#illegallovetask

[ashervermont]

TASK [005] ; journal entries

this is essentially ashvia okay I really tried to stop the ashvia but all his important moments are ashvia and just BE WARNED

JUNE 2015

I guess everyone had a different idea of Paradise when they got here. Maybe they were looking for palm trees or a stable living or someone to go to bed with. I don’t know what that fucker was looking for, but I sincerely hope he doesn’t get it. 

I remember getting to this island with almost nothing, and almost dying from the heat. And when I start to settle in, finally find a, uh, special friend... this douche goes and spills his drink all over me. Like, yeah, thanks. Little dork carried on when I returned the favour, like he wasn’t expecting it. Huh. This island may still be a little fun, but I hope I don’t have to see this mess of a kid again. 

Tristan Leighton. That’s his name, it’s Tristan. It even sounds like a douchey name.

Bright side though, there’s this guy named Logan Bateman that seems like a real pain in the ass. I think this is a guy I can get along with. 

AUGUST 2015

Today... today was something else. Bear with me here, because this is a long story. It started three months ago. Three months of teasing, three months of banter. Three months of sending her racing down hallways. The first day I met Olivia Leighton I seemed to give off the wrong impression. She was the only one who didn’t put up with my bullshit though, and I’d made it my mission to annoy her every day since. I don’t... I never knew why. Well, not until today. 

It’s not a surprise that our building is shitty. Like, look at it, it’s the eyesore of Paradise. So when the elevator stopped while it was only the two of us in it, the last thing I thought about was filling silence with this girl I’d spent hours mocking. I focused on getting out. But when that didn’t work, and Olivia was losing her shit, we talked. We sat down and talked. It could have been minutes, it could have been hours. All I know is that my heart was beating and it had nothing to do with the adrenaline from the elevator situation.

It took me longer to realise than it should have that I had come to... want this girl. And not the way you’d want someone you’d seen in a club, or at a cafe. A more innate wanting. I wanted to get to know her. I wanted to be beside her. And most shockingly, I wanted to be with her. So when the doors of the elevators were pried open, I was stupid enough and brave enough to ask her to go out to dinner with me. Which was amazing, until I fucked it up. Again. She ran out when I (untruthfully) told her I had no intent of having feelings for people. Or something to that effect. I don’t know, what I said doesn’t matter. It’s the fact she left that matters. 

I’m not smart. I didn’t chase after her when I should have. And instead, I sat there like a fucking moron. I juggled the options in my mind, did I really want to risk developing... feelings for someone? Well, it seemed my subconscious answered that for me because before I knew it, I’d raced up multiple flights of stairs and stood breathlessly in her doorway. She was shocked, I was shocked. And looking at her, she was just... she was so beautiful. She saw something in the world I didn’t she saw me for who I was. She was just... everything. And so I kissed her with all the heart I have, and I couldn’t stop smiling when she did the same.

And I knew from here on that this wasn’t about ‘just a girl’. She had become my girl. My Olivia.

SEPTEMBER 2015

Never have I royally fucked up as much as I have today. Never. Effectively in the process of a couple of hours I’d fucking ruined everything in my life. Every little thing. 

Liv and I had been dating, yes, had, for a while. It was still a secret, because neither of us quite knew how to tell her brother. And who should barge into her apartment unannounced as we’re making out on her couch? Yep. So the fucker stares at me and I had no clue what to do. I’d never cared about someone as much as I did Liv, and I didn’t want  her to hurt anymore at the hand of her brother. So in essense, my move was the second most fucking stupid thing I’ve ever done. I wasn’t even thinking, I was falling out the window and climbing down the fire escape before I knew what was happening.

I don’t remember the little details, I don’t remember a lot. All I remember is standing on that fucking cliff as Tristan threw the first punch. So I fight back. Liv is there, screaming for us to stop. We don’t. And without exerting myself too much, without us even fighting that hard... there’s a crack. Tristan falls. It’s not long before the sirens are wailing and I have hand-cuffs slapped around my wrists. Tristan’s not okay, Liv fucking hates me. Even Logan won’t be able to find something to mock here. 

