Created for a diplomatic mission that needed another background character who was a martial fighter, but who has become a vital and staple member of the focal location of my D&D world-build.
Fear is coming in as both our Gay Pride character and as I had originally intended before it was suddenly June, an exercise in my studies of CBC's Lesson 1.5: Hair for Thought. Find character building processes, original sketch, and backstory below the cut!
He is Gay Romantic and Demisexual. He is slow to love, loyal and steadfast in his love, and lets heartbreak linger a little too long. My default for characters is bisexual and polyamorous until proven otherwise unless I have a specific plan for them. I did not have a specific plan for Fear's sexuality and let him guide me. He guided me to one of @ceruleanties' characters named Hank, a dilf of a graviturgy wizard with a kind heart and smile. I related personally to the stubbornness and aversion to change that Fear was developing as a character, and re-imagined it alongside a Demi identity as well [I do not identify as demi myself but my allo identity is in question often enough in my head that demi is relatable to me plentifully].
Fear's physical design went through some iterations before becoming what it is here. His first design was rather generic, as I was just wanting to draw a randomized character design. I used a tail and horn art reference chart from DeviantArt to design him, and I notated that he had dark blue skin and cyan accents and drew him in a generic leather outfit that was notated as being white with simple straps/belts.
When I started looking for characters in need of overhaul for CBC's course I was looking primarily at dark brown characters like Finley who were designed with a human or human approximate skin tone, but without a racial intention. However, I noticed that as a dark-skinned man, he also may have needed attention, despite not having a human skin tone. Other things about the importance of his faith and the community he adopts and protects also reminded me of positive tropes associated with strong Black characters, and I felt the change would honor that.
In regards to Lesson 1.5 and his hair specifically, I have pictured above two styles - sponge twists and long locs in a bun. I came up with these two very different styles in response to two very different times in his life.
For his younger years living in the cold depths of Hell, when keeping up appearances and masking his identity in a false persona of violence and anger, he took time to style and color his natural cyan-white hair into a black-tipped sponge twist and kept it short for the mercenary-style work that he did so that it would stay out of his way. The style was about appearances - something he could put effort into controlling while the untrained eye would see it as effortless.
After he dropped the toxic masking of his youth, Fear moved out of Hell and adopted a community, giving him time to heal and grow -spiritually and mentally. His protected locs represent the growth and healing he found in that recovery. They are something he nurtures, showing that he isn't just a warrior and protector of his community, but also learning to protect himself.
I have *a lot* more to say about Fear. As well as a lot more research to do on his characterization and probably on his design. For example, I discovered while writing this that I have research to do on the specific fashion choices I've made for him and the ramifications that have for him as a Gay Black character. He means so much to me and his story is near and dear to my heart. I love him so much and he keeps coloring outside the lines and throwing me new surprises.
