It had been spreading everywhere. In every major city, there had been reports of family members gone missing, strangers disappearing soon after arrival, people being seen late at night in shadows, there one minute, gone the next. At least three reports came in every day, more in larger cities, sometimes none in rural towns, but some of those towns had stopped reporting anything. It was unnerving at best and terrifying at worst.
Bludhaven was worst. People from all walks of life were simply vanishing, and if they reappeared, they only appeared at night in the dark where you couldn’t be sure if you’d really seen anything. It wasn’t until officers started going missing that Dick started to worry. It had been two weeks since the first officer disappeared. Now, almost half of the station was gone.
Dick shook his head and locked the door of his apartment. So many friends just…gone. Even in the League, it was starting to be noticeable. That’s what scared him the most. What happened to the safety of the superheroes?
He jumped at a knock on his door. It was a strange sound to hear; people didn’t go out much anymore. He peered through the peephole, ready to barricade the door if he had to.
"…Guy?"
Dick opened the door as far as the chain lock allowed. ”Guy. What are you doing here?”
Guy smiled. ”Came to see how you were doin’. With all the cops missin’, I thought I’d….”
"Thanks." Dick opened the door wide, cocking his head as Guy seemed to hesitate. "Come on in. You always can, you know that."
Guy chuckled as he crossed the threshold. ”Yeah, I know. But people aren’t the same as they were.”
"Yeah…."
Dick told Guy to make himself comfortable while he put on some coffee and grabbed some notes. He wanted Guy to look at a couple of reports he’d been working on, hoping he could shed some light on them where Dick couldn’t. It wasn’t until Dick stood up from his filing cabinet that he felt the strange presence behind him.
"Guy…?"
The second Dick began to turn, he found himself slammed against the cabinet. He struggled and fought, managing to break away just for an instant, only to be tackled to the ground.
Guy wasn’t Guy anymore. He still looked like him, but his usual somewhat ruddy complexion was pale as death, his eyes brighter than ever, his mouth a wide and vicious grin, his teeth—
Dick squirmed again, desperately trying to break away, but Guy was stronger than he’d ever known. Guy nuzzled his cheek, whispering dark promises that almost sounded sweet if Dick could have focused on the words instead of the cold terror in his stomach. Guy’s tongue on his neck was the only warning Dick got before a searing pain shot through him, burning his blood.
And then Guy began to lick him, and suddenly the pain was different. His blood still felt like flame, but it was a good flame, a hot, driving, pleasureful flame. A strained moan wailed up from his throat as he rocked up against Guy. His mind was a haze — everything was a haze — but Dick couldn’t stop moving. Even as he felt his blood drain and his body grow weaker and change, he couldn’t stop, just couldn’t stop. The last thing Dick felt was a final rush of pleasure and Guy’s mouth at his throat.
"Alright, Detective Gardner, this is your new partner, Detective Grayson. He’s new to Baltimore, but not to the force. Try to make him welcome. He’s Bludhaven’s best."
The expression on Guy’s face looked somewhere between a grin and a grimace. ”Yeah? Why’d Bludhaven get rid of him, then?”
"I moved here with my partner," the young detective said. That made Guy’s eyebrows raise. ”She wanted to go to college down here, and we figured it’d be cheaper to just rent a place here.”
Guy nodded to the sergeant who’d led Dick over, and he left with a return nod and roll of his eyes. Guy dropped back in his seat. ”So, you’re one’a them ‘equality in relationships’ types, huh? Well, lemme tell ya somethin’ straight. You’ve only got one partner in this precinct and that’s me. And strictly business, alright?”
Detective Grayson chuckled. ”Oh, I know. You don’t have to worry. Trust me, Detective, you’re not my type.”
Guy honestly wasn’t sure if he should feel offended or not.
Dick emerged from the tall grass onto Route 34 to Goldenrod City, whistling happily. He’d just caught himself a Ditto, and after one quick trip to the Pokemon Center, he’d start training it good. He’d just passed the Day Care when a man in green walked up to him, blocking his path.
"You still thinkin’ about goin’ in? You’ll have to get past me first! Team Lantern runs this town, an’ we’re not just gonna let some little punk cross in whenever he wants!"
Guy looked up from his roll sheet only once Coach Grayson had pointedly cleared his throat, having already been waiting in silence for about thirty seconds. New record, Guy thought, grinning as he focused on the younger man. ”Grayson. What’s eatin’ ya?”
