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#jasoniad

Jun 9, 2023

Freddy vs. Jason (2003)

"Who cares about some fucking dream guy, OK? That psycho in the hockey mask was real."

"Dude, that goalie was pissed about something."

#freddy vs jason #freddy vs. jason #jasoniad #freddython #horror imagery tw #gore tw #2003 #slasher film #ronny yu #robert englund #ken kirzinger #monica keena #jason ritter #kelly rowland #katharine isabelle #christopher rodriguez marquette #brendan fletcher #tom butler #lochlyn munro #kyle labine #zack ward #paula shaw #jesse hutch #david kopp #considering the years this spent in development hell‚ and the high expectations attached to it‚ it could have been a lot worse #ok sure the cgi is ropey and kelly rowlands calls Freddy the f slur for no reason and sure the dialogue is frequently woeful and consists #mainly of awkward exposition delivered in monotone; but the actual plot is pretty smart‚ it's a clever way to bring these boys together #and the final fight is an absolute baller that goes all out on the nasty and the excess. undoubtedly a fairly silly film #(the weird dream caterpillar with a bong is probably a low point for slasher films in general but actually kind of endearing for its #shittiness) but a film like this was never destined to be a stone cold classic. enjoyed it for what it is: dumb as rocks ott fun

Jun 6, 2023

Jason X (2001)

"What the hell is going on?"

"Jason fuckin' Voorhees, that's what's going on!"

#jason x #jasoniad #horror imagery tw #slasher film #2001 #american cinema #james isaac #todd farmer #victor miller #kane hodder #lexa doig #jonathan potts #lisa ryder #chuck campbell #melyssa ade #peter mensah #melody johnson #derwin jordan #amanda brugel #dylan bierk #philip williams #harry manfredini #absolutely insane film in every conceivable way. presumably some suits discussed how to keep the franchise alive‚ someone mentioned that #sci fi was having a renaissance in cinemas‚ and everyone decided to send Big Boy to space and call it a day in the studio #just so many bizarre decisions. the plot‚ the dialogue‚ the costuming and sets. oh did you hear? the earth is uninhabitable in the future #but we don't have time to talk about that rn bc Jason Fucking Voorhees hitched a ride on this space ship. we do have time for multiple sex #scenes tho. also this film cast David goddamn Cronenberg and then threw him away in the first five minutes? the balls of them!#films that actively make you stupider as you watch them‚ but also this is weirdly a really fun time and i wouldn't change a thing #not even the worst line of dialogue in the series to date ('this sucks in multiple ways!')#every franchise deserves a tenth movie set in space. just 6 more Paddingtons to go.

Jun 5, 2023

Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

"We're going to Camp Crystal Lake."

"Oh yeah? Planning on smoking a little dope, having a little premarital sex and getting slaughtered?"

#Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday #jasoniad #jason goes to hell #horror imagery tw #1993 #american cinema #slasher film #adam marcus #dean lorey #jay huguely #kane hodder #john d. lemay #kari keegan #steven williams #steven culp #erin gray #rusty schwimmer #richard gant #leslie jordan #billy green bush #kipp marcus #allison smith #julie michaels #benefited a lot from going into this blind; that pre credits sequence is absolutely insane and kind of glorious if you aren't expecting it #the rest of the film is a hot mess unfortunately; absolutely fails to build tension or suspense (found myself wistfully thinking about #the second film‚ which is paced and edited so perfectly‚ while here stufd just happens...). weird choices throughout (including some #broad attempts at humour which don't all land‚ tho the presence of the much missed Leslie Jordan was a delightful surprise)#after a rough start John D. LeMay turns out to be a pretty competent‚ pretty cool hero. the Duke character is absurd but #somehow spellbinding in it. also apparently Jason's... essence? soul? whatever it is‚ it's in his heart and he can body hop now which is..#something. eh. i missed Hodder when he was offscreen tbh‚ he's quickly become the definitive Jason for me

Jan 10, 2023

Jason Lives: Friday the 13th Part VI (Friday the 13th VI: Jason Lives, 1986)

"Darren, we'd better turn around."

