i think tonight's sad post is about how jean’s illness is still very much there and detrimental to how she lives to the point that she is very uncapable of doing strenuous physical activity ( she can only run an extremely short distance before she becomes winded and starts gasping for breath & coughing ) which means she hasn’t been able to really dance in a long time , which was a big part of her . the ballet / ballerina ( motifs , as well as physically being a ballerina ) were a large part of her . and its evident that she is still a dancer , she walks with a dancer’s grace , like its ingrained into the very core of her being . she’ll often spin along or do small dance steps to songs as she works , but she can’t do long , strenuous , practices or performances anymore . that aside , in general she is still easily fatigued and weak . she gets tired easily , she can fall asleep anywhere , she even still has the odd fainting spell occasionally , as well as coughing spells . they are usually far and few inbetween , but they still crop up and take her by surprise and leave her weak and weary for awhile .