#immoirails

[daedaluscried]

*points to a fascinating and/or cute platonic relationships*

I'll have like a hundred of those.

[corporalsnark]

SEBASTIAN. ASK MEME.

blog url: guns-n-shit.tumblr.com

posts they reblog: an uncomfortable number of tiger gifs sandwiched between porn gifs.  he would also reblog gun care posts and add his two cents to the end. stuff about alcohol.  He would have one side blog dedicated to all things glittery, ugly christmas sweaters, and general adorable things.And a second dedicated to photographs of him and Rain re-enacting films (obvs this is only in that verse but it's important).

first person they followed: In our RP-verse it would be Rainary obvs.In a more general verse it would probably be Sophie and he alternatively hits on her, bitches about his life at her, and trades murder-notes with her.

what kind of theme: he would have the default theme.  still. like a dorkwaffle.

2am text posts: SEBASTIAN MORAN IS A COMPLICATED GUY, OK? 

him getting really upset about Frodo and Sam

nipples

his nipple

robots with dicks 

drunken ravings about how nobody EVER bought him a goddamn gun for his birthday.

poetry

lil' bit of furry porn ngl

three lies and a truth about his misadventures

vague blogging about the Moriarty brothers ("not even 'jr' or anything he just gave them all the same fucking name")

love letters to Rainary ("no romo") 

[corporalsnark]

and here we have some huge nerds. running for president on a campaign of nipple rights.  in london. 

[corporalsnark]

Possibly too late but for the ficlet thing: (703) I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me. (Seb and Rain) - Anti

This is shorter than I wanted it to be. :T 

He gets up and leaves in the middle of the job.  Fuck it.  

Shoots the asshole he’s been hired to kill from two feet away instead of the usual mile or so; shoots him right in his goddamn face.  Fuck it, right? 

Ends up having to steal a cab because nobody will stop for a shady looking guy with dark skin and blood on his shoes.  He could just take the tubes, but fuck that.  

He throws his shoes off a bridge on his way over, so when he gets to the coffee shop he’s in his socks, but he’s there and that’s probably what counts.  

“Damn phone died right after I got your text.”  He grumbles without looking at her, he’s too busy glaring at the assembled patrons.  

When he finally glances down she’s not looking at him either, just holding out her hand. 

 “Fine, fine.  But only because I left the fucking charger back at the flat.” 

He can tell she’s trying not to smile when the cold plastic of the phone hits the palm of her little green hand.  Sparks crackle and linger around the port that would usually accept the charger and now she’s definitely smiling, smirking really, the way she does after having a chance to show off. 

“So what’re we doing here?”  He asks.

“They’re doing a reading and analysis of The Wizard of Oz.”  She answers.

[corporalsnark]

The ship meme: The very platonic ship of Seb and Rain

Did you mean: my babies ?

shops for groceries -- Do I even have to answer this?  Theirs is a household that either has too much milk or too little and it is a painful trial every time the subject comes up.  Their fridge is mostly full of old Chinese takeout and beer.  Grocery shopping is an ordeal because it's full of mixed messages. Milk? Butter? Eggs?  No, fuck that we'll just order Chinese again.

kills the spiders -- Sometimes Moran goes on spider crusades where he kills any spider that crosses his path.  Other times he's such a lazy shit that a spider could crawl across his face and he'd just wiggle his nose to try to get rid of it.  So Rainary either drops the spiders out the window or magics them away.  

comes home drunk at 3am -- This question reeks of dear, sweet Sebby.  Sometimes McHaughtney brings him home.  Just shaking his head.  Other times Rainary is out with him and she has to carry his drunk ass home while he quotes Lord of the Rings at her.  

makes breakfast -- Moran.  While loudly singing Ke$ha and swiveling his hips in an attempt at dancing.  Usually in his underwear.  He likes making breakfast though.

remembers to feed the fish -- If they ever had fish Rain would have to handle them.  That's too much responsibility for Seb. 

decorates the apartment -- Moran likes to bring home dumb shit and hang it on the walls.  He's also had the same couch for like 12 years.  He picked it out of a dumpster.  Rainary sometimes rearranges the furniture when he gets blackout drunk.  Just to see what his reaction is the next day. 

initiates duets -- Rain.  "I can show you the world."  "Kid I swear to you I am not getting back on that fucking thing."  "Shining shimmering splendid."  "I said no, damnit." 

falls asleep first -- Probably Rain, but only because she sleeps at odd times.  

[allcatsgotopurrgatory-x]

do you feel a certain sense of synergy between yourself and me? a kind of macabre and somber wondertwin type of harmony

I was listening to "It Had to Be You" and it has some really great Immoirails lyrics so I wanted to make a shitty photoset.

So I made an extra shitty photoset.

[allcatsgotopurrgatory-x]

Capernoited -- for Seb and Rain

Capernoited - Slightly intoxicated or tipsy.

It was his second beer and he was already starting to get that grin. The one that, no matter how many times Rain had coached him through the dimensions, he could never recreate sober. The only way to describe it was an off-kilter Miss America smile after describing her life goal was to get world peace.

Two hours prior, Sebastian had returned to the flat, a cigarette still burning between his middle and ring finger on one hand and a bag of beer and chinese food in the other hand.

" We need to celebrate! " Fifteen minutes later, Rain watched as two ambulances and a squad of police cars drove past. Rain didn’t see need for the ambulances. Sebastian was an exceptional shot.

" Kid. Kid. Come here, " He called her over in between heaping mouthfuls of lo mein, " Come over here. I have something to give you. "

Of course, despite every whisper in her mind telling her not to move, she did so. That’s what best friends who refused to admit how much they meant to each other did. Rising from her corner, Rain walked over to the couch where he was sitting. Plopping down beside him, she merely lifted an eyebrow in, questioning.

Reaching into his coat, Sebastian was obviously trying to be sneaky about his surprise. Unfortunately, Rain had been the one to install the magic pocket on that coat and knew fully well what sort of stuff he kept inside of it.

Still, as the glitter rained down over her, she pretended to look surprised.

[corporalsnark]

Lalochezia (Seb and Rain)

Lalochezia - The use of abusive language to relieve stress or ease pain.

"Haven't had a damn job in almost a month now", he says one day, out of the blue and without paying much mind to whether or not she's listening. (He knows she is, she always is). She doesn't look up, but he doesn't need her to."It's like the fucking cocksuckers in this town suddenly stopped being duplicitous douchebags in need of a gun for hire."  His fingers twitch towards his shirt pocket, where he used to keep the cigarettes, but stop halfway.  

"Maybe they have."  There's no conviction behind her reply, it's just the counterpoint that she knows he's expecting.  She knows as well as he does that people are useless stinking things that can always be counted on to want to murder each other.

"Fuck them," he snarls, "fuck every single last one of them, I'm losing my goddamn mind because of them".  He gets up from where he was slouched across their worn out couch, his posture that of a pacing animal (a tiger, if she had to dub it with a cliche) and comes to stand behind her at the window."The hell are you looking at, kid?"  "Cars in the rain.  The cars and me.  I'm not, but also I am."  Her eyes are half shut.  "Y'know, I could kill at least four of the assholes across the way there from this window."  "Sure," she mumbles, eyes widening slightly as a red sports car whizzes by."But not for free.  And it's not like anyone worth working for wants to kill our shit neighbors."

"The storm is passing.""No it ain't, kid, it's supposed to rain all afternoon."