The gymnast smiled back — although it looked strained — and rocked on his toes a little. ”Why do you think my boys found worn jockstraps on their lockers after practice yesterday?”
Guy snorted, but sobered up quickly. ”Really? Well, no idea. Tried askin’ around?”
"That’s what I’m doing." That smile was definitely forced. "Our teams are the only two that practice at the same time. I was just wondering if you knew why they were there."
Guy shrugged. ”No idea. Prob’ly just a harmless prank from a few of the boys. Nothin’ ta worry about.”
Grayson nodded, his smile finally flickering. For a moment, Guy thought he’d finally managed to wipe that stupid smile of Grayson’s off his face, but then the gymnast smiled again, wider and almost a little meanly.
"Well then," he said, smiling that strange smile up at Guy, "I suppose boys will be boys."
"You got it."
Grayson nodded and started to turn around. ”Oh, one more thing, Guy.” He turned back. ”It’s very heartfelt: All deeds come back to you. Look up.” With one last smile, the younger coach walked back to his team’s side of the lockers, leaving a very confused Guy Gardner.
What the hell did that even mean? As far as he knew, the kid wasn’t religious at all. ”That was weird,” he muttered to himself.
Suddenly, one of his boys came running out from the lockers. ”Coach Gardner! Coach Gardner! We have a… problem….”
"What? Lost yer jocks already? I told you guys to pick them up after—"
"We did! Well, we meant to…. That is… You’ll see."
The boy led him into the gymnasium, where the rest of the team had slowly gathered. They were all murmuring to each other, looking around and up before focusing back on their friends. Guy followed their gazes upward.
There, strung out across the ceiling of the entire gymnasium, were 42 jockstraps, all hanging high above the heads of their owners below. Look up, indeed.
"Fine," Guy muttered under his breath. "You win this round, Grayson."
[Chatzy log with hotheadedlantern and speedypuffs. Takes place after Dick and Damian spend the night in the Westfalia and Guy sleeps in the forest.]
Guy wakes in the forest, feeling like absolute crud. His leg isn't just throbbing, it's swollen. He limps back to camp at first light and rests on one of the picnic tables for a bit.
Dick wakes with the light after a strange dream, sweating more than the air should allow. He wakes Damian gently, feeds him the last of the lemon cakes, and gets him onto a bike. If they really want to make a search for Kyle, they'll need more supplies than soaps and a single can of chili. The ride back to the camp is easy, far too short than Dick's direction tells him it should be, but everything feels so turned around he doesn't question it. It's too early and he's too exhausted. He sends Damian off to shower and sleep some more, and wheels the bicycles up to the longhouse, resting them against the front. He turns to decide what to do next--he's tired, but he's too nauseous from not eating, but he should tell someone what they found--when he sees Guy. A wave of relief washes over him and he makes his way over to him. "Guy! You're safe!"
Guy opens his eyes where he's laying on the bench of the picnic table. "Where th' fuck have you been?" he groans. "Heard you an' Damian..."
Dick leans a little too heavily against the table, looking over Guy. "We got lost, fell down a hill. There was something coming at us, I never saw it. I was worried it might've..." He reaches down and brushes Guy's shoulder. "At least you heard us. We spent the night in an old VW bus. Brought back some bikes. There's two more out there."
"Cool. ...No sign of Kyle?" he asks. He winces as he pulls himself up, using his legs to counterbalance himself.
Dick shakes his head. "Nothing. Damian insisted he wanted to stay out there, but I got him back here. None of us are equipped enough to look for him right now. If we're going to, we need to have some real supplies for a couple of days." He looks Guy over, taking in his appearance, his slight grogginess, and touches his forehead. "Hey, how're you doing? You look...."
"...Like shit?" Guy finishes for him. "Feel it, too. I'll be fine, just gotta get cleaned up. Bandage my leg, pop a few aspirins and grab some sleep before I head back out."
Dick frowns. "That better be a lot of sleep. And some food. How bad's your leg? Let me see it."
Guy starts pulling up his bell bottoms. "It looks worse than it is. I just need to scrub the hell out of it...clean it out..." The wound just below his knee is grotesque, the area around it is red, swollen, and hot to the touch.
Dick stares at it, his eyes wide. "No, Guy, you need to get that disinfected and really covered. I can help you clean and bandage it, but you should get Steph to look at it to make sure it's done up right. And you're not going back out there with it like this. You've got to rest it before you make it worse."
