Resolution
C’mahji and Lefay were midway through their excursion to prove his worth as a mate, and he had something he had to take care of. Alone.
He took care as he extricated himself from both the bedroll and her grasp. It was midnight, or shortly thereafter, in the La Noscean jungle. The moon was full and high above head, though the jungle was pitch black around them. He pulled on his leather leg armor and his boots, but left behind the rest. He would not be gone long.
He picked his way carefully through the thick underbrush, using his ears and hands more than his eyes to guide him through the darkened but familiar jungle. It took him longer than he would have liked, but soon enough he found himself at the river, and a few hundred yards away from the base of the waterfall. He sucked in a breath, steeled himself, and approached.
While he walked he reached up to his throat, undoing and then removing one of the necklaces that he wore. It was made of a leather that was black as the night sky, decorated with a moon charm and various blue gemstones. He held it in his hand as he approached, and did his best to keep that hand from shaking.
Finally, he arrived at his goal: a headstone. Simple and even crude in its design, but it had worked at the time. The name ‘Sizha Jaab’ had been chiseled into the rockface and was barely worn down. At the base of the gravestone was a necklace much like his own - but with a lighter tanned leather, a sun charm, and various yellow or orange gemstones.
He stood before the marker for a moment before he knelt down on one knee, and then on both. He grasped his necklace in both his hands, and rested it against his lap. He was silent for a long while.
“I am sorry I have not visited you,” he finally began, his voice likely unheard to any but himself. The waterfall to his right was deafening, “It is not for lack of want. I tried to avenge you and lost. I was shamed and banished, and further shamed when I was too afraid to return to visit as I promised I would.”
“You told me, on the night that I lost you, to keep my necklace only as long as I needed to let my heart heal. I assumed it never would. I have worn it endlessly. Every day. Every night.”
He held the necklace up in front of him, studying it for a moment as he fell back into silence, tried to consider his next words carefully. He never had been good at them. He lowered the necklace back down.
“You told me that, when my heart healed, I need to return the necklace to you, to pair with the one you had planned to wear.”
He sucked in a steadying breath and leaned forward, placing his necklace down beside hers on the ground. The fact that it had never been disturbed was a miracle, and one he was glad for.
“Azeyma, or perhaps Menphina, has blessed me with someone. I met her by chance, and I fell in love with her before I knew what was happening. She is gentle, and kind, and encourages me when I would rather wallow, guides me back to the right path when I start to lose it. She has found the broken pieces of my heart and mended them.”
He sat back on his legs again after having put the necklace down, and was not surprised to feel tears rolling down his cheeks, though his voice did not crack. He felt resolved. At peace.
“You were my first love, and I will never forget you, Sizha Jaab. You were the moon and stars to my sun. I hope you are resting well.”
He flicked an ear backward, at the sound of a soft voice. Lefay. How had she tracked him? He wiped his eyes hastily and cleared his throat. It was time to talk to her about this, and exorcise the last of his demons…
