Magic and Madness - Chapter Eleven
Happy is He Who Has the Pure Truth in Him. He Will Regret No Sacrifice That Keeps it.
𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 -> Stephen seeks to bring the truth to light.
𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓 -> 3357.
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 -> (E) mind-control and SA references, accusations, questioned motivations, short smut.
𝐀/𝐍 -> A Companion Piece to Multitudes, exploring the relationship of Tony Stark and Stephen Strange. This chapter best corresponds to Multitudes Chapter Thirty- I recommend starting here if you're reading both <3. Masterlist can be found here! I'm aware that we're skimming some of the Nat details - but this project is, after all, largely about Stephen and Stark! ❤️
Check it out below or on AO3 here! Dividers come from yours truly.
<- Previous Chapter (10/46) Next Chapter (12/46) ->
I woke to him humming softly as he bustled around, the odd lyric falling from his lips.
“... Forget your lust for the rich man’s gold... All you need is in your soul...”
“... If the sun refused to shine, I would still be loving you...”
“Has he lost his mind? Can he see or is he blind? Can he walk at all, or if he moves, will he fall?”
Iron Man, Stark? Seriously? I grinned fondly, eyes still closed as I listened to him.
“I’m so ugly, that’s okay, ’cause so are you.”
“Rude, honeybee. Rude.”
He snorted softly, slurping with a contented sigh. “Knew you were awake. Thought the Iron Man would break you.”
“How’s the coffee?” I murmured, nuzzling closer to my not-Tony pillow with a contented sigh. He paused briefly, and I smirked. “You’re nothing if not predictable, honeybee.”
“It’s good. I’d enjoy it more if you were here to suck my cock while I drank it.”
I scoffed softly, eyes peeling open. “Yeah... Predictable.”
Though I do intend to file that away for later use.
“I’ve gotta head off, or I’d really like to continue this,” he sighed, and I smiled fondly as I sat up, rubbing a hand over my face.
“Yeah. Busy day here too, remember? I... I’ll let you know if... How it goes.”
“I... W-will I see you later?” he asked hesitantly, and I grinned.
“Would you like to?” I purred smoothly, and I could practically feel his blush over the line.
“Yes. If that’s okay?”
“More than okay, honeybee. I’ll see you this afternoon.”
“I’ll see you this afternoon.” His smile was audible, lighting up my own, and a bell chimed in the background, making him sigh. “I’ve gotta go. Breakfast. I love you eternally, baby boy.”
“I love you too, my heart. Always.”
“You’ve got to be kidding.”
I sighed, pushing a hand through my hair. “Steve-”
“No,” he snapped, pushing himself back from the table with narrowed eyes. “No, Stephen. Not a chance.”
“Maybe we should let him-”
“Has the world gone mad?” Cap growled, lurching to his feet, shaking his head. “How can either of you think this is a good idea? We have bigger priorities right now. Natasha is still missing, and you want to waste time on man - the waste of air - that got them assaulted?”
“It wasn’t his fault,” I ground out, fingers balling into fists.
Steve looked to Wanda desperately, shrugging. “Help me. Make them see sense. Please.”
The witch turned her gaze to me, considerate and thoughtful. “... Head or heart?”
“It’s impossible to separate the two,” I replied quietly, shrugging. “But I was prepared to go there and... Never see him again,” I finished pointedly, and she nodded, her gaze flicking to Bruce – the only person present who wasn’t already aware of the precise nature of my relationship with the engineer. “I didn’t intend to give him a second of my time. And maybe I’m believing what I want to believe – Tony is my friend and teammate, just like he is for all of you. But I don’t think that’s what's happening here. I’m typically quite astute – as well the three of you are aware – and I firmly believe that Stark is telling the truth.” Wanda watched me shrewdly, before nodding slowly. “I say we let him try.”
Steve huffed, shaking his head, but Bruce held up a hand to stop him before he restated his tirade. “Cap, let’s just... What’s the worst that can happen?”
The war hero met his gaze steadily – but his hands shook, betraying his emotion. “Why don’t you ask Natasha?”
Wanda stood with a growl, fingers sparking. “Don’t you dare. You do not have the right to speak about things you know nothing about.”
“Enough,” I snapped, standing. “Steven, you have always respected me, both as a teammate, and as a man, and I like to think I have never steered you wrong.”
Well, apart from all the times I’ve failed Natasha.
“I need you to extend that same courtesy to me again now. I need you to put the faith in me that you have before, and rest assured that, should it be necessary, I can handle myself. And if he can’t be of assistance, then that’s just the way it is,” I added, shrugging weakly.
