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REVIEW NOBODY CARES ABOUT: HIP TO THE JAVABEAN EDITION

ALSO, some of this was written in the morning, and some was at night. So, if the night part is really THAT MUCH more entertaining, I'll start writing these right before I sleep again

What’s in the Toaster?: NA/10

Honestly, I don't think it needs explaining

Sunbeam Light Show Flower Seed: 8/10

Good song, It's fun, it's catchy, it says the words "necktie" and "band" in the same song, which clearly means it references Tally Hall (it hypothetically could've been). Good

Musical Chairs: 7/10

Pros: it's a really good song

cons: he uses the word "bloody" the way a filthy brit would

jokes aside, It's a really good song but I just don't LOVE it, y'know

Atomic Copper Claw: 9.5/10

ILOVETHISSONGILOVETHISSONGILOVETHISSONG IDK how to explain it but the protagonist is so me I love them so much. Also, I wonder if the antagonist actually DOES have an atomic copper coat like the singer believes.

Your Evil Shadow Has a Cup of Tea: 8.75/10

I feel like this in an unpopular opinion (outside of the lemon demon fandom) but I LOVE this song. Definitely on elf my highlights from the album, it's stupid and sounds kind of bad. It's exactly what I want in a song.

Telekinesis: 8/10

In this album, my favorite three songs in a row are easily Telekinesis, Matches and Nails, and Relativity. Sure, I do like YESHACOT and Atomic Copper Claw more, but honestly it feels weird to separate the songs. It just feels natural to put those songs together. anyways hell yeah I love this song.

Matches and Nails: 8/10

The protagonist is kinda stupid with a horrible memory. Literally me (except that spot is already taken by the atomic copper claw guy)

Relativity: 8/10

I like, love love love the outdo of this song. Also, the chorus and pre-chorus are really fun and catchy! unrelated, but this album in my head feels really white. Not in a racial way, just. Like, when I think of this album I think of specifically the Minecraft polished quartz block.

Fancy Pants Manifesto: 8/10

If you haven't before, do yourself a favor and listen to this song with headphones in. It was a month or two before I listened to this song with headphones, and I was delighted when I heard the bridge and during that one part the synth bounced from ear to ear. Also, I didn't realize until the re-mastered version came out that at the beginning of the song Neil was saying "1, 2, 3, 4" and I thought he said "fancy pants, fancy pants" also this song reminds me of that one flash game

Go to Hollywood: 7.75/10

Love this song. It's great, and a sudden though appreciated change of pace from the rest of the album (kinda like clown circus' somnolence in terms of sound). This song used to be my favorite, but became overplayed in my head and ended up losing a good 1.25 points over time. Whoopsie!

I Know Your Name: 8/10

This song is an energetic, fun, hilarious masterpiece and anybody who tries to tell you the deporitaz/trapezoid version is better is WRONG.

Consumer Whore: 8/10

Kinda like go to Hollywood, this song became a little overplayed (though less so). I really like the second verse (cause it's funny) and the bridge (cause bridges are often my favorite parts of lemon demon songs)

Between You and Me: 8.25/10

I feel like this song is a perfect example of what I mean when I say the song is white. White like polished quartz, or almost-to bright pale LEDs. This song just feels really clean, almost weirdly "cleaner" than the lemon demon songs that came before it. Not that's bad, it's one of my favorite songs on the album. "Where cosmic placement failed / Where Serendipity drags her tail" is a FANTASTIC lyric (no I do not know what serendipity means I just think it's a big fancy word that sounds cool)

I’ve Got Some Falling to Do: 8/10

no need for explanation, it's a good song.

Sick Puppy

OKAY this song is so long, that it wouldn't do it justice to give it one rating so I've decided to split up the song into three sections

Sick Puppy (first instrumental section): 8/10

I know I said I don't really like instrumentals much, but this section is probably my favorite in the song. In fact, it may be one of, if not my favorite Lemon Demon instrumental. It's fun, it's energetic, and I especially love the section where it really picks up before transitioning into the second instrumental section.

SPEAKING OF THE SECOND INSTRUMENTAL SECTION.....

Sick Puppy (second instrumental section): ZERO OUT OF TEN (actual rating like 4/10)

GRR EW I HATE THIS SECTION IT RUINS THE INSTRUMENTAL SECTIONS AND IT RUINS THE WHOLE SONG I HATE IT IT SUCKS SICK PUPPY MORE LIKE SUCK(S) PUPPY

Sick Puppy (Guitar section): 6.5/10

meh

OVERALL: 8/10

FAVORITE/LEAST FAVORITE TRACKS

Atomic Copper Claw, Sick Puppy or Musical Chairs (depends on my mood)

Bonus Tracks

Almond: 7.25/10

good.

Bad Idea: 8/10

This song's pretty good. It's a fun song about zombies (WITHOUT THE ACCENT COUGH COUGH PEPPER AND SALT COUGH COUGH) but it kinda got overplayed. I still really like it though, and it has a great ending.

Behold the FUTURE: 7.5/10

overrated

Not Applicable: 7.75/10

Good, fun instrumental. Definitely my favorite instrumental on the album.

Roman Robot Statues: 7.5/10

yeah good song

Run, Harry, Run!: 8/10

WHAT THE FUCK WAS NEIL ON WHEN HE WAS WIRITNG THE LYRICS TO THIS SONG WHAT IN THE NAME OF HARRY POTTER COMPELLED NEIL TO WRITE THIS WEIRD ASS FANFICTION JESUS CHRIST. Also, good for him killing Dumbledore. You go, girl!

Take a Picture: 7.5/10

ehh its okay. don't love it. good song though

There’s a Robot in My Head: 6/10

This song is a great alarm. I know from experience.

OVERALL BONUS TRACK RATING: 7/10

FAVORITE/LEAST FAVORITE BONUS TRACKS

Either Run, Harry, Run, Bad Idea, or Not Applicable for my favorites. Least favorite is there's a robot in my head, easily.

#lemon demon #neil cicierega #hip to the javabean #httj #lemon demon album review #ines's album review

doodle of Molden Pistachio and some random new character I made named Kugo! Kugo Lemosun is Clown Circus. I don’t have much info but he’s babey

#jadesart #lemon demon #lemon demon ocs #lemonverse #lemonverse ocs #clown circus #cc #Live from the Haunted Candle Shop #lfthcs #Hip to the Javabean #httj

Lol at Leia teaching Luke some math and to think that this stuff is canon hahahhaa and wth is this Vader's Many Prosthetic Parts song and saying that our fave Sith Lord has no sense of humor hahahahahahha

#httj #skywalker twinsies #darth vader humor?!!!!!