#imthebentley

[imthebentley]

If you're driving home for Christmas here's some helpful hints to be safe:

- Watch out for ice

- Check your oil before you go

- If you see a black 1933 Bentley stay the hell out of it's way...

[puck-the-devil]

Dear Mr Puck,

It’s been a little while since we spoke, but I understand that you are a being with the ability to ‘grant wishes’.

I was wondering whether you might be able to grant one for me? It’s for something… uhh… important!

You can find me in my usual parking space.

Looking forward to hearing from you,

The Bentley, Car of Crowley

Hello, Bentley

I appreciate your politeness, but just 'Puck' is fine.

Sure, I'd be happy to grant a wish for you. I just have one request in return.

You wouldn't be willing to keep what you know about fairy-killing to yourself, now, would you?

Talk to you soon,

Puck

[imthebentley]

The Bentley’s Hit list

just incase you were wondering:

The Metatron - self explanatory

Shax - strongly implied, to my face, that I was outdated. What a bitch.

Demons - obviously not my one (or Eric), but ones in general that show up via flies, forced entry, or interrupting Freddie Mercury - I HATE IT

Michael Bay - he killed 532 cars for his stupid movie and I’ll never forgive him.

Elon Musk - this isn’t about Teslas, I know plenty of Teslas who are really nice (even if they sound stupid as they go by). He once hit his own truck with a hammer on purpose - and also he’s a bigot.

Jeremy Clarkson - self explanatory

Anish Kapoor - yeah that fine artist who copyrighted Vanta black. No, not because of that. Him and his trucks full of giant art are the car smashers of Camberwell AND NO ANISH I WON’T TAKE IT BACK FOR LEGAL REASONS!

Towtrucks - how dare you in general, (made me have the most humiliating day of my life).

Tories - self explanatory

[imthebentley]

HUMAN BENTLEY MASTERPOST

As some of you may know I recently turned into a human for a night.

It might have been a bit hard to follow what was happening though - so I've made you a masterpost so you can follow along what happened from the begginning! Be sure to check out the notes too to see all the offshoots from different people joining in! (Not to mention all the secret messages in the tags)

The Bentley finds a very interesting flyer

The Bentley makes peace with Puck

Beetle gets dragged into this

The Bentley makes a wish

Crowley 100% knows something is up straight away

The Reverse Omens Wraith offers a lift

The Human Bentley finds her friend Beetle

The Bookshop makes a request

They go to Maggies record shop

Aziraphale gets roped in

Damage control with Crowley

The Bookshop recieves a musical education

The final jobs before we can go

The ride in the Wraith!

The gang arrive at the venue

Gig of a life time! (Aziraphale art special!!)

The magic runs out at midnight! Let's all go home

MISC: Human Bentley design sheet

Thanks for reading and participating! Who knows, maybe I'll transform again one day. Into what - I have no idea. I'm a car of many surprises.

[imthebentley]

Prepping for when we FINALLY go to the Ritz again

[imthebentley]

The Bentley's Predictions for the next season (of our lives)

The writer's strike is over! Here's some ideas for Neil Gaiman and John Finnemore.

I get entered into a vintage car show and win a trophy.

Aziraphale returns after seeing me in the local newspaper winning a trophy, mainly because he misses me.

I turn a LITTLE BIT yellow (just a little!)

I take the wheel, to drive around on my own to save Crowley, (he’s gone awol).

We get in a high speed drag race around Soho with the Metatron, who drives a Citroen 2CV.

The Citroen and I fall in love (our love is forbidden).

I get to shoot a missile out of my exhaust pipe at a traffic camera like on Johnny English.

We do one of those jumps over Tower Bridge when it’s halfway open.

Obviously I win the race and the Metatron gets done for tax fraud or similar.

We go to a drive through to watch a Richard Curtis film (with the Citroen).

As a present for being the best car, I finally get one of those smelly trees I’ve always wanted.

There's a double wedding, and we, (the demon, the angel, the citroen and I), fly off into the sunset like at the end of Grease - tin cans clinking behind us.

EDIT: Please send these to Neil and John through the power of telepathy ALONE so that they think these were their ideas all along - and do not actually tag them

[imthebentley]

Roll call! Which of my girlies also blasts Queen and thinks about fresh tarmac to stave of their existential crisises!

[imthebentley]

YOU ARE A GOOD CAR. I REMEMBER REAPING YOU. IT IS GOOD THAT THE CHILD BROUGHT YOU BACK.

@rider-on-a-white-horse

...

Ah... it's you... ok... I do recognise you but I don't remember a lot else...

But actually, this clears up a question I had been thinking about. I do have some sort of soul then - enough to be taken somewhere. So that's good I think.

And thank you - I thought I might be a good car but it's always good to get an outside opinion.