To make matters worse, I get bailed out of jail by my roommate Emelyn. Sweet girl, nice. All she’d ever done is be nice to me. All I can manage to do is scream at her as I rage over the fact she’s not Liv. So I go to the hospital, Tristan is in a bad way. My bloodied hands and empty chest are nothing compared to the harrowing stare of Liv as she sends me away. As I leave. I can’t stay in Paradise, not like this. Not anymore.

I write this while I sit on the dock, waiting for the boat. I’m going to sea, leaving everyone and everything behind for however long I need. And if I’m lucky enough, the sea will swallow me whole before any realises I’m gone. 

Not that anyone would anyway. 

OCTOBER 2015

There is more to the world than fish guts and hooks. It’s taken me too long to realise that. 

I returned to Paradise after disappearing. No one knew where I’d gone, and I’d bet no one would have cared either. But that doesn’t matter. I came back anyway because there were three words on my lips that I couldn’t keep trapped forever. I needed to say it. 

I needed to tell Liv I loved her. 

Of course it had to be fucking raining. But I wasn’t going to half ass this. So I grabbed a copy of Romeo and Juliet, her favourite, and I started reciting out her window hopelessly until she opened. By the time she did, I was drenched. But I didn’t care. She was there, she was looking down at me and all I could feel was my love for her that I’d been drowning in for the past weeks. 

She dragged me in her window. I got to touch her, feel her warmth around my freezing hand. I held her body close to mine as I told her the truth that had struggled on my lips for far too long. And with a kiss, she reciprocated her feelings. And so that night we fell onto her bed, and we finally consummated the love we felt for each other. My world is still broken, fractured, but.... it’s perfect. Her laying beside me in bed, I just know... it’s perfect. 

DECEMBER 2015

I’m as in love with Liv as I was when I first knew. A love so potent apparently that we’d, well... we didn’t really plan this pregnancy, considering she’s only 18, we’ve been dating less than a year. But things are falling together and... I’m going to have a family. So Logan and I are working on repairing this defunct apartment to make our home. With everything Logan’s had to deal with, we’ve grown closer too. And I don’t care if I have to quit my job as a life guard, I don’t care if my world is small and the fact that my family is now, essentially, the Leightons. That would have bothered me before, but not anymore. 

Things make sense. I wake up and I’m smiling because I’ve got Liv, I’ve got a home, and I’ve got a future. And that’s all I can comprehend caring about now. 

FEBRUARY 2016 *******(tw)*********

I want to burn this fucking suit. The suit I had to buy instead of saving for baby formula and food. The suit I put on this morning as my body wracked with tears. The suit I wore as I said goodbye to the love of my life. 

It’s been a week since Liv died, and my son was born. Today we all gathered in the cemetery. The weight of the world was on my shoulders as I helped carried her down....

It’s never easy losing someone you love. But I never thought I’d lose Liv like this. I never thought I’d lose Liv. I couldn’t even bring myself to drink myself to sleep because I’d been so heavily gripped to Jax. I haven’t slept. I haven’t felt anything resembling myself since it happened. I’m so fucking lost. I have to raise a kid on my fucking own, I don’t know how to do that. I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to be without her. 

Don’t get me started on the fact that I can’t bring myself to look into the eyes of any of the Leightons, especially Tristan. I’m not even talking to Logan because the fucking asshole decided to attack my suicidal friend that I had to save. All the other people in my life are unimportant, but these are the ones I needed most... and I couldn’t bring myself to talk to any of them. 

I want her back. Fuck, I just want Liv back. Or at the very least... my chance to say goodbye. 

