#husk character study

[unholyangeldust]

Tonight I’m thinking about Angel Dust telling Husk in Masquerade “I don’t need you to save me”

and in Scream Rain Husk telling Cherri Bomb that what he internalized from that is that “[Angel] doesn’t need me”

Thinking about Husk’s resigned statement also in Scream Rain that he himself is “not worth saving”

Thinking about how Husk’s value of his own worth over and over again shows in how successfully he helps other people:

trying to help Chaggie make up

trying to get Angel redeemed

trying to be the therapist in group therapy sessions

don’t get me started on the complexities of which show up in his relationship with Alastor I will completely derail this post

Husk resents being needed and people wanting things from him for several reasons, and one of those reasons is that he knows his success in meeting those wants and needs is how he measures himself. He resents needing and wanting from others for the same reason; anyone he cares about and feels solely affection for, he doesn’t want to make them feel like how it makes him feel.

[unholyangeldust]

I like Huskerdust most when the way Husk feels for Angel transforms Husk’s internal landscape

Not like “oh I can feel love again and therefore I’m fixed”

But like “holy shit this motherfucker is broken. Just look at him. What a disaster. We’re both messes, both made terrible choices, in a Hell of our own making…he still shines so bright. All that bullshit and he ain’t emptied out yet, huh? …fuck. Maybe I still got something inside me, too.”

Husk and Angel Dust as mirrors for one another. Where light strikes the surface and bounces back, where they see their flaws AND their strengths.

Angel’s not trying to change Husk’s life but his ongoing proximity is enough for Husk to see himself differently.

And it pisses Husk the fuck off because wow that’s some scary vulnerability to have but that’s another post