365 self-discovery journal prompts #1
I recently bought this book, so I'll start my first journal entry. The prompt is: What do you always think about but never talk about?
I have to say the answer is sex. I think the increased libido or hypersexuality is due to my bipolar disorder. I haven't discussed this with my doctor because it's so embarrassing.
I do, unfortunately, rely on porn sometimes to put me to sleep. Isn't that terrible? haha. But it works better than counting sheep for me. And it's Japanese porn which can be sometimes a bit disturbing. It's just more interesting than other porn.
I also think back to my previous partners. I had some good times and I had some bad experiences which were a bit riskier, again due to bipolar disorder. I didn't think anything of someone filming me until I was in my right mind. I think that person did share it around, coz some friends said they were sorry for how that person treated me. can't do anything about it now.
I think I'll never have sex again because I don't foresee any partner in future. That's a little sad because I would still like to have a sexual partner at least. There's still this increased libido that wants to be addressed.
Honestly, touch was never my own love language despite how good it makes me feel, so I know this is all driven by bipolar disorder. anyway, anyhoo, c'est la vie. I don't know what will happen tomorrow.
I'll put any other journal entries that are not bipolar-related on my other blog www.tumblr.com/anyhowly You are welcome to follow my self-discovery journey.