I want you to talk to me
Because I'm alone. I'm dying. I feel like you'd know what to say. I don't trust myself to be alone and you make me feel like things are going to be ok. I'm so fucking proud of you Feron. You have no idea how jealous of you I am. You're trying so hard to heal and I haven't been. Im so scared. I need you to hold me and let me cry.
I'm being so selfish, because these things that I can't ask you for aren't good for you. You need to grow and the way I am now won't let that happen. If I really loved you I'd prove it by getting better and that's the only thing keeping me here.
I want to say thank you because this is the trigger that set me on the path of healing. I'm so sad it had to be this way and I know you are too. This isn't the end but it is the hardest thing I've ever done...
I love you. I love you enough to ask someone for help. I love you enough to be good for you. I love you enough to prove it to you by letting you have yourself. I'll let you in every single time you're here, but I'm not gonna fight you. I'm not gonna make you feel bad or guilty for taking care of yourself.