I got so carried away I’m sorry ╱ @thursdy
there is brimstone echoing through tranquility, bright swaths of stained glass painting a disconcerting picture throughout the stone & wood trappings — much the same as any other worn boots had traversed in his years ( children tucked away under the pastors watch, creeping into the crypts below, holy ground as safe as it became dangerous ). snippets of the darkness twisting in the corners, reaching for something. salvation ? depravity ? a source of familiarity. there is grief here ( is there not always ? lost souls seeking redemption at the hands of ignorant idols, claiming lives with little care ), faded into the walls in a tapestry of lost crusades. how foolish to believe such a place would hold any answers; foolhardy belief in the divine caring for the mortal. ( again, there is blood on his hands, under his nails up his arms painted down the aisles its own harrowing beauty before reality snaps back into focus ).
they should not have saved him. the echo hurts.
it was always funny how such choices came back to prove haunting; how looking in a mirror & finding old eyes brought about more anxieties then climbing out of his own, desecrated grave ( staring into it with the single minded focus of one who should not be. what's dead should stay dead a mantra long lost ). previous trips backwards — forwards — round & round the fractured structure of here & now & then. visions of the past matched visions of the future as punishment demanding his head as a solution ( it was always the winchesters stirring up trouble, how many more horrors did they cause then they ended ? ). mental laughter ! was it ever really about the unique “purity” of his soul or was that a lie, too. there was nothing righteous left here, complimenting a structure that reeked of “divine intervention." now the question was just who. it's not like this is a first.
but was the hunters own time a better option ? the banging crescendo of bloodlust pounding in his skull a battle march hard to ignore ( but here there was no blade in hand to provide sirens song, a solid hold in brittle bone to grab onto ). ghost of a touch along the holy to match disillusions bitter eyeroll. he should never have come here.
turning to head right back out that door ( to find answers, surely, from someone. there was no place without even the semblance of a formal head ). heaven, hell, all that in between — if it hadn’t mattered then why would it matter now ? dean had told them to leave him alone ( bloody blade but inches away but a warning. a promise ? he didn't know anymore. bodies scattered a picture perfect image of cruelty ). perhaps this was a better option, to stay & serve out whatever time bored immortality crafted for another chapter. somewhere to live out the last years of clear cut sanity before the curse wore out what little of him was left.
a flash of green catching on a sight teasing at memory, frown long hardened on his face; shock of black atop a splash of tan. ( I'm the one that will have to watch you murder the world ). the burning anger surging in the hunters gut as much a warning as any — fingers curled into a fist as his side ( bloody memory of a loose hand on his wrist, fury in bruised knuckles & blood stained faces; fight back ) to match the low thrum of action the mark sang. teetering on the edge of compulsion. you should have killed me when you had the chance.
it was a few steps forward, one step back.
bone weary at the sight of the angel perched in a pew within a house of god — a sight not seen in years ( no, not since before the leviathan, before purgatory & abaddon & death's quiet warning. always before ). is this where she had driven him ? that bird on his shoulder, tempting the angel back to the host. the voices of the chaotic fallen hovering in life's peripherals ? back to following the ill understood commands of an absent father ( the discordant clash of a symphony in pieces ); dean couldn't even find himself surprised. it has been but days ago green was painted in black, mortality a fickle notion to a knight ( the smooth grip of a handle grasped with a low buzzing thrill in the hunt ). humans felt to much — demons felt to little.
at war with himself, in the end.
demands bubbling up past the anger & the hurt, betrayal ( in a way, just let him go ). partial understanding in the limitations of stolen grace doing nothing to pause the echo of his steps — send me back home ( was it stolen grace or but another squabble amongst bitter siblings in a race to regain their wings ? ), send us back home ( what did it matter ). whisper in the quiet sway of fabric & the low burn of candles — why did you even bring me here ? — voice in his head snorting at the sheer thought of that angel even having the will to get back up; tattered feathers on shredded wings ( someone always to blame. was it not his own fault such a creature now stood chained & discarded from its home ). dull noise climbing the walls coming to a standstill, arms crossed with heavy gaze resting on the other ( don't follow me, next time I won't miss ).
❝ so, care to explain ? ❞