MARCH 2016

Looking back on my life, from here to now, this is not how I thought it would go. I never 

My home has become ours now. Today Jax was officially released into the hospital and into my arms. And I cried. I’d spent every day in the nursery of the hospital, no matter how much it hurt to see other happy couples doting over their children and seeing familiar hallways and doors where floods of bad memories arose. No, it’s all about Jax now. It’s all about Jax. 

My world suddenly feels worth something when he’s in my arms. His bright shining eyes and tiny little fingers wrapped around mine, it’s enough to make me think that yeah, life is pretty shit. But this isn’t. He’s my world now, and I’m going to protect him and do anything I can for him. 

I love my son, and I’m going to make a life for the two of us now. 

[dracoxthexdragon-blog]

FROM PEN TO PAPER. 

Despite his rather peppy demeanor, panic attacks came quite often for Draco. He supposed anxiety ran in the family. He remembered the nights his Mum would struggle for breath after his Father left. He remembered the times when in her younger years before she gained a woman’s body and a fierce attitude, his sister’s body wouldn’t stop trembling after the girl’s in her form would spit foul words at her. But most of all, he remembered the freaked out voices that got fuzzy rather quick when the lads from school would corner him and hit him until tears and snot streamed down his face and no breath would come at all for minutes as he shook. It never stopped them for long, though. After a while it became a game to see how quickly they could get him to do it. It was hard to forget the days that seemed to drag on for centuries. The ones that when he got home, he had no strength to do schoolwork let alone even think. Only the fear of failing and disappointing him Mum kept him from falling behind.

He’d always known he was different. 

When most people his age were off trying to get into each other’s pants, he’d been more concerned about which book he was going to read next or which song he’d learn next on the guitar. Only once had a girl tried to kiss him and of course, panic had set in then as well and he’d pushed her away and ran. For weeks he’d been taunted, gotten called names offensive to those who preferred men. The truth of the matter was, he wasn’t sure what he preferred. He appreciated the beauty and gentleness a lady could hold, yet the fierceness that came with her when she realized she wasn’t merely a lady, but a woman warrior not to be trifled with. But, he also loved the strength and power of men, and the soft sides that came with even the most rugged of lads. All in all, he just appreciated everyone. Anything beyond that had never come to his mind.

Until now.

Having to admit he didn’t know what, for lack of better words, turned him on. Well.... It was embarrassing. Was he a freak? His hands had began shaking right after the moment of admittance and he’d put all electronics aside in favor of walking the streets, the night air not calming him despite how much he wanted it to.

He’d wandered for hours before he spied a small shop that was still open despite it being the wee hours of the night. Luckily, he’d brought his wallet and while browsing the shop’s selection of drinks, his eye had been caught by a simple postcard. It wasn’t anything fancy. Just a simple beach scene with cursive script that read I’ll meet you here with an arrow pointing to a spot. On a whim, he’d bought it and a pen along with his drink and walked for a bit longer until he’d found a bench that was under a streetlight. Sitting down, he propped the postcard on his knee and uncapped the pen, keeping the top of it between his teeth as he brought the tip down to the postcard’s back. It didn’t take but a few moments for him to fill out the address information for his Mum, but he paused when his hand shifted to the area designated for his message. After a few shaky breaths, he finally willed himself to write.

Dear Mum, 

I don’t know who I am anymore. I’m not sure if this was a good idea.

I love you,

Draco

He’d promised to write her with the truth about how he felt when he’d arrived and well, there it was. Standing, he walked until he found the nearest postbox and slipped it in. No weight was off his shoulders. There was no magical moment of clarity from the action. The sun began to rise and a small sigh escaped him. Another day was starting. His uncertainties did not halt days, they never would. All he could do was put one foot in front of the other and try to remember to breathe. In doing that, maybe one day he’d get the answer to the biggest question always lingering in his mind.

Who am I?

[singlikeathena-blog]

FROM PEN TO PAPER

She wasn’t quite sure why she’d grabbed the postcard. It was simple enough, really. Just a beach setting with messy script that said I’ll meet you here with an arrow drawn pointing to no special spot. Yet... 

