#jadzeanna

[boophisburnhamae]

Girlfriends

[tposhi]

"you remembered" "of course i did. how could i forget anything about you?" for Jadzeanna? 💞

Spoilers for ds9 s2e4 “invasive procedures” and tng s4e23 “the host”

Deanna sat by the biobed and held Jadzia’s hand throughout the surgery. It was all she could do, really. Joran was taking everything from the woman Deanna loved. She could sense so much from Jadzia, and in that moment she wished she couldn’t, because the only thing worse than feeling your own heart break, is feeling your beloved’s heart break.

Deanna’s last experience with Trill was with Odan. Odan’s host had died, and Odan had used Will Riker as a temporary host to conduct diplomatic negotiations until a new Trill host could be sourced.

When Will and Odan finally parted ways, Will hadn’t remembered anything of the negotiations. Odan’s new host had mentioned that joined Trill tended to suppress the host’s memory processes in favor of the symbiont’s, because only the symbiont would have use carrying those new memories forward.

When Deanna had discussed this with Beverly, she assumed she would never need to worry about it happening to her. Now she knew all of Jadzia Dax’s memories would be gone, cruelly stolen by Joran along with Dax themself. And she would see Jadzia, the shy, dedicated woman who she loved (though she also loved Dax; it’s impossible to really separate the two under normal circumstances).

When Jadzia’s eyes fluttered open and she was Just Jadzia now, Deanna could feel her pain, the crippling empty loneliness that comes with losing a part of yourself. Deanna recognized it, from the time her own empathic abilities were suppressed.

And then Jadzia’s gaze drifted to her, and something wondrous happened.

“Deanna. Imzadi.” Joy. Comfort. Still hurting, but not so alone.

“You remembered?” Deanna’s voice came out barely above a whisper, but it really had seemed like too much to ask for.

“Of course I did.” Jadzia squeezed Deanna’s hand. “How could I forget anything about you?”

Jadzia was the one whose situation was critical, but it was Deanna who found herself crying. Jadzia Idaris wasn’t the same, and probably wouldn’t survive, but still loved her.

“I don’t want to lose you.”

Jadzia pulled Deanna’s hand to her face, pressed a kiss against the pulse point on the inside of their wrist.

“Imzadi. I feel so empty. Promise you won’t leave me too.”

Deanna felt her heart clench with each word. “I promise.”

She leaned forward to kiss Jadzia. The kiss felt like lavender and eucalyptus in the rain. It tasted of tears, and sorrow, and longing for years together that they might never have, now. It was a slow, calm kiss, and it eased both of their hearts.

Jadzia was still cripplingly empty. Deanna was still terrified. But maybe, just maybe, their love would be enough to carry them through.

[tposhi]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Some super sweet Jadzia/Deanna fluff I wrote for @lesbianziyal.

It’s their anniversary. Finding the right present is hard.

[tposhi]

for the "send me a ship and i'll tell you" post, jadzia and deanna!!

I wish I knew how to insert a readmore on mobile because this is l o n g

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa? I don’t think either of them really do. Partly because the doors are all automatic, partly because neither of them are really airheaded. Though I’m sure sometimes when she’s distracted and stressed Jadzia takes the wrong path and Deanna wonders where she’s going but follows her anyway because she’s curious where her girlfriend goes by default. One time a couple of months into their relationship, she ends up at Deanna’s quarters and blinks at the door, then at Deanna who’s just smirking as she types in the door code, steps inside, and pulls Jadzia down for a kiss.

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them? Deanna. During particularly boring briefings she half pays attention, half doodles Jadzia’s name in her notebook with little hearts around it. Last name sharing doesn’t quite work in either of their cultures, but she still, secretly, writes Deanna Dax or Jadzia Troi or JDxDT in little hearts. She keeps the data chip with those embarrassing doodles in her pocket, and freaks out at least once when it gets lost. When Jadzia finds it, she never stops teasing Deanna, but Deanna can tell that it’s coming from a place of playfulness and love with no actual malice.

Who starts the tickle fights? See, you’d think it would be Jadzia just because she’s so much more outwardly playful, but in private? It’s Deanna every time. Unfortunately, Jadzia is way less ticklish, so Deanna also loses every time. If you can call it losing.

Who starts the pillow fights? They both do.

