#itistheanne

[itstheanne]

December Break

I'm slowly trying to get myself into writing again. I feel like my life is happening in a blur. And I know I've been saying it over and over again but this is me.... trying.

The year is about to end and I only got a few days to set things straight, make everything right in my perspective.

At the start of the year, I thought I was really doing great. Slowly, people and friends (close dear friends) are learning about my wonderful relationship with Joy (I get more kilig as the days pass by tbh) and this for me was a great great start! We traveled to quite a lot of places we haven't been to. We've exhausted ourselves into showing how we love ourselves because honestly, we feel that we deserve it. Of course, I wouldn't say that this was our year. It always was until something unfortunate happens (I wouldn't dwell into that for now). But I think it's lovely how we've held on and are still holding on to each other.

It was truly difficult for me, this year is. I never had to pretend so much about my identity because I thought that it's not really that of a big deal. You see, I'm a girl who happens to be in love with a girl and I'm happy being like this. I still breathe the same, work the same... I still am me, right? I never had to deal with people accepting my preference because it isn't really their business right?

I get it how tatay finds it difficult to accept me enjoying my job at first when he saw me work my ass off while studying my course. I know, I know, he misses me a lot and believe me, I'm doing everything I can to see them more often than not. We've been having more conversations about family and life and my comfort more often now and if you've lived with me from childhood, that's a big difference.

These days though, I always think about my mom. My nanay loves me. I bet she does. I believe it got difficult for her to love me when I told her about me being like this and my relationship with my girlfriend. It still makes me cry a month after everytime I remember everything that she told me after going public about it.

My gay friends, I'm talking to all of you now. Have you ever felt abandoned or that you've disappointed people after being out about being gay? To be honest, it's so hard to love a person who is very vocal about being hurt just because you're gay. There were a lot of questions that came into my mind after everything that happened a month ago. One thing that I always keep in my mind and that I know for sure is how much my mother loves me.

My prayers every night include intentions of healing for those who are sick, repose of souls, the well-being of my family and friends, but mostly about me - to answer hurt with love, to answer doubts with love, to answer hate with more love. My life has always been about loving. And I've loved myself more because of how He continues to shower me with His love through my daily graces and angels. I owe a lot to Him. So may this last month of the year glorify Him through the works that I do, through my heartaches and little victories over tiredness everyday. Through breaking cycles of hatred and starting a circle of love, passion and gratefulness.

[itstheanne]

Day 1 of a new workout routine!

I’m doing a 20 Days Slim Back and Arm Program and a 15 Days Inner Thigh Program. I was supposed to add a cardio workout (either HIIT, aerobics or a random dance workout) everyday but since Emi’s arm program has a lot of cardio, I’ve decided to just do so every 1st and 6th day of the week. 7th day is my recovery day! :D 

This time, I promise to work out to eat! 

[itstheanne]

Getting stronger everyday!

So this is part 2 of my last diary from this.

I began another month of workout. This time, I really stuck with a routine and among all the videos that I like watching, I chose to stick to Emi Wong’s 30 Min Full Body Fat Burn HIIT. I stuck with her as I realized that most of her workouts are beginner friendly and are not too hard to follow. I added the following routines as well which I would do alternatively as I aimed to provide one hour of my day to working out. 

Arm Workouts: 15 min Tabata + 10 min Back & Bra Bulge Burn

Ab Workouts: 10 Variations of Plank Workouts + 10 min Lower Abs & Intense Belly Fat Burn

I finished that one month and boy, it was a long hard road. What kept me going was when I started seeing ab lines on my fat tummy! Haha! My belly is still fat as is but I was purely satisfied with my results as I started feeling stronger for each day I’d do the workout. 

(lol. look at that tummy and arms)

(now this was when I was about to end this month long routine) 

It was especially hard for me to keep up with this new routine that I’ve established during the last week as I had a GERD attack! I always felt bloated and I’d fart all the time. But thank God, I pushed through it!

Now, I am starting a new program - still using Emi Wong’s videos. Let’s see how long my body can hold up. It is actually amazing how this body can still be trained to be stronger! 

Anyway, I am sharing so when I look back on this blog, I’d know that there was something that I was able to do and accomplish.    

[itstheanne]

A Step to Love Myself More

Hey everyone, itistheanne! <3 

It’s been a long time coming from when I last felt comfortable posting here. This was supposed to be my safe space where I’m supposed to pour my heart out and post about anything and everything that I want to. 

Sadly over the years, I had been very preoccupied with my job at a theme park. (I keep on saying this, right?) It was a very favorable job for me so I poured my all into that job. Then came COVID-19. And all our lives had been put into a pause. 

It was really hard to adjust to a life where you spend all day long inside your house and I swear on some days then, I was about to lose my sanity. Luckily, I have friends who pulled me out of the hole by making sure I get to talk to them everyday. 

Social media had somehow put a pressure on me as well (my close friends would know that I deleted my FB app at my phone but then I have Instagram still) and I kept seeing all these people starting a quarantine routine. Some would spend their days learning how to cook but then I have my girlfriend who does that for me. Some would even have their OOTD’s or MOD’s at home! Now, I am too lazy for that. Some would spend their days towards having a glow up. Now, that got me intrigued. Why? I had wanted to keep a fit body but for so long, food is always within my reach and it was pretty easy for me to dwell on working as a reason for me not to exercise. But now, what is there to stop me?

Of course, when you work out, you must have a certain goal and at first, it was for me to look better, to loosen my arm fat, and not to feel heavy all the time. I got too conscious after I heard a workmate make a remark that I am getting big (imagine that with my small height), especially my arms. My arms had been a big dilemma to me all throughout these years. 

Then began my fitness journey. I did 10 minutes worth of workouts at first. I watched workouts by Chloe Ting, blogilates, and Emi Wong. Then later, I found out about The Fitness Marshall’s dance workouts. After a month, I can exercise for a whole 30 minutes! But I was not seeing the results that I like. 

So I opened up to a friend, Kim, someone who’d push me to workout. And she told me that maybe it was because I kept on doing different exercises. And I really did as I thought, just moving my body would get me to become thinner. But nah-ah. 

After some time, I also had to change my perspective as I was getting tired and I felt that I was just dragging myself to exercise. What is really the reason why I wanted to workout? In the end, I realized that half of the things I wanna do, I end up not doing because I don’t believe that I can. So--- with my friend’s guidance, I began another month of workout. This time, I am going to stick to a routine. 

Workout time, amigas! 

[itstheanne]

Finally after 3 trips to Ilocos, I was able to try this experience!!! 💪 Thank you so much to our parentals @rica.sshi and @jek_manalo for pushing me and @joyreyesduran (kahit di naman sya nag slide sa sand hahaha). ☺ #braveyan #annestagram #itistheanne (at Laoag Sand Dunes Experience) https://www.instagram.com/p/BmkomHTgBiq/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=824ne8bhf590

[itstheanne]

#annestagram #itistheanne #BacktoIlocos (at Sta. Monica Church) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bme9Leqgm-G/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=qftfrxrdpmpv

[itstheanne]

Thinking of my @joyreyesduran 😄😆😘 #annestagram #itistheanne

[itstheanne]

#itistheanne #annestagram (at Dreamland Arts & Crafts Cafe - Tagaytay)