Sé cuanto pesa la melancolía porque me aplasta cuando me quedo en silencio con mis pensamientos, hace que no pueda levantarme y me quede ahí, hundiéndome cada minuto un poco más.

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Sé cuanto pesa la melancolía porque me aplasta cuando me quedo en silencio con mis pensamientos, hace que no pueda levantarme y me quede ahí, hundiéndome cada minuto un poco más.
I’m tired of being ignorated all the time and not having anyone. I think I’ve not been so bad person to deserve this such cruelty. So alone with all my feelings, stories and things. I just don’t deserve this. Life is so unfair. We all have deffects, for sure I have many. But I don’t fucking deserve this. I don’t.
I'm so fucking done with today
I'm stuck between, wanting desperately to kill myself and being too afraid to actually do it, and that's the worse thing ever. You do everyday activities and keep picturing killing yourself, you fight back tears in the middle of the day, you stay up crying and just want to end it all. But when you have that knife in your hand, you can't do it. You know you have no future and you're nothing, but you're too much of a pussy to do it. So you lay back down and cry yourself to sleep. Again.
Can I just die now?