Mia had not woken up early that morning. She was just getting more and more frustrated about everything and stupid people and whatever situation she was in and she just wanted to punch someone in the face. She finally trudged her way up to the Longhouse going in and deciding to forgo making anyone coffee or breakfast because they really should be saving things and just using what they needed. So she made a small cup of coffee for herself and poured some cereal into a bowl eating it dry because that powdered milk was gross. She sat there for a moment before downing the rest of her coffee and grabbing her bowl of cereal and... find somewhere to be by herself or something she didn't even know. But Mia paused when she saw Dick and Guy, "What happened?"
Dick points to Guy's leg. "He's been walking on that the past few days."
"Fine, I'll rest it. I know how to scrub out a wound, I can-..." Guy stops when Mia appears, and then scowls at Dick's answer. "Would ya stop makin' a big deal already?"
Dick huffs. "When you start making a bigger deal of it, then yes. I will."
Mia looks between them and then at Guy's leg. "It looks pretty gross. I think that's a sign it's probably a big deal. I'm not a medical professional or anything though." She shrugs and offers her bowl of cereal out. "Cache brand corn flakes?"
Dick nods in thanks and takes a couple. "Ooh, my favorite." At this point, it's almost true the way he devours his flakes.
Guy shakes his head, "Thanks kiddo, I'll eat after I make a bigger deal outta my leg here so's I can shut up Dick's naggin'," he shoots Dick a wry look to show his concern is not entirely unappreciated, but he's threatening his tough guy cred. "I should get inside, an' boil some water..."
Dick scrunches his nose at Guy. "Want some help in?"
Mia nods. "I'll go get a first aid kit, they had bandages and stuff in them. And... crutches maybe? I don't think I saw any of those though."
"If we don't have any, I know we can find a walking stick. I saw some big ones in the forest yesterday."
Guy grumbles, "I don't need crutches..." All the same, he leans heavily on Dick as they make their way inside. "Thanks, kiddo," he tells Mia as she runs on ahead.
Dick smiles away from Guy as he helps him into the longhouse and plops him down on the sofa. "I'm gonna get us both some food, OK? Something to keep us going."
"Okay. Can ya boil some water while yer in there? Find some towel or washcloth, or somethin', a bowl, an' a wooden spoon or a stick...got it? ...Please."
Mia nods and heads off to the warehouse grabbing one of the first aid kits looking around briefly for crutches and not finding any and goes to get a stick from the line of trees because that's good enough. She holds it over her shoulder as she makes her way back to the longhouse, "I'm back."
Dick nods to Guy. "Yeah, Can do." He sighs when Mia returns because wow, his concentration's mostly shot from a couple nights of no sleep. "Mia, we need towels? Do you know where any are?"
Mia "Yeah, there are some in the laundry room from the bathroom that someone washed the other day. Should I go get them? Is a regular towel fine? There's that washcloth for the dishes in the sink though. But I wouldn't use that..."
Dick shrugs. "Ask Guy. I'm gonna go boil some water and make us some food."
Mia returns with a towel and heads out to check on the kids, giving them a wry smile as she leaves.
Dick makes the chili Damian had taken out with him yesterday and brings it and the supplies Guy needed out. "Thought this might be hearty enough to make up for missed meals."
Guy chuckles, "As long as Ollie didn't get his hands on it first to spice it up. Thanks, bro." He eats some of the chili, then stops, placing it aside as he remembers - what he has to do is going to be painful, and he doesn't want to lose his lunch from it. He takes the towel, wraps it around the wooden spoon, and dips it in the near-boiling water, then braces himself as he brings it close to the wound. In one motion he presses it to the infection, and holds it there, growling in pain through gritted teeth."
Dick winces in sympathy and turns away from Guy, setting down his own bowl to get what he'll need from the first aid kit. "Well, that's...certainly one way to do it."
Guy pulls away the cloth, panting a bit. "Draws the infection out...closer to th' surface..." he nods to him. "Do what ya gotta do. We can do the towel again if we need to."
Dick kneels down and starts to clean the wound with as little disinfectant he can use to still get the job done, pleased to see the dirt wash out. "Y'know, actually, I think it'll be OK now. What do you think? Need any more before I bandage it?"
Guy shakes his head, feeling lightheaded from the pain. Goddamnit, he was too used to his ring. "Nah, let's...leave it for now. If there's more puss later, I'll hit it with a hot towel again. Save the antiseptic."