"Why?"

"Because I've seen enough horror movies to know any weirdo wearing a mask is never friendly."

#jason lives #friday the 13th part vi: jason lives #jasoniad #horror imagery tw #slasher film #tom mcloughlin #thom mathews #jennifer cooke #david kagen #kerry noonan #renée jones #tom fridley #c. j. graham #darcy demoss #vincent guastaferro #tony goldwyn #nancy mcloughlin #ron palillo #courtney vickery #michael swan #harry manfredini #a film of two halves‚ with a consistent goofiness and willingness to spend time on silly little asides sitting uneasily with a more #serious and high stakes desperate battle in the back end. i enjoy the latter a lot more than the former‚ and the vibe for some of the #goofier splatstick moments was entirely not my thing; once it all gets a bit grim and heavy tho i was more onboard. torn to shreds by #censors on first release‚ the result is a somewhat clumsily edited slasher that still manages to convey some real horror if only through #implication. ron palillo‚ immortal star of Hellgate‚ turns up for all of five minutes but i loved it and he shows what a good performer can #do with even a minor role (seriously‚ he's gone by the opening credits‚ but he makes a real impact). this is the end of the Tommy Jarvis #saga but there's still Jasons left in that deep well of slasherdom... yet to meet his waterloo #also shout out to Paula‚ not just the best camp counsellor in this film but the best the series has had period. like the only person to #take the job seriously. i was rooting for her‚ she was the real mvp (rip)

Jan 6, 2023

Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning, 1985)

"Jason Voorhees? You're out of your fucking mind, you've been out in the sun too long! Jason Voorhees is dead! His body was cremated, he's nothing but a handful of ash."

"You know that for sure, mayor? Were you there? Did you see him cremated?"

#friday the 13th part v: a new beginning #jasoniad #slasher film #horror imagery tw #1985 #danny steinmann #martin kitrosser #david cohen #john shepherd #shavar ross #juliette cummins #todd bryant #tiffany helm #melanie kinnaman #corey parker #miguel a. núñez jr.#sonny shields #dick wieand #rebecca wood #ric mancini #absolutely the dumbest film in the series so far‚ and contender for one of the dumbest slashers to come out of the 80s marathon of big #screen splatterers. starts with an unlikeable vibe full of ott eccentric characters and needlessly goofy asides and silly performances #and ends with one of the most inane and inexplicable twists in horror cinema (so much so that a scene explaining it had to be shot and #inserted in post after test audiences understandably reacted with bafflement). I'd be even harder on this film if it wasn't also doing #one thing really well: it sets up one twist so cleverly and with such capable misdirection that i was fully suckered when it DOESN'T happen #and instead the stupider twist does. it sounds weird but it's a case of leading on a smug and self confident horror viewer (guilty) and #it's honestly a brilliant bit of 'i bet you have this figured out huh.. Wrong!'. otherwise tho yeah this is not a great film. also it's #very noticeably sleazier and nastier than its predecessors‚ with much more nudity and sex and general exploitation.#director Steinmann had a background in pornography and it shows pretty clearly; disquieting too to read about the bts shoots which give an #impression of an unsafe and exploitative film production which pressured the women in the cast into doing more nude work

Dec 27, 2022

Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter, 1984)

"You son of a bitch! I'm gonna give you something to remember us by."

