#insicurity

[cyberkitty1]

E!42 miles x thick/chubby black reader

warnings: not proof read, lowercase intended

Part 2

Sometimes you just feel out of place, I mean your family is so good looking! why did the genes have to skip you?

You and Miles have been together for so long ,and he knew of your struggles with good body image and in was always making sure to complement you and made you feel as if you were on cloud nine.

When you were at parties he would always get you another plate/ go up with you to get food and even fought off you fat shaming aunties for you. He was so sweet.

Dont get me wrong; you can stand up for yourself but when it came to how you looked tou always seemed to be at a loss of words.

You were invited to a family reunion and decided to take him with you he always made these go by fast. You and miles had gone shopping the day before and you got this top paired with some jeans and heels.

You don’t nt know what it is but you’re having a random boost of serotonin? you felt so happy like you were over the clouds.

Miles opens the car door for you and helping you in and closing it once you are situated. he jogs around to his side sitting down and starting the car.

“ you exited ma?” you turn to him and smile “ yea! i have been craving aunt mimi’s cooking” you say dreamily he laughs at you before starting the car and starting your journey to the party.

you arrive at the party looking at all your relatives for a second before joining them.

Everyone seems so happy, people dancing, people talking, kids running around playing, and mothers bringing the food out to the long table with an assortment or amazing food.

miles goes to grab you and him and drink and takes a seat next to you. you were having a conversation before one if your least favorite aunts walks up to you.

“ long time no see hun” she says motioning for you to hug her, but you hesitate. “ hey auntie how have you been?” “ ive been the same since the last time you saw me! and who’s this young man?” she says motioning to miles.

he stands “ im Miles Morales, its nice to meet you ma’am” he says smiling at her. “ you got a good one honey” she says before whispering to miles “ make sure she don’t eat half the table” she says laughing.

miles looks at her sideways before looking at you and seeing your sunken sad face. you felt the pit in your stomach grow larger. she walks away continuing prepping the food.

“ you ok? its not too late to go home.” he says sincerely. “ its ok, i still wanna see my family” you say giving him a bright smile, but it only eases his anxiety a tad bit.

before you could say anything else the cousin that you hated the most, the one that made you leave functions early, the one that always found a way to put you down walked in.

maybe you should have left even he offered.

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.

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[whoiskonsty]

insecure.

[mynotebooks-areoverflowing--blog]

Indifference

When I shaved my legs for the first time

I was twelve,

I had pictured a smooth perfection.

But when I finished

I realized they were covered on stubbs.

I thought that I would suddenly love myself.

But my legs still wobbled when I walked

and I was still too bony

and my knees still knobbed.

So I sat on the floor and wept

with my razor next to me.

Why did things that were

supposed to make a difference

have no impact?

[giugiette]

Sometimes I be feeling confident about myself. Yk feeling cute and stuff then I remember my nose has a bump

[soul-submission]

Be Happy With Your Looks! | Mufti Menk & Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan

[archisoulspace]

I’m sinking in a sea of insecurity and drowning in uncertainty.

proud-and-pan

[worksbymel]

Why must words be said? Can we just know what needs to be said without truly hearing it or speaking it? How do we convey words we are afraid to speak aloud? Why? Can? How? Questions.

MP 10/21/2015

[theveryoldtestament]

Loving Who and What You Are

I do not understand why so many people these days are unhappy with themselves. I do not mean with what they have done or where they are going in life. I am talking about what they are and who they are. There has been a rather large spike with people trying to change themselves, physically, to better conform to their inner-identity. I find a lot of people not wanting to be what they are, based on the belief that it is not what they should be. This is mostly in relevance to social roles.

I find this troubling. Not because people have certain desires and that they act out those desires to better fit themselves, but how people are becoming less and less happy with what they are. Their thinking that changing something about yourself - identifying as something else - will solve your identity issues. Assuming that going by a different name will make you happier. The idea of surgery as a "cure". This is a dangerous mindset and it will not solve your self-perception issues.

Nobody is fully happy with their life.There is always things we want to change about ourselves or others. Do not, though, feel as if you need to change what you are to better fit how you feel. Be happy with yourself both within and without. You can wish to act a certain way, but that does not mean you have to not be what you are to do it. Drop the perception of social roles. Be who you are. Love what you are. Embrace everything about yourself and do not think that altering yourself will solve anything.

Finding yourself, figuring out who you are, is a process developed internally. Sometimes things can seem like the right path in the moment, and may feel right, but it does not mean you will find yourself by doing it. In the end, we cannot force ourselves to change. We can try to mask it but it will never truly change. Do not mask yourself to better express what you feel. Take what you have and let it be part of your expression. You are perfect the way you are. You are just fine. Do not think that covering it up will make you feel complete.