#ifinallysaidit

[its-lolla0219]

I have never known how it feels to need you, I swear if I did I would have called and you would have been here, I wouldn't even have to call, you would just be here. I want to forgive you, I want to be able to relate to you without having to wonder if what I feel is normal, I love you, indifferent but I do, I know because even if you are so detached from me, I feel your heartbeats in my soul, you created me and I sit here and wonder... I feel your inhales when I am sleeping at night...

[theunknown760]

I want you to ask me "How are you?"

And I want to respond with the truth about how I really am. What im really feeling. I want to tell you how shitty I feel. I want to tell you that im tired of everything and that I dont want to be here anymore. I dont want to feel like a slave. I dont want to look at myself and not feel comfortable with what I see. I dont want to see everyone around me doing something with their lives and me feeling like im in quicksand not being able to do shit. Im stuck and I dont like it. I dont like who I am becoming. I dont like how I feel. I dont like that im alive. But no , if you asked me “how are you?” I’ll respond with “I’m fine” because that’s just how I am. Im not fine though, I feel trapped within myself and im tired.

[theindifferentsoul]

I hate eating. It's not like I chose this life. So many people talk about having a love of food and always eating but we neglect to talk about those who just can't eat. It's not like I don't want to eat or have a body image complex. I just don't like food. I sit down for 30 min to an hour everyday and try to force myself to eat. I'm trying to defeat whatever it is I have. So since the first of this year I've gained 9 lbs and all I need is 15 more lbs to get to my goal weight (145). I just wanted to address the fact that 1. Guys can have issues with eating 2. It's hard as hell to gain weight when all these people are always talking about loosing. Hell I wish my problem was trying to lose weight.

[wandslingerofka]

Can I get something out of my chest?

Ok, now that I have a tumblr, I can say this loud and clear: I DON'T KNOW WHY PEOPLE FUSS ABOUT JAMES AND LILY. I have nothing against the people who likes them, but it is my personal opinion. But seriously? Ok, they are Harry's parents and all. Let me analyze them as two people and not Harry's parents. Lily was a saint. I didn't like her at all. I don't like people that did not do stuff, that have no defects, that is just there, like a Virgin Holy Mary. And James. OMG JAMES. He was just an arrogant kid, that bullied people for no reason. Ok, a loyal friend, if you see what he did for Lupin. But it is like, I expected that. The rest, just an arrogant kid. The books/movies did not pass me more than that. And I don't feel guilty anymore for not being interested in the Marauder's Era.

[i-know-it-sounds-crazy]

Remember that time I called you beautiful and you called me handsome? All in the name of joking love? Yeah I'll never forget that even if we were joking