I really, truly hope he is. We need Tony to come home. I need Tony to come home.
He watched me carefully, eyes narrowed. “... Fine. But if he... I... You may regret it,” he concluded weakly, shaking his head. “He’s slowly becoming more lucid, but... Some of things he says are still – well, they’re not his own.”
I nodded once, offering him a weak grin. “Understood, Cap.”
The soldier watched me wearily as I entered the room, Vision at my back. He was largely left unchained now, apparently – save for his worst moments of violence – and permitted his own quarters without constant supervision.
The synthezoid nodded, smiling reassuringly as he closed the door behind me. He’d been instructed to stand guard – the closest thing to a neutral party we had, and unlikely to intervene for emotional purposes.
“I don’t know you... Do I?”
I shook my head, indicating toward the table. “May I sit?” He waved a hand as he eyed me suspiciously, and I sank into a seat with a grateful nod. “Thank you. No, you were correct – we’ve not met before. You don’t know me, Sergeant Barnes. My name is Doctor Stephen Strange.”
“It’s Bucky,” he corrected, then paused, assessing me briefly. “... Doctor?”
“I’m not here in a professional capacity,” I noted quickly, and the slowly tensing line of his jaw relaxed infinitesimally. “I just... I want to ask you about the people who sent you here.”
He sighed with resignation. “I am asset number 32557038 - designation; The Winter Soldier. My last registered Handler was Anthony Stark.” His voice was emotionless as he recited the information, speaking to the profound familiarity of the script.
I nodded slowly, thoughtful. “And what were the last orders you received from Stark? Do you recall?”
“To interact with Natalia Romanova, also known as Natasha Romanoff. No specific parameters were given.”
“So why did you... Do the things you did?” I pressed gently. This part was routine – this was how far Steve had gotten. On cue, his gaze flickered worriedly, chewing on his lip.
“I... I was ordered,” he stammered, fingers clenching in the sofa.
“Okay – okay, let’s try a different track,” I murmured comfortingly, hands raised. “Stark doesn’t remember issuing those orders. Do you have any idea why that may be?”
His gaze found mine once more, notably calmer. “Yes.”
“Can you tell me?”
“... I...” He hesitated, glancing about himself again. “I shouldn’t. I understand the difference, now – but I... I shouldn’t.”
I inched forward, hands shaking. We’re so close. I can taste it. “Please, Bucky. It’s so, so important that we know this.’
He licked his lips nervously, rubbing the heel of his hand against his leg. “I... He had orders.”
“How?” I urged, leaning closer. “Was he controlled? Like you?”
“Not like me,” he whispered, shaking his head frantically. “Not like me.” I nodded, but his arm wrapped around himself anxiously. “Th-there isn’t another like me.”
“I know, but-”
“I was deployed to intercept the water supply,” he spat, jaw clenched as he trembled. “The drug is harmless without activation and orders. He was activated via phone call once you were confirmed to have returned to the Sanctum. His orders were given after, through that, and a series of later calls. He was ordered to register himself to me as my Handler to sow discord and ease my access.”
I sat back in shock, blinking. “It wasn’t his fault,” I breathed, scrubbing a hand over my face. “It wasn’t his fault. Oh, God.”
I’d believed him – of course I did – but somewhere in the back or my mind there lived the unshakable, pressing concern that he wasn’t telling me the truth. A profound horror that he was, knowingly or unwittingly, spinning me falsehoods in desperate attempt to return to my side.
“Doctor Strange, you- you need to leave,” Bucky grunted, fingers tangling in his hair. “You need to go.”
I watched him cautiously, torn.
I’ve caused this with my questioning. Am I not under obligation to attempt to help? Primum non nocere, after all. First, do no harm.
“... No.” I stood to move anxiously closer, eyes narrowed hesitantly. “Your name is James Buchannan Barnes, but you go by ‘Bucky’.”
“Stop. Leave,” he whined desperately, curling into himself.
“You were born in Brooklyn in 1917. You were a sergeant in the U.S. Army. In 1943, you survived a fall that should have killed you. You-”
His head snapped up, fury flaring in his pale eyes. “You know nothing, Strange.”
I halted at the anger, hands shaking minutely. “Actually, I’m often regarded to be quite intelligent. Though, as the infamous genius said – ‘the more I learn, the more I realize how much I don't know’.”
He growled as he moved to his feet. We were around the same height, but my lithe body paled in comparison to the Herculean demonstration of muscles before me. “Smart mouth. That’ll get you in trouble.”
“Oh, it does. With startling frequency,” I snorted, backing up minutely as he moved closer. “... You’re the Soldier, aren’t you?”
