Dec 29, 2018
My lil gay heart 🥰
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My lil gay heart 🥰
🙌🏽 #IvanCoyote
Post Five: TED Talk by Ivan Coyote
In this TED Talk, Ivan starts off by saying there needs to be single stall gender neutral bathrooms. Ivan makes the case that it should not be about fitting into male or female bathrooms because some folks are not male or female. Even though they know they can often pass as male most of the time for bathroom purposes it still does not solve the issue of feeling uncomfortable in changing rooms. They follow that by saying, “And I shouldn't have to use the men's room because I'm not a man. I'm a trans person.” Providing the insight that even if you identify as trans that doesn’t mean you have to fit yourself into a binary especially not for social purposes like bathrooms or locker rooms.
Another important part of this video is the section about three minutes in when Ivan talks about the new legislation people are attempting to pass saying that people will have to use the bathrooms that match the gender assigned at birth. This creates a whole new list of problems. For example, Ivan is seen as too masculine presenting to be in a female bathroom so the men’s is usually the best option but if this legislation passes then that won’t be an option either.
An amazing point brought up is how we are going to attempt to police who goes into what bathroom. We usually assume if people are in the ‘right’ bathroom based on how many gender markers we can identify. Stereotypes such as hair length, clothing, or facial hair unfortunately are the first assumption that we know a person’s identity. How will we know what genitals people have walking in? We can’t have everybody stop and be searched or some ridiculous method similar to that. For that reason, Ivan makes the claim that this is all about putting fear in people. This will increase the transphobia people experience and create more dangerous spaces.
Much like other sources, Ivan appeals to the idea that these single stalled structures as bathrooms which can also double as changing rooms offer a safe space to not only trans folks, but people with disabilities, people with body image issues, or people that don’t fit neatly into the awful boxes that exist in public spaces. Creating single stalled restrooms that also have benches or things like a locker room would have would also be cost efficient in that both things would be in one place so there would be no need for an excuse about needing to pay more to create multiple rooms.
Source:
https://www.ted.com/talks/ivan_coyote_why_we_need_gender_neutral_bathrooms?language=en#t-7076
I completely agree on a lot of what you’ve pointed out. The English language lacks a proper pronoun for people like Ivan and Coyote, who just don’t identify as male or female. I suppose that’s why the queer community has been trying to come up with alternatives to “they” such as Ze, Xe, Ey, Hir etc. On the other hand, I also think that other languages are pretty bad at having gender neutral pronouns. I know Arabic has labelled everyday objects as male and female, and there’s a similar concept in French where you have to use the correct verbs depending on whether the object is a he or a she. I appreciate the class example that you gave because I noticed the same struggles everyone had trying to keep their sentences gender neutral. I did not have as much trouble reminding myself to refer to my friend as “they”, but perhaps its because I’ve had months of practice. Although everyone is class respected Ivan and Rae, they repeatedly referred to them as “she” or “he” by accident. Your conclusion sums up the post nicely. Being gender neutral doesn’t make you a gender failure. What makes you a gender failure is being part of the problem and miss gendering others.
Joanna in response to Are We All Gender Failures?
Do you know about #GenderFailure? The amazing live performance by raespoon and ivancoyote? There’s also a fantastic book they compiled with more material than could fit into the live show.
November 10, 2010
"Thanks for sitting in random public spaces for countless hours, questioning the motives of mankind, patiently awaiting my opportunity to participate in a disability dialogue, circling random blocks of Brooklyn, taking a ride from strangers, indulging in the wonders of queer creativity and eating chicken wings into the night ! That is what best friends are surely for."
My Facebook messages to you
"i'm not sure why i can tell that you are not straight, but i can, maybe it's the way you look at me...."
time takes the edge off of the unbearable, turns wounds into scars, agony becomes just an ache. what used to hurt all the time only bothers you when you move it just so. tragedy has a short shell life this is how the world apologizes for being such a bitch sometimes. eventually, crisis becomes just a circumstance, a situation that just must be dealt with. so that's what happened. time turned the gaping wound where she had been into just an empty ache. somewhere between her mouth and her chest and eventually minutes and then hours and then even days would pass between bouts of overwhelming lonely. and this was a good thing.