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Which headline style is best? Caps, or no caps?

Which headline style is best? Caps, or no caps?

Today, we deal with headline style, caps or not, the old bugaboo of it vs. they, and clichés.

Original headline

PETEDGE Announces launch of its new website for its Pet Professionals Grooming Supplies and Equipment business

Note the mixed use of some capital letters and some lower or sentence case. ‘Announces’ is capitalized for some unknown reason but ‘launch of its new website is not.’ 

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Back from a Covid-19 break, with news release edits

Back from a Covid-19 break, with news release edits

This blog has taken a break during ‘shelter in place,’ as criticizing others’ work seemed out of place, and it was a time for a Sixties-ish ‘smile on your brother’ ethos. As the crisis appears to display some light at the end of the tunnel, it was time to get going again as the editorial scourge of the U.S. and Canadian PR Newswires. In addition, a draft of my second writing book, How to Be a…

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PR Tools: Quidditch anyone? What’s a flagship store, Harry Potter?

PR Tools: Quidditch anyone? What’s a flagship store, Harry Potter?

Original headline

Warner Bros. To Open First Ever Harry Potter Flagship Store In New York

Becomes…

Warner Bros. to Open Harry Potter Flagship Store in New York

‘It is usual that the opening of a flagship store marks the first development of a retail store portfolio within a luxury fashion retailer’s most important foreign markets.’ — Collins English Dictionary

‘First ever’ is…

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PR Tools: Quidditch anyone? What’s a flagship store, Harry Potter?

PR Tools: Quidditch anyone? What’s a flagship store, Harry Potter?

Original headline

Warner Bros. To Open First Ever Harry Potter Flagship Store In New York

Becomes…

Warner Bros. to Open Harry Potter Flagship Store in New York

‘It is usual that the opening of a flagship store marks the first development of a retail store portfolio within a luxury fashion retailer’s most important foreign markets.’ — Collins English Dictionary

‘First ever’ is…

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PR Tools: Three word repeats in a headline, four in a lead – how to reduce 25 per cent

PR Tools: Three word repeats in a headline, four in a lead – how to reduce 25 per cent

Word repetitions are easy to catch: don’t repeat the same word in the same sentence or in an adjacent phrase. Even avoid reiterating a word elsewhere in a news release. In the following example, ‘plant-based’ was duplicated three times in a headline and four times in a lead. Remarkable. Must be a PR newswire record. Applying PR tools, it wasn’t easy to edit out those references, as some might be…

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PR tools: Bread slices—or slices of bread? Dempster’s news release is toast

PR tools: Bread slices—or slices of bread? Dempster’s news release is toast

Dempster’s, a bread brand I like and buy, made a large donation to a food bank and raised an interesting question; when describing large quantities of sliced bread, is it best to quantify it in slices or loaves? I’d be curious about opinions from interested readers. In a few short steps, this PR Tools news release benefited from easy and basic Better Writer edits and reconsidered emphasis. 

Or…

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PR Tools: news release ignores the news! Edits needed!

PR Tools: news release ignores the news! Edits needed!

Once again, a paid news release, the essential PR Tool, is issued, and ignores the most essential news development, preferring to describe company achievements before getting to the reason for sending the release over PR newswires.

Headline and editsA. Nextleaf Solutions Adds Former Health Canada Inspector Dr. Sherry Boodram to Board of Directors B. Nextleaf Solutions adds Dr. Sherry Boodram,…

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PR Tools: Fire Prevention, a good cause, extinguished with poor news release copy

PR Tools: Fire Prevention, a good cause, extinguished with poor news release copy

In this news release, definitely for a good cause, there are several instructive writing tips that shorten the headline and lead, but also add clarity. 

Original headline

Trainers from Firefighters Without Borders Headed to Lac Seul First Nations this Month to Educate Residents on Fire Prevention & Ensure All Residents Have A Working Smoke Alarm (28 words)

Better PR Writer edit

Traine…

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