“I am of no concern to you,” he snarled, the muscles in his arm tensing with barely-contained rage. “You are not my handler, nor are you my target.”
“And who is your target? Because Natasha is long gone, Barnes. Which means you’re failing in your mission,” I quipped, one eyebrow raised.
“My mission is over, and I performed flawlessly,” he snapped back. “The target is broken, and returned to the Red Room, where she belongs.”
I laughed, shaking my head softly. “No. The Red Room is over, Soldier. It fell several weeks ago.”
His gaze hardened, but I saw a flicker of panic – and hope – in the icy depths. “You lie.”
“What reason could I possibly have to lie to you?” I offered, spreading my hands innocently. “I’m uninvested in this particular outcome, Bucky.”
He stumbled backwards at the name, shaking his head fiercely, eyes cutting to me. “It... It’s really gone?” he whispered hesitantly, and I nodded.
“Not a trace,’ I reassured him soothingly, and he sank back down to the sofa.
“I... I’m sorry, I...”
I shook my head firmly, muscles unclenching at last. “It’s quite alright. My own fault. I’ll leave you in peace; thank you for your help, Bucky. You have no idea how appreciated it is.”
The same three were gathered in the meeting room, staring at the frozen screen blankly. “... I... I have no idea what to say,” Steve muttered eventually, wincing. “I told him he was a liar and an asshole, and to never try to pass off his own regrets as someone else’s actions again... He’s my teammate. My friend. I should have... I should have believed him.”
His shoulders heaved breathlessly, fists curling, and I arched a stunned eyebrow as he lashed out, chunks of plaster raining from the wall when his fist collided, a low tremor rocking the foundations from the force. “... Steve-"
“His father was a hero to me, did you know that? I thought he was one of the greatest men who ever lived,” he muttered, resting his forehead against his fingertips, straight back still turned from us. “He made me what I am, and I idolised him. I was wrong there, too. I’ve let Tony down, time and again.”
I winced, jaw flexing at his words. I know that road, Rogers. It isn’t one you want to walk. “No,” I interrupted softly, stepping closer, my footsteps hushed and hesitant. “Tony is... An enigma, certainly. And somewhat of a loose cannon. But you have stood by him through countless calls for his head – both literal and metaphorical. He won’t begrudge you this – just as he doesn’t begrudge you the adoration you once afforded his father. You had no reason to presume he was telling the truth; his behaviour is historically less than stellar when he’s been drinking, even if it's never... Even if he’s never done anything so bad.”
“So... What do we now?” Bruce interrupted softly. “Do we show everyone this video? It’s pretty clear it wasn’t Tony’s fault, it seems. Though I still think his sobriety is the right thing to encourage,” he added, glancing around to an assortment of nods.
“Certainly. He’s made some... Excellent personal growth while he’s been there, it seems.” I blushed infinitesimally as I spoke, and Wanda smirked knowingly. “But... I’m seeing him later. Let’s leave it for now. I’ll check how he wants to proceed.”
Steven nodded, stepping forward to extend his hand to me. “Thank you, Stephen.”
I offered him a soft smile, inclining my head graciously as I wrapped his fingers in mine.
Tony stared blankly at the screen, only blinking vacantly.
“... Honeybee? Are you okay?” I pressed softly, moving to kneel before him, eyes wide and concerned as I took his hand in mine.
He cleared his throat softly, gaze flicking to me. “I, uh...”
Smiling weakly, I pressed my lips to his knuckles. “It’s your proof, sweetheart. It wasn’t your fault.”
His face crumpled at my words, and he sucked in a rattling breath as he sobbed, the tears flowing immediately from his beautiful, innocent eyes. “I-I... I knew it wasn’t... That I couldn’t stop. That I wanted to stop, but I couldn’t. But I-I... I didn’t know if I believed it, not deep down. Because what if I really am just a shitty person? I-I’ve done bad things, Stephen. Unforgiveable things. But this... This was beyond anything. And I wondered if I maybe I... I just am that much of a monster but I was too much of a goddamn coward to accept it to myself. If the fucking humiliation of admitting I wasn’t under my own control was just some unconscious punishment for my own horrific acts.” His gaze found mine, wide and frantic. “And now I... Now I have to somehow deal with the knowledge that I can be controlled like that. What if next time they don’t bother with the Soldier and just use me instead? What if I’m the one who does those things to her? To you? How am I supp-supposed to just go on with the kn-knowledge that I can be used as a w-weapon? That... What if they use the suit? They- I- I could- They could cause so much hurt, and d-death, and damage, and I-I can’t-”
I dragged him from the edge of the bed as his breathing hitched feverishly, wrapping my arms tight around him. “Hey, hey... Sh, sweetheart. It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s over, okay? The Red Room is gone. They can’t hurt you, or Bucky, or Natasha. Not ever again, do you hear me?”