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile? Deanna usually falls asleep first, and Jadzia admires the way her hair is an uncontrollable mess at night, the way her eyelashes refract starlight, the way she snuggles with a surprisingly tight grip even in sleep. Deanna also wakes up first, basks in Jadzia’s peaceful joy, the perfect equilibrium of hard lines and soft curves in the shapes of her face, and eventually wakes her up when she starts idly tracing constellations in the spots on her cheek with a finger.

Who mistakes salt for sugar? People do this??? Then again I guess people who aren’t me actually use salt and don’t pass out regularly. Like with the door thing, though, I don’t think either of them are that kind of ditzy.

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning? Jadzia. Deanna loves her, but the woman seems to have no sense of time.

Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines? Jadzia. They’re all, like, REALLY bad puns.

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order? Jadzia, who probably organizes the entire suite when she’s stressed. Then Deanna gets home and is like “babe, you messed up my organization of the bookshelf. They were sorted by theme, and within a theme by how strongly the author felt about argyle socks.”

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies? Deanna. Is that even a question? It’s chocolate. Plus, I bet Jadzia is more of a “make cinnamon twists out of spare apple pie dough” type. But Deanna usually insists they make brownies for dessert whenever they’re cooking from scratch, and Jadzia can’t bring herself to say no, especially when she sees how happy it makes Deanna.

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion? Jadzia. She does love fire. And Deanna loves classical romantic gestures, so it’s a win-win.

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen? Deanna. I don’t think I can see Jadzia being an artsy person, really. Jadzia probably is the one to write silly love poems, though.

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation? Just a magnet? Jadzia finds all sorts of weird art on every vacation. The walls and shelves of their quarters are covered in mementos of foreign locales. A lot of them were Curzon’s; he got out a lot more than either of them. Most of Deanna’s artwork and trinkets were gifts from her mom. She hides them away in a box, accordingly, not least because half of them are nudes.

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines? See, Deanna is a practicing psychologist, and yet I’m absolutely certain Jadzia is the one who’s like “horoscopes are BS and so are personality quizzes” and Deanna is the one who’s like “come on, they’re not about objective truth, they’re about ~discovering yourself~ and, in this case, each other.” In the same vein, Deanna definitely reads Jadzia’s horoscope and their compatibility chart. She mentions it to Jadzia once - “my Mars is square to your Venus!” And Jadzia laughs and says, “neither of us was born on Earth, and we aren’t on Earth now.” Deanna starts reading Bajoran astrology instead.

[tposhi]

prompt 1, with jadzia/deanna!

(fictional kiss prompts)

1. breaking the kiss to say something, staying so close that you’re murmuring into each other’s mouths

She tasted like heaven, today.

And it had been such a long day. Deanna loved her job, she really did, but she was exhausted, and she’d promised they would have dinner together before she knew Jadzia’s runabout would be five hours late. After one hour, Deanna couldn’t focus on anything but the window, hoping this would be the moment the wormhole opened.

Five hours, Jadzia had frantically tried to calm her racing hearts and keep Julian from trying to help repair the malfunctioning navigation array. Engineering extension courses be damned, he was the one who’d fucked it up and gotten them into this unfortunate pickle in the first place. Jadzia had rented a holosuite and was going to take Deanna to a romantic dinner on the third moon of Andoria. But now she was going to miss the reservation, that Deanna had looked forward to for so long.

And so when the airlock opened they were first to press against each other, lips seeking lips so frantically you wouldn’t believe they’d just parted that morning. Julian stepped slowly around them, eyes crinkled in amusement, then his footsteps echoed as he departed down the empty corridor.

“You missed our date,” Deanna muttered into Jadzia’s lips, then pressed another kiss to her. This one felt almost like a plea.

Jadzia felt her heart wrench. She’d known Deanna would be sad, but it was another to have her beautiful, sweet, endlessly caring girlfriend accost her in her arms, mid ‘welcome home’ kiss. “It was Julian’s fault,” she teasingly whispered. She didn’t follow her words up with another kiss, instead aiming to rest, lips still touching, hands still resting on Deanna’s waist.

“I’ll forgive you this time,” Deanna murmured, “but you’re going to make it up to me.” She stroked Jadzia’s cheek with her right hand, tweaked her nose as she pulled away.

Whatever “making it up to her” entailed, Jadzia knew she wouldn’t mind.

[boophisburnhamae]

Jadzia/Deanna? Is there a tag??

It's a pretty rare pair as far as I know, but there's some @jadzeanna on both tumblr and ao3!

[dialogic]

rubi: saying Kind And Helpful Beta Things to me over tumblr chat

me, repeatedly: [edwardian schoolchild voice] golly, thank you!