualmente Transmissíveis (ISTs).

A Dra. Ilza Maria Urbano Monteiro, ginecologista e vice-presidente da Comissão Nacional Especializada de Anticoncepção da Febrasgo, é forte defensora da boa orientação contraceptiva antes da escolha final do método.

Em sua atuação clínica, ela observou que a principal preocupação das mulheres é a eficácia. “Essa é a primeira pergunta. ‘Esse método é bom mesmo? Não falha?’. A gente orienta quais são as taxas de falha que a gente observa em cada método. Outra coisa que se pergunta é sobre efeitos colaterais”.

Segundo a doutora Monteiro, muitas mulheres vem apresentando preocupações com o risco de trombose, apesar de sua ocorrência ser baixa. Essa doença está associada ao estrogênio, presente em alguns métodos hormonais – que hoje em dia possuem menores quantidades da substância.

Além disso, métodos que contém essa substância não são indicados para mulheres que têm pressão alta, tendência a pressão alta, enxaqueca, diabetes descompensadas, doenças no fígado, entre outras condições, por ser uma substância que aumenta a pressão sanguínea.

Na hora de escolher um método com as suas pacientes, a primeira coisa que a doutora leva em consideração é o risco de gravidez. Nesse momento, é importante ter em vista a frequência das relações sexuais – quanto mais recorrentes, maior o risco – e a idade da paciente – quanto mais jovem, maior a fertilidade. Com maior risco, é necessário um método com maior grau de eficácia.

Em segundo lugar, é importante saber o funcionamento do ciclo menstrual de cada mulher. Mulheres que têm um fluxo mais intenso podem não se adaptar com o DIU de cobre, pois ele tem a tendência de aumentar o sangramento. Mulheres que sofrem com muitas cólicas, ou que têm endometriose, podem ter o alívio dos sintomas utilizando métodos que reduzem o fluxo menstrual.

Antes de qualquer escolha, na opinião da doutora, é importante que o profissional de saúde investigue se a mulher pode ou não usar o método, em razão de questões de saúde.

Alguns exemplos são tumores benignos, pressão alta ou casos de trombose na família. O mais importante é escolher um método eficaz que respeite as condições de saúde e as vontades da mulher.

No Brasil, é possível ter acesso a oito tipos de métodos contraceptivos gratuitamente por meio das unidades do Sistema Único de Saúde (SUS). São eles: anticoncepcional oral combinado, minipílula, injeção mensal ou trimestral, DIU de cobre, camisinhas feminina e masculina, diafragma, pílula do dia seguinte, laqueadura e vasectomia. Entenda um pouco mais sobre eles abaixo.

Lembre-se: antes de começar a usar um método anticoncepcional, é essencial conversar com seu médico ou ginecologista de confiança. Assim, é possível ter certeza de que o método não apresenta nenhum risco para a sua saúde.

Anticoncepcional oral combinado e minipílula

Popularmente conhecido como pílula, o anticoncepcional oral é um método do tipo hormonal. Trata-se de um comprimido composto por estrógeno e progesterona sintéticos, substâncias que impedem a ovulação e a liberação do óvulo.

Esse é o método mais popular entre as brasileiras. Segundo pesquisa do IBGE de 2019, 40,6% das mulheres preferiam utilizar a pílula. A taxa de falha é de 0,1%.

Já a minipílula contém apenas a progesterona, e é tomada diariamente, diferentemente da pílula, que geralmente possui um intervalo de alguns dias. A minipílula costuma ser utilizada por mulheres que sofrem com os efeitos colaterais da pílula, ou que estão em amamentando.

Ela tem um efeito menos eficaz que a pílula de duas substâncias, tendo uma taxa de falha de 3 a 5%.

Injeção anticoncepcional

Outro método hormonal é a injeção, que também contém estrógeno e progesterona. A injeção pode ser feita mensal ou trimestralmente, e é aplicada na região dos glúteos. É o método escolhido por 9,8% das mulheres.

Ele também impede a ovulação, diminui o fluxo menstrual e alivia a dor das cólicas. A injeção tem uma taxa de falha de 0,1% a 0,6% para a opção mensal, e 0,3% para a trimestral, e é semelhante à eficácia da ligadura de trompas.

