There’s Another Dawning
Written for swallowsmateforlife
Rating: Teen and up
Wordcount: 20,945
Relationships: Liam Payne/Harry Styles
Additional tags: Alternate Universe - Bakery, Alternate Universe - Small Town, Coming of Age, Anxiety
It's not that Liam's never met anyone with Harry's traits. He's met nice people. He's met people who were goofy, who had long hair. He supposes he met Zayn and Louis earlier that day, so he's met other people with tattoos. It's not those things, it's just that Harry is more than everyone else, he's different in a way Liam can't put into words. Liam feels more like himself around Harry. He didn't realise he wasn't feeling like himself before.
1. "This news couldn't wait?" Liam continues, as he's handed Louis's belt. "Or be texted or anything?"
"Absolutely not!" huffs Louis, nearly tripping over his own feet as he changes from jeans into slacks. He's wearing Marvel superhero underwear, which strangely makes Harry miss Zayn. "This is news, Liam, person-to-person, face-to-face news."
2. He doesn't have to agonise for very long over whether or not to contact Niall, though, because before dinner that night, his phone buzzes. And then buzzes again, which means it's ringing. Looking up from the competitive cooking programme that's playing on TV, Liam answers it. "This is Liam speaking."
"Hey, you," says Niall, and Liam gets a buzz similar to the one his phone makes, only it appears to have been generated entirely by his own silly feelings. "How are you?"
3. Blinking, Zayn looks up. Niall is sitting cross legged on the carpet with his back against the bed, laptop on his knees, half-eaten box of chinese takeaway sitting by his disconnected mouse. (Niall's always favoured the trackpad). His hair is soft and mussed and Zayn resists the urge to reach over and push it out of his face.
SOOOO eva nothanksweregood and i have been back-and-forthing about a werewolf pack ot5 au since liike the end of july? and we finally cleaned up a bit enough to post so. HAVE FUN WITH THIS. (warning for trauma + nightmares/night terrors.)
for a little while only louis knows about niall’s nightmares but he can't do everything at once, and he knows the others would only want to help and they're pack now, niall - but niall is so adamant: “no no please, please, louis... please don't tell them, i'll be fine, they're gettin' better, i promise, please lou?”
louis stares him down. "i know you're scared," he says. sighs. "think about it, at least, okay?"
then it happens one night when louis is out for a few hours - a rare occurrence - so it’s just zayn, harry, and niall home.
and they hear this TERRIBLE scream. wakes both of them right up and they're both heavy sleepers. zayn clears the room and is into niall's in two breaths, harry close behind him, and. niall's just on the bed, back arched, mouth open, screaming
harry takes one look and says "i'll call lou." zayn is hovering, terrified, doesn’t know what's going on, is this - is this a spell, is someone torturing niall??? should he try and ?? touch???? hold him??? he doesn't know what to do and it's freaking him out. it could be so many things. he hates feeling helpless.
finally, he does the only thing he can think of and gets up close to niall and says loudly and firmly, “NIALL! niall, ENOUGH.”
and niall comes awake with a gasping sob. he takes in zayn above him and harry hovering in the doorway and chokes, turning away to hide his face in the pillow.
"niall," says zayn softly, still not sure if touching is a good idea. this is so heartbreaking for him. "niall, babe," he murmurs, "sunshine... what's wrong? are you in pain?"
"'m fine, just a bad dream, nothin' t' worry about."
zayn looks crushed, "you're crying, niall, you were screaming in your sleep." cautiously, he sits down on the edge of niall’s bed
“no, it's fine, honest, louis'll tell you, it happens all the time it's -” niall realises abruptly that that was probably not the right thing to say.
niall shrugs, still not looking up. “didn’t want t’ bother you, i reckon.”
zayn not being able to keep himself back from reaching out and - slowly, so niall can always see his hands, gathering niall up in a warm hug, not too tightly just yet. “you’re never bothering me, sunshine,” he murmurs. “i swear, niall, never.”
niall doesn’t say anything, but his hands come up and he grasps at zayn’s shirt, choking a muffled sob into zayn’s shoulder.
louis getting back, after that first nightmare he was gone for, having broken about forty traffic regulations to get home that same night, and bursting into the room to find zayn holding niall bridal style in his lap, harry holding one of niall’s hands. running over to the bed, peppering kisses all over niall's face, 'babe, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry nialler, i should have been here, are you okay?'
and then in the next couple weeks harry having sympathetic nightmares and creeping into niall's room late at night, tears screwing up his face, and nuzzling into niall's side, falling asleep with his hand resting over niall’s heart because he needs to feel the steady, untroubled beat.
louis sleeping outside of niall's door for a week after the whole thing, just on the off-chance that niall would have another nightmare. he’d have to wait until niall was asleep so he could sneak out with his blanket and curl up on the floor outside. zayn finding him there for the sixth night in a row and shaking his head so, so fondly and reaching down to pull him up, dragging him back to bed and tucking him in with the softest brush of a kiss.
