Kidnapper: I have one of your friends. Dancing Banana: Which one? I have seven.
Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up.
Dancing Banana: Which one? I have seven.
Pear, distantly: HEY!!!
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Kidnapper: I have one of your friends. Dancing Banana: Which one? I have seven.
Kidnapper: The loud, annoying, rowdy one who never shuts up.
Dancing Banana: Which one? I have seven.
Pear, distantly: HEY!!!
Announcer: If I went missing for like a week, would you be alarmed?
Boardy: I think so..?
Announcer: That— That’s nice, I didn’t think you’d be alarmed. I thought you’d be—
Boardy: You’re my friend…
Announcer: I don’t like how you said that—
Boardy: You’re my friend!
Announcer: Why are you yelling at me, “you’re my friend??”
Boardy: YOU’RE MY FRIEND!
Announcer: OH GOD!
Boardy: I would be concerned if you disappeared!
Banana: Fine, I’ll admit it. I still can’t swim! I never took those lessons at the community pool.
Announcer: Banana, you promised!
Banana: They wanted to put me in the beginners class with the little kids. I can’t be swimming around with a bunch of five year olds! They can be so cruel when they sense weakness…
Apple: [ Grilling a slice of cheese ]
Pear:
Apple: I’m making a grilled cheese!
Pear: Where’s the bread?
Apple: You don’t call it a grilled bread with cheese sandwich, dumbass. It’s called grilled cheese for a reason.
Oldest Nephew, scrolling through his phone: Onion rings are just vegetable doughnuts.
Peel: Sure they are
Oldest Nephew: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.
Peel: ...okay
Oldest Nephew: Lasagna is just spaghetti flavoured cake
Peel: ...
Oldest Nephew: Lobsters are mermaids to scorpions
Peel, sobbing: Dude, please stop
Middle Nephew, fascinated: No no continue please
Lemon: You don’t need to worry about me, I just need to worry about me!
Lemon: And don’t mind the yelling!
Lemon: I yell when I’m NERVOUS!!!
Banana: A year ago, Middle Nephew got bit by a house spider and he was crying so I went to get some stuff to soothe and numb it, but before I could even walk out the door, I heard him quietly whisper, "I can’t handle the responsibility of being Spiderman."
[ Nephews get in trouble when they’re older ]
Banana: For the past few years, I have done the best I can to raise the three of you. Have I been perfect? No! Do I know anything about children? No! Should I have picked up a book about parenting? PROBABLY?!
Banana: …where was I going with this? I had a point.
Middle Nephew: Sorry…
Oldest Nephew: We love you, uncle bossman
Banana, yelling: WELL I LOVE YOU, TOO!