Athena wiped tears from her eyes, turning her gaze up to the beach she was sure the very scene in the postcard had come from. She and Tamerin had spent their honeymoon on a beach. It hadn’t been anything fancy, of course. They’d been two wide-eyed, dumb kids barely out of high school. They’d waited until her eighteenth birthday, then eloped to escape any sort of government involvement in their relationship. They’d been young and unknowing of the temptations and heartache that came with trying to make it as an adult.

She’d grown up much quicker than he had. For the first three years, things had one rather smoothly. They both worked a lot to make ends meet in their tiny apartment, but every night when they’d come home from work they’d curled up together and assured each other that was where they wanted to be, sealing each promise with a kiss.

It wasn’t long after her twenty-third birthday and their five year anniversary that she began to notice things changing. She was always on him about spending money better, and he was always on her about wasting time writing music when she could be focusing on their relationship. Instead of begging her to play for hours on end and sing to him softly in the wee hours of the night, he was hiding her guitar strings and telling her to be quiet so he could sleep. The soft kisses and promises that went along with them began to vanish, and she began to realize that she was sharing the bed with a stranger. That was, when he came home and shared a bed with her at all. 

The young woman had done her best to act oblivious at first. After all, who wanted to admit that the person they’d vowed to spend the rest of their life with was cheating? She’d denied it to keep her sanity... Until she’d walked into their bedroom after work to find him naked with another woman in their bed. Naturally, she’d snapped. She’d screamed, cried, asked him why she wasn’t enough anymore and he couldn’t give her a good answer. Later that night, he’d packed and gone to stay with his mother.

She’d been too revolted by what had transpired in the bedroom to enter it for a day or so. Showing up to work wasn’t worth the energy. All she could do was sit there on the couch, vodka in her hand as she stared at the pictures from their honeymoon while wondering what went wrong? She’d done everything, and yet there she was. An empty shell. It wasn’t until she’d gotten up and caught a glimpse of her guitar case, pushed behind the curtains during one of Tamerin’s more annoyed moods, and she knew what needed to be done. 

Her clothes were packed, divorce papers were fast-tracked and signed on her part, and her wedding ring was hocked. The money from that and her savings was used on a one-way ticket to a place called Paradise, and a week later here she was. Hopefully, she’d never see Tamerin again.

Tearing the postcard in half, Athena stood up and walked over to the ocean’s edge, determination set heavy in her eyes. She wouldn’t meet Tamerin anywhere, ever again. For the first time in years, there was love and respect blossoming for herself, and she had a song in her heart again. No man or woman would take that from her. Nobody would ever break her heart again. Only she had the power to do that, and she wouldn’t accept anything but the best. After everything, it was what she deserved.

With those thoughts rushing through her head, a bubbly laugh erupted from her lips and the first real smile she’d had in months came to her lips.

Yeah, everything would be alright. 

[illegallove-rp]

FROM PEN TO PAPER

Everyone on this island has a story to tell, and you are no exception. We’re all configured with the ghosts that haunt us, the fears that follow us, the memories that enlighten us and the dreams that inspire us. Each and everyone person is different, which what makes this so important - it’s time to grab out your notebooks, and start writing. It’s time we get to know each other a little better. 

The PROMPT task will be a narrative that is inspired by the picture prompt below. Members are free to make their piece in any format they like (as a letter, a one-shot, written as first person or third person - from someone else’s perspective entirely, whatever you choose! It’s completely up to you!) You may even choose to incorporate other characters into your task (with member permission, of course). However, we ask that pieces be no shorter than 300 words, but there will be no maximum. The written pieces should be posted before February 7, and this task is compulsory for all characters to complete. And also, be sure to post with the tags #illegallovetask and #illegalloveprompt001

&. Visual Writing Prompt ; Use the image below to inspire you, and base your piece from. Consider the quote, the mood/tone of the picture, the location. This image is free to your interpretation, and we encourage you to be as abstract with this image as possible! 