niall wandering around like a zombie the next day with bags under his eyes, refusing to meet any of their gazes. they always try to get him to talk about it but he never does, always seems hushed and hesitant and - the worst thing is when harry goes to give him a cuddle and niall flinches away, like he forgot where he is for a second; like he forgot who harry is.
and then the first time it happens when liam is there.
liam - as latest addition to the pack, who’s only been there a couple months - sleeps lightly, always had to be aware of sounds and danger - he's only just learning to sleep through harry’s snoring and the way louis passes liam’s room to go to the bathroom in the night. so when there's a distinctive but quiet whimper from niall’s room, he sits bolt upright. when another comes, a little louder, liam gets out of bed and goes to check.
by the time he gets there, the smell of fear is overpowering. niall is curled up with his teeth sunk into his pillow, shaking and crying and it’s the worst thing liam’s ever seen (and liam’s seen some less-than-great stuff). he has no idea what to do so obviously he runs to louis-and-zayn’s room and wakes them up. normally he would hate doing that but it's for niall, isn’t it?
louis seems immediately quite awake and concerned when liam shakes him; zayn just seems grumpy and tired, until they hear why liam’s here. zayn’s face goes serious. he turns to louis.
louis has leapt into action, already heading for the door. "zayn, go get a glass of water for him, i'll go in and wake him up."
“what's going on?” liam wants to ask, but instead he follows louis back to niall’s room.
the waking up process is awful, because niall doesn't seem to realise he's awake, at first, and he struggles against louis, lashes out - when louis says, "niall, petal, it's just me, no one is here to hurt you," niall breaks into terrible sobs. he lets louis gather him up this time, clings to him, really, and liam just. stands there feeling useless and confused and so so sad that niall is this upset. liam doesn't know niall’s history - has definitely never seen niall this upset before. zayn comes back upstairs with the glass of water louis asked for; rests it unobtrusively on the dresser and puts a hand on liam's shoulder. "c'mon," he tells liam very softly. "we just need to wait. louis'll call us."
so the two of them, joined by harry a couple minutes later looking sad and still sleepy, sit out in the hall. let louis talk niall down. in a hushed voice, zayn explains to liam some of what happened to niall, what his first pack was like. liam’s first experiences with packs was pretty awful too, but nothing to what zayn’s telling him about niall’s. has never felt so gut-wrenchingly, lovingly hurt for someone else, ever, in his life; s'poses he's never been close enough to anyone for it. it fills him with a kind of courage but it's also so, so painful.
it’s at least a half hour later when louis calls softly that they can come in. they’re all a little hesitant, because sometimes niall doesn’t want to see anyone right after a really bad nightmare, but when they’re all inside niall looks up from where he’s lying back against louis’ chest, looking exhausted but mostly peaceful, and stretches out his arms. harry nearly trips and falls face first onto the carpet, recovering enough to scramble onto the bed instead, clinging fiercely around niall’s waist. “love you,” he says into niall’s stomach. “love you so much.”
zayn sits on the edge of the bed, leaning in to press a long kiss to niall’s forehead. “y’alright, babes?” he asks, gentle, glancing at louis to include him in the question. louis gives him a half smile back; looks almost more worn out than niall. louis frees one hand from where it’s trapped between harry and niall and reaches out to zayn, gripping tight.
liam hesitates at the foot of the bed, not quite knowing where he fits. he reaches out, rests a hand on niall’s ankle. “can i - is there anything i can do to help you?”
niall shakes his head, tilts his head up against louis’ chest pleadingly. louis rubs a thumb across niall’s stomach in response, says to liam, “niall doesn’t usually feel up to talking just yet, but he’d love a good liam-cuddle.”
harry rolls over to make room, and niall settles an arm tightly around liam as he rests his head on niall’s thigh, careful to avoid his bad knee.
“c’mon, zayn, plenty of room yet,” louis says, light, and slides them down so they’re lying flat, the outside edge left for zayn.
zayn reaches over and switches off the lamp, “‘night, lovelies,” he says softly, before curling himself around his lads and letting sleep take him.
i know that you are more into paylinshaw that gryles but for the fic meme can i request gryles, marriage au? xx
There’s silence for a moment, a long moment, long enough that Harry’s hands start to shake where he holds them in his lap, and then Pete huffs out a breath and says, “Well, I mean, might as well, since he’s so bloody gone over you he’ll probably never look at anyone else again.”
Harry’s ability to breathe returns to him in a great rush, and he manages, “So…we have your blessing?”
Face softening into the closest thing to affection Harry’s ever seen from Pete, he nods, “Yeah, lad, you do.”
“You sure you’re not coming in?” asks Liam when he resurfaces, flicking his dripping hair out of his eyes; it’s long enough now that the curl starts to creep back in when it’s wet, and Nick loves it to pieces. Loves everything the water does to Liam, the way it darkens the hair on his forearms and chest, and how it makes his eyelashes stick together, and the way it rolls off his shoulders and down his back, and how much it makes him smile.
