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no one:

like absolutely nobody:

not a single soul:

me: ...s-should... i; write a jawha au..

#hailey.txt #jawha #like—#i miss them uh #but also: i have not updated any aus... in so long

“Last Words„

JaWha oneshot - Unrelated to canon

Angst

Masterlist

—

Junghwa and Jacob had started dating when he was 16, it had ended when he had just reached 19. Honestly, it took him a while to get back into a routine without the other boy, to learn to sleep alone, to live alone.

The breakup had absolutely shattered him, to find Jacob with another man in their home, to find that the one week he was gone for school his boyfriend of three years had taken another man into their place, to their bed.

He had moved out of the apartment by the end of the month.

Now, a year later, he was face to face with Jacob outside the cafe they had their first date of all places and his chest felt like it was burning, like he was drowning and he couldn’t get enough air because he was right there and he was real.

With a clear of his throat, and crossing his arms for something to do with his hands Junghwa nods tensely at him, “Jacob.”

His name leaves his mouth with a bitter taste, and he’s surprised he could force the word out with how cinstricted it feels.

“Junghwa.” He smiles weakly, “How are you?”

“Better.” Junghwa responded with a deadpan expression, forcing the uneasiness if seeing him to the back of his mind. “You?”

“Alright.”

The silence is tense, and Junghwa could feel his hands trembling.

Clearing his throat again, Junghwa nods at him one last time to continue on his way, “Well, I’ll be going.”

His turn was stopped by Jacob’s hand on his wrist, and Junghwa eyes his hand with obvious distaste at being touched by him after so long. Because the feeling of fire was still there, the same one that was there when he would caress his face while he kissed him, the one he felt when he trailed his hands down his spine and over his chest while they spoke.

It reminded him of what they weren’t.

“Please know that I do regret it.”

That wasn’t what he was expecting, but the shock didn’t last nearly as long as the anger, “Oh really? Because it didn’t seem like it when you were fucking some stranger in our apartment.” He spat, wrenching his wrist from his grip.

“I regret it all. I really do, I promise. Please, please– let’s fix this, please.” Jacob pleads with him, and Junghwa scoffs

He turned his whole body back to him with the most intense glare he’d ever given, “Remember when you promised we’d always be together? Because I remember when I thought you meant it.”

“Don’t you think you can fall back in love with me?” And they both knew that sentence wasn’t true but Jacob was so tired and missed the other more than life itself, if arguing was the only way to get him to stay for a minute longer, he would.

The relationship was too broken to fix anyways, what did he have to lose?

Junghwa ignored the way the pain in Jacobs face just broke him more then anything, but he was too angry to stop now, “I can’t fall in love with you. I don’t want all the pain that comes with it!” He throws his hands in the air, “Just move on!”

And Jacob can’t stop his mouth before the words slip from his lips, “I can’t move on from something that wasn’t supposed to end!” He shouts, and he can finally feel the tears filling his eyes, “I was so in love with you! I was so in love with you and I was so afraid of losing you to someone better, that- that you’d realize how much of a mess I am and leave—“

“WELL I LIVED IT!” Junghwa shouted back, and he was thankful the dark street was empty as they both screamed at eachother, “YOU IMAGINED SUCH TERRIBLE SITUATIONS FOR YOURSELF AND I WAS THE ONE TO COME HOME TO IT!”

Silence.

The two sit there breathing heavily through suppressed tears in the middle of the street at what could only be somewhere between midnight and three A.M. but Junghwa wasn’t sure anymore.

“I’m going to ask you one thing, Jacob.” Junghwa choked out hoarsely, “Are you satisfied with the mess you’ve created out of me?”

And Jacob could only shake his head in silent tears, managing a few hoarse words of his own, “I’m so, so sorry.”

Those were the last words Junghwa ever heard from him, because they never spoke again.

#JaWha #I; ha t e myself #angst #its just angst #thats a l l it js #JaWha angst #junghwa x jacob #jacob x junghwa #oneshot #jawha oneshot #oc couple #not back from hiatus but take this