“If they can do it, s-someone else could-”
“No, sweet boy. And do you know why?” He shook his head jerkily against my chest, and I pressed my lips to his hair. “Because I will rip their throat out with my fucking teeth if they try,” I replied flatly, growling. “I actively avoid causing harm, but for you? For you, I would let the entire world burn with a goddamn smile. Nobody will hurt you as long as I’m around – you got that? You. Are. Mine. Anyone who wants to try will have me to answer to, honeybee.”
His breathing stuttered once more, trembles settling deep into his bones as he curled closer, my hands protective on his body. “I understand why she does it,” he whispered against my shirt, and I drew back with a frown.
“What do you mean?”
“I... Nothing. I- It doesn’t matter,” he murmured, fingers caressing my chest gently. “So... What happens now?”
I hesitated, still concerned, until the hand smoothing over my collarbone distracted me. “I, uh... That’s up to you. We can show everyone the footage. Show them you weren’t responsible.”
His teeth ground audibly before he nodded, swallowing dryly. “That’s the only way I’ll be able to come back, isn’t it?”
“I think so, yeah.”
“Any other time, I think I’d rather be hated and feared than pitied. But that’s where you are, so... I guess I have to choice,” he muttered bitterly, fingers curling. “Fine. But I... I have to tell Natasha myself, when we find them. The least they deserve is to hear it from me.”
My jaw clenched at the idea of spending an indeterminate amount of time listening to them hate him before they learned the truth, but I nodded slowly. “It’s your story to tell, honeybee. You do it however you wish.”
He hummed thoughtfully, lips finding my throat. “I really appreciate you doing this for me, baby boy... So loving and considerate...”
I couldn’t help but purr quietly, leaning into the contact. “O-oh?”
“Mhm,” he agreed against my skin before sliding off my lap and offering me his hand. The second he pulled me to my feet, I was pushed back onto the bed, shivering with excitement before his mouth found mine. “Why don't you let me show me just how grateful I am?”
I let out an embarrassing whine as he cupped me through my slacks, head falling back. “I, um- I guess that’s... I can accept that.”
“How about I do what I would have done last night, had I been there?” he breathed, fingers finding my belt, and I whimpered around clenched teeth as I nodded.
“Please,” I groaned, pushing into the contact as he reached inside my briefs.
There’s something I... I should be thinking about.
“I must say, I’m sad to see you’re wearing underwear today, baby boy,” he purred, lips finding my throat once more as he pulled me free, already half-hard and twitching. I shivered with delight, hips twitching as he stroked me lightly.
“If I promise to go without tomorrow, will you skip the gentle part?” I muttered desperately, huffing under his ghosted touch. He groaned against my flesh, fingers wrapping harder around me.
“Fuck, that’s hot,” he hissed, teeth skimming my skin. “The idea of you wriggling around without any underwear on? I may just have to tease you – gonna be harder to hide this without the extra layer, isn’t it?” he added, hand moving faster along my length as I nodded eagerly.
“Hm- y-yes. May have to e-excuse myself to r-resolve the s-situation.”
He made a soft sound of arousal, biting my jaw roughly. “Pics, or it didn’t happen.”
I whimpered quietly, back arching as he worked me eagerly. “F-fuck, how are you this g-good, I can’t-”
His head dropped from my throat as I felt my muscles begin to tighten, taking my length desperately and exquisitely in his mouth, and I groaned as I surrendered to the swirling of his tongue, fingers wrapping in his hair to push him further onto me. A yelp of pleasure fell unabashed from my bitten lips as his nails dragged across my abdomen, and he let out a quiet whine as I found my release, swallowing eagerly.
When he lay beside me a moment later, I glanced at him pointedly. “I-I don’t... I don’t recall that being how last night ended...”
His hand smoothed over my tunic as he chuckled, licking his lips. “I’m becoming quite partial to the outfit, Sparkles. Didn’t want to get anything on it.” My fingers reached for him instinctively, seeking the arousal digging into my hip, but he twitched himself away with a smirk.
“No, baby boy. This was about showing you my gratitude with a reward.”
“But you are a reward,” I countered, pouting, and he laughed, kissing my forehead.
“It’s okay, my love. I’d just like to lay with you awhile, if that’s okay? I’ve missed just... This,” he finished softly, his cheek lightly meeting my chest as my arms encircled him with a nod.
Something isn’t right. Something... Something isn’t okay.
I just don't know what.