“Nah,” Nick replies, sitting back on his chair and taking another sip from the ridiculously long, curly straw Harry stuck in his drink, “I’m good watching.”
(THIS WAS MEANT TO BE 3 SENTENCES AND I BETRAYED YOU AND I’M SORRY)
There’s silence after Niall speaks, the two of them sitting on the edge of the treehouse, Louis’s legs dangling over into the space between the leaves and the ground. The night air is cold and it tugs at Niall’s stomach, at all the little threads of anxiety there waiting to be woven into something else.
“How do you know?” asks Louis, turning Niall’s hand over in his own, running his fingers over Niall’s palm like he’s pulling them through water. Everything in Niall’s body feels brimming with it, like his veins are usually half-empty and he doesn’t realise until they’re full. He wants to let his eyes flutter closed but he can’t tear his gaze from Louis’s face long enough to do it.
“I don’t know how to not,” answers Niall, and Louis’s fingernails scrape a little across the soft junction of his thumb, the feeling like sandpaper, like an itch and a tickle and a sigh. Louis lets go of Niall’s hand, sits back a little so they’re no longer touching, even though the air between them feels so thick they might as well be. “Don’t know what it would be like to not.”
Below them, across the yard and in the house, the party continues, as bright and warm as ever. Niall feels they have the best of both worlds, near and far from it, both a part of it and observers on the outside. They can go back whenever they want. He knows Liam is probably dancing inside, and Harry has probably found his way into the kitchen, and Zayn has probably found someone’s lap to put his head in, someone to run their fingers through his hair.
And Niall’s with Louis, in Harry’s treehouse, where Louis always seems to be whenever something very important has just happened to him. This isn’t the first time Niall has found him up here. It’s nice feeling like Louis wouldn’t rather be somewhere else.
“Soulmates,” Louis tries out loud, talking to the tree branches dangling over their heads rather than looking directly at Niall. The word sounds heavy and powerful on his tongue. “Soulmates.” He tilts his head. “I just… I thought. Don’t know what I thought, really, but… I thought I’d see some flash of light, or, be able to see a new colour, or something. That’s how people make it sound.”
Niall reckons this is better. “Are you disappointed?” he asks.
Louis turns to him, “No! No, I’m. No.” His voice goes soft. “No, Nialler… is that what you’re worried about?”
Shrugging, Niall tugs at one of his shoelaces, tries to fight the desire to bite at his nails. The thing is, for ages they thought Harry was going to be Louis’s soulmate, woke up every day wondering if today was it, if today was the day something would change. Last year, before Liam met Sophia, they wondered if it might happen with him, too. Zayn had shaken his head and said “I love you, Louis, but it’s not us.” And they’d believed him. Louis had never asked Niall.
“A bit. Just want you to be happy.”
“I’ve never been this happy,” Louis promises, and Niall could almost cry, almost almost almost. “It’s just a lot to take in. Can’t believe I’m enough for you, really. C’mere?”
Louis’s arms are open, and the breeze bites at Niall’s ears again, and at last he sees everything he needs to in Louis’s face; the fear and the hope and something else, something deeper, something clear blue and tied to the back of Niall’s chest. Louis’s too, by the looks.
He shuffles over, rests his chin on Louis’s shoulder, his arms around Louis’s waist. Louis’s arms go around his neck, Louis’s cheek in his hair. The elastic between them isn’t so tight when they’re pressed together like this.
“Glad it’s you, if this is what it feels like,” Louis breathes.
NOUIS KIDFIC (which is... i guess not an au anymore but i still want it please!!!)
Everything is fine and normal, considering this is Niall’s first-ever time babysitting for Louis in the whole time they’ve been officially dating, and considering how his heart leapt into his throat at the chance, and considering how strange it is to be alone in Louis’s house with Louis’s daughter - anyway, considering all that, everything is completely fine, and normal, until it’s bedtime and she’s curled up under her Avengers blanket, and Niall’s just about to leave when she reaches for him and mumbles, “Dad?”
Niall’s heart stops for a brief moment; he turns and gently takes her little outstretched hand, saying softly, “No, darlin’, s’ Niall… do you want me to stay til you go to sleep?”
Her little brow furrows, but she nods, and trying to push past the heart-racey feeling of ‘Dad’, of the possibility that he might - maybe, one day - possibly… Niall sits down on the edge of her bed and waits.
“Sorry, I know this stings,” murmurs Liam, as he’s rinsing the gravel out of the grazes - and he’s bloody right, it stings so much Louis can feel tears pricking in his eyes, but he tips his head back and ignores them as best he can. Instead he focuses on the softness of Liam’s big rough hands against his calf, the little pattern of tiles around the ceiling of Liam’s bathroom, the security of it only being the two of them there; the next best thing to Louis being by himself.
“I’m never skateboarding again,” he says, and Liam’s laugh shows that neither of them believe it for a second.
