yknow, I expected this game to be sad, but I didn't expect it to be sad in this way. John is.... depressed. I was expecting this righteous anger. Rage. I wasn't expecting... this. I mean, there's a joke in the fandom that John was dumbass to go up to Bill Williamson's fort alone and then immediately get shot but we find out he genuinely believed he was going to die well before he got there. John has no idea if Abigail and Jack are actually alive or if they're pulling his leg to get him to do what they want. Everyone expects John to die doing this, John included. Hell, Bonnie straight up asks him if he's suicidal and he says yes. I feel like Bonnie saving him gave him a little blip of hope of maybe maybe maybe he can actually do this. He hasn't been hunted down and shot yet, maybe he can take the time to get help in doing this and maybe he actually will be able to see his family again. I don't know. I just wasn't expecting to load up the game and see John be a traumatized shell of already accepted defeat. I love Bonnie. I really think she's helped him get that first step up into hoping again.