PLEASE LIKE THIS POST ONCE YOU’VE READ THROUGH THIS TASK.

[adamalright-blog]

 PROFILE PICTURE:

NAME: 

The name’s Jacobson, Adam Jacobson *insert sunglasses emoji*

AGE: 

I’m 20 :/ (I’m practically dead, I’m so old)

LOCATION: 

I don’t think it has a name (yet), but it’s this place in my mind that I tend to just live in like 99.9% of the time. It’s a place where dragons live together with people in harmony, and the landscape is just indescribably gorgeous. Also, there’s usually Bon Jovi playing in the background, I’ve noticed. But, yeah, if you ever catch me daydreaming - which I usually am oops - I’m usually just hiding out in this corner of my mind. It’s where my photography inspiration lives! Also, where my deepest and darkest secrets are ooo. It’s sort of like my safe haven :).

SEXUAL PREFERENCE:

I’m a boy who just so happens to like other boys. What can I say? I like the hair, the eyes, and the cuddles that go along with them :). They’re just a very cute species. *rainbow emoji* *boys holding hands emoji*.

STAR SIGN:

Scorpio! I think that’s technically supposed to mean I have like an edge to me or something, but I’m the softest, least edgy, person you’ll ever meet.

LIKES:

Jeez Louise, I feel like this is such a deep question, BUT LIKE IT REALLY ISN’T. Sigh. Okay, I love photography, it’s my way of looking at the world and sort of making it my own. I also really like dragons, comic books, and all things mythical/fairy tale-like. Yeah, I’m nerdy, I know, I also really like the color blue because of oceans, the sky, and eyes. I also really love the color green, it’s my favorite color to work with photography-wise, and it’s just a really soothing color to me. I also really like classic rock, sleeping, food, and Holiday’s. And I know this is the like section and not the love section, but I love my friends. I think that was important to include.

DISLIKES:

I dislike hatred, violence, and in general, people who think it’s alright to hurt other people. I hate labels, stereotypes, and just anything that holds people back from being themselves. I also dislike mushrooms, I don’t understand what their purpose is, they suck. Oh, and Aquaman, like he’s just a disappointment to the superhero community tbh.

RELATIONSHIP HISTORY:

I’ve been in one long term relationship, but that’s it. And even then, it wasn’t very serious. 

FINISH THE SENTENCE - Your perfect partner is someone who….:

I think my perfect partner is someone who would - at the end of the day - be both my best friend and my other half. I just want to be with that person that both makes my heart stop when I look at them, but also makes me laugh until my stomach hurts. I want to be with somebody who knows me enough to know I’m dorky and lame, but still love me anyways. I want to be with the person that I can talk to for hours about everything - all of the little things and the big things. I want to be with somebody who I can just be with, not even have to say anything at all, and just hold them. I want to love somebody who is imperfectly perfect, who can take my breath away, and change the way I see both myself and the world. This all sort of sounds really specific, but it really isn’t. I think these things just follow after you meet that person that you’re destined to be with. I’m not picky really, I just want to be in love with somebody who makes me a better me.

TURN ONS:

I love blue eyes, boys with cute smiles, people who know more than one language (omg), and guys who are good with kids (<3). Is it weird that I think guys who can talk about their feelings are hot? Idk, but it’s cute. I think people who are just selfless, sweet, and overall kind people are just so hot in general tbh. I really appreciate people who are passionate about things they do, whether it be arts, sports, or something else entirely. Bonus: guys with jobs are also pretty *fire emoji*.

TURN OFFS:

Mean people, not sneezing in your sleeve, or eating with your mouth open. That’s basically it lol.

ANY OTHER IMPORTANT INFORMATION?:

I’m not really looking for people right now (I sort of have my heart set on someone) so sorry if you get up to here and still think I’m a good option (which would be surprising). You can never have enough friends though! If you want to be buddies you should totally hmu! (: