Summary: Campbell calls Y/N drunk so she can pick him up from his station’s night out at the bar.
Warnings: Drunk Campbell; Drunk Campbell is clingy, Reader is mentioned to be much shorter than Campbell who is roughly six feet tall (I am personally five foot two); Reader is implied to not be Scottish but it can be interpreted by being from a different part of Scotland (I am personally American)
Note: I'm not crazy about the Beyonce song, it doesn't really fit, but if you had any other suggestions of songs about intoxication and love...
(Post-Asylum; May be connected to “Sweet Jane” or read alone)
"They were utterly intoxicated by each other."
"Even drunk, I am caught off guard by the way I remain intoxicated by you."
"Be drunk with love, for love is all that exists."
1994 *Six months after the events of “Takin’ Over the Asylum”
It was two in the morning when the phone rang about six months after Campbell got the Scotland Radio job.
“Ahhhg.” She groaned, blindly and lazily feeling around for her phone, knocking some things over, and answered her phone, “Hello.”
“Heeeeeey! Baby!” Came Campbell’s voice, clearly drunk. “Oh, I love you so much. Also, I’m super drunk with Eddie and them from work. Did I tell you I helped Eddie get a job at the station!?”
“Yes, Cam. I did. I was there when you did it." Y/n said.
“Twice a week.” He laughed, “But I’m just so sloshed! I can’t drive and neither can Eddie. Francine’s picking him up. Can you pick me up!? Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaase…” He kept that high pitched tone up until she said yes which she was going to anyways.
“Okay, yes. I will, just stop whining in that tone.” She said, “Let me get ready to leave first.”
“Love you!” Campbell sang and then he started singing Goin’ Out of My Head before Y/N hung up.
She groaned and rolled out of the bed.
--
When she arrived at the station, everyone else was gone except Campbell who was singing, drunkenly, I Want Your Cray-Cray at a high-pitched singing voice dressed in one of his hoodies just as his girlfriend was.
“I want your cray-cray!”
"Hey, radio star." Y/N said, walking up to her intoxicated boyfriend.
"Baby! My love! My world! My universe!" He laughed, getting up and throwing his arms around her neck, with him being so much taller than her, he nearly knocked her over but she managed to get a firm footing before that happened.
"Why are you sitting out here? It's way too cold."
"It's too hot in there." He said and tried to take another swig of alcohol.
"No. No, Campbell." She said, wrestling the bottle from his boyfriend who was whining now like a baby. "Come on, let's get you home."
"You first. I'm loving the view." He flirted, looking her up and down shamelessly, as he brought his hands to her waist, running his fingertips gently on her skin, below the hoodie. "You know how much I love seeing you in my clothes, especially my hoodies."
"Campbell, you're drunk." She sighed.
"And I did exactly what you told me to. I called you."
"Yes, I did. And you did so well." She cooed, her hand cupping his cheek and he nuzzled into it, proud of himself. "now come on. Let's go home."
She pulled him towards her car and helped him into the passenger's seat before moving to the driver's seat.
Campbell dozed off on Y/N's shoulder during the ride before she woke him up.
"No..." He whined so she turned the car inside light on and he groaned, "Ahhhhhg."
"Come on, party animal. Let's get you ready for bed." She said.
Campbell tried to be on his best behavior while drunk but he felt anyone else would've just dropped him on the couch... but not Y/N, not his Y/N.
She sat him on the edge of the tub in the bathroom.
"How many drinks did you have?" She asked
"I don't know." He mumbled without opening his mouth.
She brought a breathalyzer to him and held the nozzle to his mouth, "Open." He opened his mouth. "Breathe." He breathed. The breathalyzer beeped and read... ".16... so you had like seven drinks?"
"Sounds 'bout right." He slurred, nodding.
"Campbell, that's too high." She scolded and he pouted like a little puppy. She placed her hand on his forehead, he leaned his head back, looking at her with an alcohol-glazed lovey look, and then she felt his cheek and once again he nuzzled into her hand. "You don't seem cold or clammy, your skin doesn't seem to be any paler than usual. You're breathing is quick. So, you don't have alcohol poisoning..." She took him by the hands and pulled him to his feet, "let's brush your teeth, your breath stinks."
"I think a kiss from you is enough. Because you're so sweet." He flirted, leaning in for a kiss.
She leaned away from the kiss, making him pout and give her his puppy-dog eyes. "And you're so cheesy." She brushed his teeth for him and then told him to stay still in the middle of the bathroom while she got him some pajamas, slightly worried he might topple over and hit his head on the sink or bathtub. She got him a Radio Scotland t-shirt as he usually slept in a tee and his boxers. She brought the t-shirt as he started to shed his hoodie and unbuckle his belt.
She blushed, "Uh, Camps, here." She muttered, handing him the t-shirt, avoiding looking at him but he didn't take it and she looked at him as he had planned and he pulled his shirt over his head and smirked, raising his eyebrows in a teasing manner.
"Campbell!" She said, sternly.
"Alright. I was just jokin'. I'll be out in a minute." He said with a drunken giggle in his Scottish accent and she left.
A minute later, he called, "Help."
She opened the bathroom door to find him just barely keeping himself from tripping due to his jeans at the floor now, pooled at his feet and him still being very drunk, and trying to put his head through a sleeve. "I'm stuck." She could hear the pout in his voice.
Y/N smiled, gently and she walked over to him, "stay still." She advised him.
"Never." He mumbled with a hint of a childish whine.
She eased him to stillness before fixing the t-shirt so his head went through the head hole and helped him navigate his arms through the sleeves.
"Aye, my hero." He smirked and she leaned up, gently kissing him and he never refused a kiss from her.
She was a goddess from Scottish or Celtic mythology in his eyes. She was the Baobhan Sith, the female vampire who seduced men with her beauty and he would gladly give her his blood if she asked. She was Mórrigan, the Irish-Celtic warrior-queen goddess. She was Cliodna, the Scottish-Celtic goddess of beauty, love, and passion. He worshipped her with his every being.
"Okay, superstar, time for bed." She giggled.
"Will you stay?" He asked, forgetting whose house this was.
"Well, this is my house. So..."
"I like to wake up, looking at you." He mused before flopping face-first on the bed.
Y/n rolled her eyes and pushed him on his side of the bed.
Y/N turned off the lights and climbed into bed. A few minutes went by before Campbell said, loudly, right in her ear, "WAIT!?" He startled her with the volume of his voice, making her jump and pull away from him, and he lowered it, "Sorry." She reached next to her and turned on the sidetable lamp. "What were you doing when I called you?"
"Sleeping..." She said, hesitantly.
His eyes turned back into puppy-dog eyes of sadness.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, love." He apologized, he cupped the back of Y/N's head. "I must've been pretty annoying all night."
"No, you weren't." She reassured him, puncturing each sentence with a kiss. A sure-fire way to keep his drunk self entertained--also a sure-fire way to keep his sober self enterained. "I'd get up in the middle of the night to come and get you as much as you need. I love you."
He smiled and kissed her before bringing her in so she could rest her head on his arm and he stretched the turn off the light and the two fell asleep to a morning of him whining about his hangover.