DIU (de cobre ou hormonal)

O Dispositivo Intrauterino é o terceiro método mais usado no mundo, atrás apenas da laqueadura e da camisinha masculina. Ao todo, são 159 milhões de mulheres, segundo a ONU, mas no Brasil é utilizado por 4,4% das mulheres.

O DIU é uma pequena estrutura em formato de T, que é inserida no útero. Então, por sua composição química, o DIU impede que os espermatozóides alcancem as trompas, onde ficam os ovários e acontece a fecundação.

Esse método tem uma taxa de falha entre 0,1% e 0,2% e pode ter uma duração de até 10 anos. Além disso, ele pode ser usado durante a amamentação. É um dos métodos mais seguros e, ao contrário do senso comum, não é abortivo.

Camisinha masculina e feminina

A camisinha masculina é o segundo método mais utilizado no mundo, correspondendo a 20,4% das mulheres. Ela é uma capa de plástico ou de látex, que é inserida no pênis antes da penetração.

No mercado, ela pode ser encontrada em uma variedade de tipos, inclusive com espermicida e lubrificante. Já a camisinha feminina tem um formato bem maior, e é introduzida na vagina.

As duas impedem a passagem do sêmen para o canal vaginal, evitando assim que os espermatozóides entrem em contato com a vagina e impedindo a ovulação. Ambas são descartáveis e possuem uma taxa de falha entre 8% a 20%.

São os únicos que, além de evitar a gravidez, também protegem contra as ISTs. Por isso, e também pela alta taxa de falhas, é muito recomendada a utilização de um método combinado com as camisinhas para garantir maior segurança durante o sexo.

Diafragma

O diafragma é um anel flexível de silicone, látex ou borracha, que também atua como um método de barreira. Isso quer dizer que ele impede que o sêmen chegue até o ovário.

O método tem um formato de cúpula, e é inserido no canal vaginal sobre o colo do útero. O diafragma pode chegar a uma taxa de falha de 10%, e pode ser usado por até 2 a 3 anos. É recomendável que o método seja utilizado juntamente com espermicida.

Pílula do dia seguinte

Diferentemente de outros métodos, a pílula do dia seguinte é um método contraceptivo de emergência. Trata-se de um composto de hormônios combinados, utilizado após uma relação sexual desprotegida ou quando o método usado apresenta alguma falha – por exemplo, quando uma camisinha rasga.

Ela atua dificultando a movimentação dos espermatozóides, além de atrasar ou inibir a ovulação da mulher. A pílula deve ser usada o mais rápido possível, após a relação sexual desprotegida – conforme o tempo passa, ela apresenta menor eficiência.

Possui uma taxa de falha entre 5% a 20%. Podem ser usadas entre 3 a 5 dias após a relação, dependendo de sua composição química.

Laqueadura e vasectomia

A laqueadura, ou ligamento de trompas, é o método mais utilizado no Brasil, com 17,3% das mulheres. No mundo, são 219 milhões de mulheres.

É uma cirurgia simples de esterilização, na qual é feito um corte ou uma amarração das trompas, que são os “caminhos” que ligam os ovários ao útero, e servem de passagem para os espermatozóides até os óvulos.

Ela é reversível em alguns casos, e é comum entre mulheres que já tiveram filhos e não desejam mais engravidar. No entanto, o procedimento também é realizado por muitas mulheres que nunca engravidaram.

A vasectomia é o método cirúrgico de esterilização realizado pelo homem. Nessa cirurgia, a circulação de espermatozóides é impedida por meio de cortes nos canais que os transportam dos testículos ao pênis.

A taxa de falha de ambos os procedimentos é de 1%.

[sbrinacarmo]

HerCampus: First Time Living In The Big City: What Is Like To Live Away From Family

Publicado originalmente em HerCampus

Leaving your parents’ house is a very important step in a person’s life. It is the first moment you really feel like a responsible adult. Regardless of the reason, college, job or anything else, it is a big change and marks a new phase, full of discoveries and new experiences.

This becomes even more exciting (and even frightening) when you are a person who has spent your entire life living in a small town. Outside the big cities, it is common to have a very varied image of what daily life is like in the metropolises: despite having many opportunities for study and work, several leisure options and diverse people can be available. But it also has many downsides, such as violence, the cost of living and the crowding of public transport.