He grins at Dick, "Real pretty, ain't it?"
Dick smirks. "Gorgeous." He kisses the top of Guy's knee and starts to dab petroleum jelly on the wound. "That'll make it heal faster." He looks it over one more time and bandages it. "There you go. All set. Now you sit back and eat and take these and you should be fine to rest. And that's all you're doing, got it?"
"What're you, my mother?"
Dick grins. "Careful, you don't start eating, I'll feed it to you."
"You can't be my mother. She'd never do that," he shoots him another wry grin and picks up the chili. "So what the hell happened out there? Last night, when you an' Damian were shouting?"
Dick chuckles and scoots up onto the couch with Guy, eating slowly. "I don't even know. Everything got dark and something was...coming at us. It was shaking the trees! And the noise was so loud, I almost couldn't hear myself think. I was going to stay and see what it was, but Damian was there and...." He shook his head. "I couldn't risk him getting hurt. We took off and fell off a cliff and landed by a VW bus." He rubs his face gingerly. "I'm gonna have a hell of a bruise, I can feel it."
Guy listens to his recounting of events as he finishes his chili. "Shakin' the trees...there can't be anythin' in the way of wildlife bigger than a buffalo, or maybe a moose, or elk...what kinda noise was it makin'?"
Dick stares ahead. "I don't know. It sounded...hungry. Just...growling and rumbling deeper than any animal I've ever heard before. It sounded like it could've been-- No, that sounds stupid."
Guy urges him to continue, "Go ahead, spill it. Less an' less about this place makes sense, so ya might as well."
Dick sighs and scoots a little closer. "It...sounded like the size of a blue whale moving on land. That doesn't make any sense, but that's the closest thing I can tell you for how big it sounded." He rubbed the back of his neck, the ghost of that sliminess from last night still lingering on his skin, even if he couldn't feel it now. "This place is like something out of a horror story."
Guy wraps an arm around Dick and grips his opposite shoulder, letting him know he's not alone, and safe, right this moment. "I...need to ask this, Dick. When that thing attacked you...did you see, or smell any blood?" Kyle was still out there, but if that thing that attacked Dick and Damian was out there too...
Dick thinks hard and rubs the back of his neck again unconsciously. "No. I don't remember any. Something... I thought something touched my neck and it was wet, but when I checked later, it didn't seem like blood."
Guy glances at the back of Dick's neck immediately. "No, I don't see anything there or on yer collar." He swallows hard. "Do you think he's still alive, Dick?"
Dick shrugs. "If he's run into that thing, I don't know." He meets Guy's gaze. "But, then again, you've been out there a while and haven't seen it, and Damian and I got away from it, so there's still a good chance. Maybe he made it to the other side of the forest, wherever that leads. Maybe he found some shelter he's holed up in."
"If you can find yer way back to that van, you should get the key off Bette or Steph. One of 'em found a car key yesterday. Drive it back here. An' someone oughta climb that tower and use the P.A. to call Kyle by name. Maybe he'll hear it, an' come back?"
Dick nods. "I think I can make it back there. It'd be good to go with a group, we could bring back the bikes, too." He frowns as a thought comes to him again. "Lian said that gate was closed when she was there yesterday, the one to the tower, but it was open when she took me there a little later. The kids were there with Mia earlier, right? I guess they could've closed it, but... I didn't think there was that much wind yesterday."
"I went up there once, but I know I shut it behind me."
Dick finishes his chili, not minding the way it's cooled from how long he's ignored it. "I think I'm going to go up there today. After a nap, I think. I feel kinda sick."
"And yeah, take someone with you. Not Damian. Take someone yer not gonna need to protect..." He eyes Dick closely, "Sick, how?"
"I don't know. Nauseous. Tired. Really tired. I'm usually better at running on little sleep, but..." He's slowly curling up on Guy as he talks, not really aware that he's doing so. "I feel too exhausted for what I've done. I don't know. Maybe I had some life scared out of me." He closes his eyes, resting his head on Guy's shoulder. "Lian found feathers yesterday in a hole by the siren. Weird feathers. I don't think they all came off the owls. I don't know."
Guy sighs. Dick's starting to fall asleep on him, and he knows he'll be drifting off himself, soon. It's clear to him, though, that Dick is in a head-space where he doesn't want to be alone, and Guy doesn't have it in his heart to deny him company. "Y'know, if we fall asleep here, on the couch, we're not gonna get a lot of that rest you were whinin' I needed so much of. I was gonna grab on of the lodging house rooms, no point in takin' up a bungalow when it's just me. ...You wanna give me a hand over there?"
Dick nods and carefully gets up. "Yeah, let me..." He holds the bowls, trying to figure out what to do with them. Finally, he decides he can at least soak them in the sink, and goes to leave them there. When he returns, he offers his shoulder to Guy to help him up. "You better rest once we get there, y'know. No sneaking off to go be heroic. That can come later."
"Oh...bite me," Guy grumbles.
Dick chuckles. "Don't tempt me. I have to rest, too, remember?"
Guy uses the stick Mia fetched for him earlier, leaning on Dick for the rest of the support he needed to keep the pain at a minimum. "Y'know somethin'? Every time that guy's been in trouble, he's always found some way out of it, either on his own, or with someone else's help. Every time. I don't know what I'm so worried about, he's probably out there, found some hot farmer's daughter or somethin' an' she's nursin' him back to health and bringin' him sweet tea. He'll be fine. Roy or Mar'i'll find him, you watch..."
Dick smiles and nods. "He'll come wandering back no worse for wear wondering why we're all panicking. Who knows? He's probably found the way out of here by now and is just trying to figure out how to get the message to us. I'm sure he's fine." Really, he had to keep thinking everyone would be fine. If they weren't.... That's not an option. Everyone is going to be fine. They reach the lodging house as easily as they can and find an empty bed, settling down on it. "Now you're going to be fine as long as you rest, OK?"
"Whatever ya say, Nagwing," he drawls, sitting on the bed heavily and removing his muddy, scratched-up loafers. He pulls off his shirt as well, and begins work on his trousers. "You stickin' around?"
Dick dusts himself off for distraction. "I don't have to if you don't want me to. I just thought maybe you'd like some company." He shrugged, biting his lip. "I know I could use some more."
Guy gives him a gentle smile, "I know you could. C'mon," he yanked the blanket off completely and turned down the sheet by way of invitation. "No kickin' my leg, or I'll punt you faster than you can say batarang."
Dick laughs and strips down, because god, his clothes are still dirty from the roll down the hill. He lays them out and crawls in bed, waiting for Guy to settle in before adjusting the sheet. "And no more solo adventuring, alright? From either of us, healed or not."
"Do ya see an 'R' on my chest or somethin'? Quit tellin' me what to do," Guy grumbles, but the point is taken. He can feel himself already starting to fall asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow, though the pillowcase feels unusually cool against his skin. Everything does. It's relaxing, relieving. He thinks of Kyle, resting in some Good Samaritan's bed, ready to send help back for them as soon as he can tear his eyes away from his sexy nursemaid. Guy thinks to himself, he'll sleep, then shower and change his bandages, and launder the clothes and linens. Maybe eat. Kyle better be back by then.
Dick chuckles softly and closes his eyes, resting a hand against Guy's chest. It's hot to the touch, but Dick settles down anyway sure that anything Guy's fighting will calm down after some good rest. He hopes Damian's actually listening to him and resting in a real bed, or at the very least, not running off into the forest again. As he drifts off, he rubs his neck one more time, flashes of his last dream coming up before he falls asleep again. This time, he won't remember his dreams.
“…but really, I’d have to say that with regards to the Riot of the Sugar Kingdom, Dumpling Dell should have been more active in promoting peace.”
Guy opened his eyes and blearily looked over to his right. Dick was lying on his side, his back to Guy, talking animatedly to thin air. Wonderful.
They’d been laid up in a safehouse in the middle of nowhere for a little over a week, but it was a week filled with sickness and lack of contact. Guy’s ring was running low on power and Dick’s communicator was on the fritz, so here they stayed, fevers and tempers running hot. At least their food supply was plenty and things were clean, so it wasn’t all bad.
Except when it was.
Three days in, Dick’s fever had spiked and sent him into a delirium. It had been a harrowing night, but things seemed to have calmed down by the next morning, just in time for Guy’s fever to do the same. Since then, neither of them had done much moving except for getting up for food and to use the small bathroom.
Guy rolled over, trying to see if maybe Dick was talking to someone or something he just couldn’t see. Not seeing anything, he tapped Dick’s shoulder.
“Hey, Guy! You’re awake.”
“Yeah… You all right, Dickiebird?” Guy watched him carefully.
“Yeah. Just killing time until you woke up.” Dick rolled over to face him. ”I’m glad you did. I was running out of silly things to say.”
As Dick kissed him firmly, Guy decided maybe staying cooped up wasn’t so bad after all.
The Choice May Have Been Mistaken, The Choosing Was Not
Chatzy log written with hotheadedlantern
Guy enters the cafeteria, looking around for Dick.
Dickiebird already has a table in an alcove by the window and a beer out for each of them. "Hey, Guy! Over here!"
Guy grins as he swaggers over in his uniform, "Hey, Dickiebird," he shakes his hand and slides into the opposite side of the booth. "Ah, my favourite kind of appetizer. A barley sandwich. Cheers," he takes the bottle after Dick opens it and clinks it to his. He's not standing on any ceremony as he lifts it to his lips and drains half of it, then slumps back in his seat and stretches out his legs under the table. "Long day. I needed that, thanks. You're lookin' a damn sight better than when I last saw ya. How's Damian?"
Dickiebird smiles. "He's doing fine. He's awake and demanding--he wants a zebra now, apparently--and Kyle healed his arm some, so it's doing better, too. I really hope he can come home tonight. Or at least soon."
Guy "That's great, Dick! And heh, demandin' good, that sounds like he's recoverin' well..." He waves over a worker, giving her pleading eyes for table service, and gets it. "Pork pad thai, medium spice, thanks."
Dickiebird "Your chicken tortilla soup and one of those half-loaves of sourdough, thanks!" He smiles as she walks away and turns back to Guy. "How's Hasaragua? Good? Same as last time I saw you, or...?"
Guy: "Hasa's still there, warrin' with itself. The hospital's finished, though. I'm kinda...tyin' up loose ends..." Guy tilted his head, wondering what Dick had called him here for. "You okay?"
Dickiebird squirms a little in his seat. "Yeah, I'm..." He turns his bottle in his hands, staring at it as he thinks. "I broke up with Bette. I don't know if you know that, or heard that, but I did, right before I left."
Guy doesn't want to admit that he can't remember if Kyle had mentioned it or not. He's been so busy, and literally immersed in a different culture for the last...how many weeks had it been? Heh, Marianela would know. "What happened? Why'd you...did she refuse to help you this time?"
Dickiebird "No, she... It wasn't fair to her, being with me, and I had to tell her. I'm still in love with someone else, more than I'm in love with her." He looks up at Guy, pointedly. "I guess I wasn't as over it as I thought."
Guy "I was kinda hopin' you weren't sure what you were sayin' when you had that breakdown an' told me." Guy leveled a look at him, "An' now you've gotten treatment, went away to contemplate an' stuff, come back, an' ya still feel yer in love with me? An' yer certain?”
Dickiebird shrugs and breaks eye-contact, looking back at his bottle. "Maybe I'm not. Maybe I'm just in love with the memory of you, what we had. I'm not too certain about a lot of things right now." He's grateful when the worker comes back with their food, distracting from the conversation for a moment. Stay decisive, bluebird, his inner-Ollie railed.
Guy finished his drink, wishing he had something stronger. "The memory of me. Dick, do you remember when 'us' was? It's been over six months since ...Darkseid took me away from you." He rubbed his forehead, feeling a headache coming on. "We said goodbye, Dick. You said you chose her. You were happy. I didn't want to fuck that up."
Dickiebird "Yeah, well, you didn't. I did." He takes a long breath and glances up at Guy. "How do you feel?"
Guy "Dick...don't do this."
Dickiebird: Maybe if I do it'll go away.
Dickiebird sighs. "Or if not...at least it's out in the open, y'know?"
Guy "Dick...I...I care about you, but I moved on. I let go of you. Look, I've had my own depression to deal with, and I HAD to move on. You told me we were done..." He shook his head, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you."
Dickiebird watches him closely and nods, processing. "I think it's time for that second beer. Just a sec." He heads over to grab them both another bottle, grateful for the short time to think alone. In truth, this has been lingering in the back of his mind for some time. He'd wanted Guy to move on when he was with Bette, and he couldn't just expect him to come back to him now. That wasn't fair to anyone. By the time he comes back with the beers, his smile is back on, even if it is a bit smaller than usual. "Guy, I'm...I'm glad. I really am. You've moved on, now I need to learn how to really do the same in a...healthier way than I did last time."
Guy felt so torn. Even if he was 100% certain he would still be around for the League in a few weeks, and not a civilian, this couldn't happen. Dick was young, he struggled with his own depression, and Guy knows he isn't what Dick needs. And Dick...even if Dick was the only one besides Kate who loved him, it just isn't right. "I don't know how much I can help, Dickiebird. But you will always have my support. Always. An' I'm real grateful for what we had. Ya saved me from myself, ya know. You gave me a lot o light durin' a totally dark time in my life. But I can't go back into that dark with you. You gotta come out on yer own, but I'll help, same as Kyle's helped me. And you. Both of you."
Dickiebird reaches across the table and takes Guy's hand. "We were good for each other. Maybe we're better for each other the way we are now. I don't ever want to lose your friendship, Guy. Even if we can't be anything more again... I'm glad we still have that."
Guy "Hey you know, give it some time, maybe even friends with benefits, Dick. Just...not now. You gotta trust me on this." He gives him a soft smile, "I'm glad we still have that too, man. You have no idea."
Dickiebird chuckles. "'Just not now.' That's what I told Bette. We could be together someday, just not...now. Well, at least we got that out there. We both know where we stand and that's... that's good. I'm trying to work on talking about how I feel and what I'm thinking. It's hard, but..." He smiles at Guy. "I had a good teacher."
Guy "You sure she won't change her mind?" he asks. "You only split up a little while ago, maybe you can bet back with her?
Dickiebird shakes his head. "Ah, no, I don't think so. Not for a while, if she does. I talked to her last night and she's very hurt and upset with me. Can't say I blame her, for sure. It really...came out of nowhere for her. In my efforts to keep her from getting hurt, I hurt her worse."
Guy sips his beer, "Sorry, Dick. Maybe given some time, like ya said..." He sighed, knowing his encouragement might not really be helping him. "Maybe runnin' solo might help ya, though? I mean, it's been hard for me, but lately I've gained a lot of perspective..."
Dickiebird nods. "Yeah, it might. I was kinda thinking about it, but... I'm not very good at being without someone to be close to. I don't do single well." He chuckles and eats some bread, eager to show Guy that he isn't so down on himself anymore.
Guy "Dickiebird, I ain't either...that's my point. Maybe ya gotta get good at it, because you sometimes don't have any control over that. Learn to be okay with bein' totally single. I dunno...maybe I don't know what the fuck I'm talkin' about. I really might not be the best one for givin' advice here. All I'm sayin' is, do what ya gotta do to learn to be happy, with or without someone in yer life." He smiles, "Look on the bright side, you probably won't be single long. You're the kind of person folks are drawn to."
Dickiebird pushes aside a dark thought as it threatens to pop up. "I have to be happy with myself before I can be happy with others. Or something like that, right?" He smiles. "How's it been for you on that front? I like the idea of getting some new perspectives."
Guy is taken aback. "Uh, well...I got a change of scenery. I lost everythin' I had, and I mean everythin'. I was down to just a handful of friends I could really call close, I was depressed again, an' it was gettin worse. An' then I was suddenly among people who lost even more than I had, and learned to be happy anyway. Kinda hard to feel sorry for yourself in all that. It's a little more complicated than that, an' I ain't sayin' 'go find yerself down an' out people so you can feel better about yerself' ...I only mean, that happened on its own, and bein' away from the kind of life I thought I oughtta have, made me stop wantin' it so bad to the exclusion of all alternatives."
Dickiebird "That's good! That's...kinda what my retreat to Japan did. Sometimes it's really nice to get away from where you were and that mindset. It's so easy to get trapped in the same thinking and the same things until you don't know what to do." He grins wryly. "And it's hard when you don't realize you're fighting yourself so much."
Guy isn't sure he understands that last part, about fighting oneself, but he decides it doesn't matter, since everything will be changing for him soon anyway. "Just...look forward, Dick. Not back." He finishes his second beer, and half his pad thai, before he's full and asks for the rest to be wrapped up.
Dickiebird finishes his food and nurses what's left of his beer. "Where you headed? Back to Hasaragua or are you gonna stay here for a bit?"
Guy "I need to be back tonight, but I got a few hours. Time at least for that third beer."
Dickiebird grins and fetches their third beers. "Great. Well, here's to looking forward, no matter where that leads."
Guy "Forward gear only, man," he clinks his bottle against Dick's.
