Dare to dream I Think
Good morning and welcome to the morning. Haha I crack myself up sometimes. Ah shit it is the afternoon, my inside joke is ruined. Thanks a lot clock. Damn it my ball is stuck to my thigh. Awesome wake up Broland, just awesome. I feel like I have been asleep forever, or like a few months perhaps. Am I a bear? Like a hibernating bear creature of the night. Why of the night? I don’t even know is that part of the hibernation process that I just think random things and therefore I am thinking them and by thinking them they are in my head and inside my head are the thoughts that I ma thinking and the voices are answering my thoughts? No, no that can’t be true. I have no answers. I best keep this to myself. I sound fucking crazy.
I am hungry, like a bear. I mean no, not at all like a bear. I am not a bear, I am not a bear, mmmm honey, faaaaaark! No, wait, I don’t like honey, get off my hand honey jar, you disgust me. All sticky and not made by my body, only my body makes my hand sticky! Ah right, too much, moving along. I am not a bear. Raaaaaaarrrrr hehe bears go raarrr. Damn it! I must cease with the bear things. Unless it is a word conundrum in which I am meant to bare all to someone or something… Puzzling, I am puzzled. This actually makes sense, all of it. The sleeping, the thinking I am a bear, yes, yes it is all becoming clear to me, I am not a bear! I am the almighty Broland hear me roar!!! But not like a bear. Oh hey Luck, stop licking your arsehole while staring at me, you know I hate that.
What’s on the menu for work today? Luck, stop eating your brown doughnut and bring me my schedule. On second thought I do not want you carrying it over to me with that mouth of yours. I may have seen where it has been but I am damn sure it has been other places I want to I mean do not want to think about right now. Maybe later. Hmm it seems my diary has the same thing written in it for everyday this week. Catch Dr Ginger Mittens. That makes no sense though. To this point he/she/it/that/pumpernickel has only done minor inconveniences to me and my sidekick kitten Luck. Strange that I would have written this in for my week, strange that it is not in my handwriting, strange that there is cat hair all in my weeks schedule. I wonder what this means… Luck! We have a mystery to solve. The mystery of the writing in my diary!
I am still hungry. Luck, bring me some fresh salmon from that new running stream we have in the front room. No wait… wait a minute something is not right… I don’t even like salmon. Let’s go out for lunch, we can discuss the case. Kletsgorightnowdownthestairsandoutthedoortotheplacewearegoingtohavelunchthatisnotthewoodsbecausewearenotbears. Awww yeah, speed thinking, I can do that, I just did it; it has now been done by me. I also invented it, probably. Ah yes, of course, my clothes, back upstairs let’s have toast. Quickly now, the people are staring. They are impressed. Their screaming and hysterics tell me so. I must strike a super hero pose, my public needs to see. Oh we are inside, we are having toast. Good job Luck, you made me toast. Bears don’t eat toast, lucky I am not a bear. Remind me to buy a bear suit, I want to be a bear.
Ok Luck, where were we? Why are we in the jungle? The urban jungle that is, tricked you pretty good there didn't I luck, didn't I, yes I did. I tricked you so good. You were all like, hey, jungle, what jungle and I was like bam! Urban jungle bitch. But I digress. Actually I don’t digress I don’t even know where I was going or what I am doing. Let’s do something luck, you decide. Get lunch you say? That is an excellent plan, though it will be a late lunch since the clock fucked me over as we previously discovered. What I already ate toast? When? Hmmm I will trust you as there are crumbs on my lap and a half eaten loaf of bread on the table in front of me and I am no longer hungry… Logic suggests you are correct. Ok, that is enough naked toast eating, hey stop that, those crumbs are not for you. No, no, do not go to phase two tripod, remain calm that is clearly not human but a sandpaper tongue… never mind, clean that up. I am going to get my hat we are heading outside into the wilderness I mean city. What the fuck is with my mind on nature. I am not a bear!
Luck, what time is it? I have totally lost track where we are at in this day. Afternoon you say? Can’t read a clock you say? You are just a kitten you say? I like kittens. But I question ginger mittens. Ginger Mittens hmm those two words seem familiar to me, but where have I heard them before hmmm Puzzling. Oh well I am sure it will come to me at some stage later on today. What it is dinner time. Where has this day gone? Seriously, where has it gone I am pretty sure I just woke up, discovered I was not a bear, had some toast, discovered that you like crumbs and your tongue is like sand paper, dirty, rough mmm no wait do not go to phase two, abort, abort, ah aborted this time. Where was I, ah yes, I was in the forest hunting for oh no, no no no, I was not in the forest, don’t play trick on me my own mind, tricky little devil you are. What bed time, luck, already? Are you serious? What do you mean I am in bed, this certainly has been an interesting day. I think. Have I even gotten out of bed? It’s morning? Did I dream all of that? Yes, I must have it is a new day, I just woke up from one night’s sleep so I am not a bear. Established, dreaming mystery solved. I think I will have some toast, with pants on.