Even knowing the problems, many choose to leave their hometowns and try their luck in the big city.

From Minas Gerais to Sao Paulo

Arthur da Silva Ferreira, 19 years old, was born in Ouro Preto, Minas Gerais, but grew up and lived in Campanha, in the south of the state, since he was 6 years old. He left his parents’ house for the first time in 2020, after finishing his senior year of high school to study Journalism at Casper Libero College.

He was in Sao Paulo two or three times before taking the exam to join the college, after that he came with his bags ready to live here. “When I came to Sao Paulo, I came totally unprepared on a shoestring. I was starting to make friends and get used to the city when the pandemic started.”

As classes became remote, he returned to Campanha, where he followed classes through online platforms. Despite all the rush he went through to find an apartment, he stayed less than a month on the property he shared with other students.

Because he did not think it was worth living the university experience only online, he ended up withdrawing from the course in 2022, but, with the return of classes in person, he returned to college to continue his studies and make the most of everything the college has to offer.

The first time he lived alone in the city, Arthur felt very lonely. He did not have any relatives or friends in the city and only with time he started to make friendships. “I always wanted to leave Campanha, because it is a small town. And the funny thing is, when I left, I suffered a lot. I remember [on the first day alone in Sao Paulo] I cried a lot. I spent a whole day locked in my room crying and wanting to go back to Campanha. I layed on my bed without the courage to do anything. The first days were very painful, because I did not know anyone.”

He misses family moments a lot, like playing with his brother and watching series with his mother. To kill the nostalgia, he would like to visit often, but the price of the tickets is an issue. In addition, he always tries to keep in touch with friends and family through the phone.

Today he is in his third week living alone – for the second time – and is still getting used to his independence. “It is a mix of feelings. It is a very big freedom. At home I had help from my parents and brothers, here I have to do everything. As nice as it is to live alone and live an adult life, it is also complicated, because we have to take care of our own things, be responsible and take care of the house.”

From the countryside to the capital

Alessandra de Souza, 20 years old, was born in Jaguariúna, in the countryside of Sao Paulo and in the metropolitan region of Campinas, where she lived until last year, when she moved to the capital. She left her parents’ house in November 2021 and moved to Sao Paulo for an internship opportunity that had always been her dream. Today she shares an apartment with her boyfriend and also studies Journalism at Casper Libero College.

The first time she lived alone was in Australia, where she spent 6 months, when she was 18 years old. “I think that helped a lot with the experience I am having right now.”. About the experience of living in a big city like Sao Paulo, she highlights one of the main advantages: “It is a city that never stops. If you want to eat something at three in the morning, you will find several options and this is very different from the cities in the countryside. I particularly like it.”

But not everything is perfect. When you start living alone, it is only a matter of time before unexpected problems arise. “Another thing that is very different is the housework. If I don’t do it, someone else won’t do it instead. So it is something I’m still trying to get used to.”.

The main difficulty that Alessandra feels is the issue of financial independence. “Knowing that everything depends on you: shopping, household bills… but homesickness is also very difficult to deal with”. She has a very close relationship with her family, especially her mother, with whom she used to go out often. “I really miss the interaction, going to restaurants together, going out without having to book a day and time.”

Despite everything, she understands that this is a necessary phase for her development as a person. “It is a different feeling, of freedom, even if we miss it a lot, but I think it is very important for our growth.”

The article below was written by Sabrina Carmo and edited by Isabella Gomes.

[talk2wendyw]

Eminence swept two categories in @HerCampus College Beauty Awards, widely considered best in beauty for college women! We were thrilled to see our Apricot Body Oil win in the Bodycare: Moisturizer segment and our Acne Advanced Cleansing Foam topping the list for Acne Treatments: Cleansers.⁠ ⁠ Let us know in the comments if you've tried either of these award winning products💚⁠ ⁠ Photo Credit: @spaspanarvik and photographer @gro__sol__holistisk⁠ __________⁠ #eminenceorganics #hercampus #skincare #green #wellness #instabeauty #skincareroutine #allnaturalbeauty #organic Repost from @eminence.lisa.wensley (at Your Organic Girl Skin Care, Inc.) https://www.instagram.com/p/CXRkLctv4QQ/?utm_medium=tumblr