#friday the 13th part 4 the final chapter #friday the 13th: the final chapter #jasoniad #blood tw #slasher film #joseph zito #barney cohen #harry manfredini #kimberly beck #corey feldman #peter barton #erich anderson #judie aronson #joan freeman #crispin glover #clyde hayes #barbara howard #lawrence monoson #camilla more #carey more #ted white #a fourth film in a horror franchise is a tough sell; often this is the point where everybody's really just phoning it in and you know it's #a soulless cash grab. imagine my pleasant surprise then when this turns out to rival parts 1 and 2 for sheer horror film making #excellence. plays with the setup in several delightful ways; adding a family unit makes for a nice change of pace and motivations #while having a character who's not only aware of Jason and his methods but is actively hunting him is a stroke of brilliance (even if he #ends up doing a really shitty job). future big names Feldman and Glover add a touch of class as well as interesting new points of view #(Feldman the first actual child to be involved in the series) and the story is still discernable from its origins in part 1 to where we are #now (altho Jason has morphed somewhat to become something evidently more than human). actually a pretty great film!#plus there's a dog! and I choose to believe he survived being thrown from a window bc that's how i roll

Jan 23, 2023

Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan (1989)

"Look, you don't understand, there is a maniac trying to kill us!"

"Welcome to New York."

#Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan #jason takes manhattan #jasoniad #1989 #slasher film #rob hedden #jensen daggett #peter mark richman #barbara bingham #scott reeves #vincent craig dupree #sharlene martin #kelly hu #warren munson #tiffany paulsen #todd caldecott #kane hodder #gordon currie #saffron henderson #martin cummins #more accurately this should be titled Jason Takes a Boat (to Manhattan) bc most of the run time is spent on the weirdest ever high school #graduate's cruise to NY on a weird boat that has a gym‚ a sauna‚ a disco and pool room but still looks kind of like a large fishing vessel.#it's weird. but i had fun! this was a good one! goes weird and goofy but doesn't sacrifice the tension or the horror to do it. plus once #Jboy gets to the Big Apple it's kind of incredible (even if that is only the last 15 minutes). we also finally get some lore straightened #out about the boy's origins (8 movies in!!) and some creative and kooky kills. a fun time! ok it isn't on a par with 1 or 2 or 4 but for a #late stage sequel to a visibly tired franchise this is really pretty great. Hodder still the guy to beat as Jason (his bemused reaction to #seeing a gigantic picture of a hockey mask is kind of wonderful) and the disposable teens are pretty likable and fairly well drawn #also there's a badass dog that survives so jot that down slasher makers‚ it's always a winning idea #this is the end of my boxset so I'm gonna have to turn to more questionable sources for the next instalment #may take some time so no Jason for a while i expect

Dec 22, 2022

Friday the 13th: Part 2 (1981)

"What if there is a Jason?"

"Oh, bullshit, Ginny."

"No, what if there is some kind of boy-beast running around Camp Crystal Lake? I mean, let's try to think beyond the legend, put it in real terms. I mean, what would he be like today? Some kind of out of control psychopath?"

#friday the 13th part 2 #friday the 13th: part 2 #jasoniad #horror imagery tw #slasher film #1981 #steve miner #ron kurz #amy steel #john furey #adrienne king #kirsten baker #stuart charno #warrington gillette #walt gorney #marta kober #tom mcbride #bill randolph #lauren marie taylor #russell todd #betsy palmer #harry manfredini #ohh delicious slasher heaven. that rarest of beasts‚ a horror sequel which not only matches its original but actually improves on it in #nearly every aspect; a beautifully shot film which absolutely nails the unbearable tension and momentous build up that's needed to make #this kind of film really work. Jason's here but not the pop culture figure with the hockey mask and the unkillable force; this is pure #backwoods terror as a crazed loner with a sack on his head goes absolutely ham among the campers that dare to disturb his lake home #begins with a just beautifully executed bit of business wrapping up the previous film‚ and pulls one of the greatest false ends out of the #book (Muffin?? Muffin the dog?? Muffin made it???) and all looking and sounding about as great as slasher films ever did #Manfredini once again knocks it out of the park with his incredible score. i can't honestly believe that any of the sequels will live up to #this. slasher cinema as it is meant to be‚ or as it should be if everything just.. clicks

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