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Breaking Down the Amanda/Declan Scene (23x10) - Part 2

Part 1 here.

Now that we’ve established Amanda is the best mom and Declan not being there was what was best for Jesse, let’s get to the part I have mixed feelings about.

My expectations for them even addressing this were super low, so I was so glad to hear him even saying this out loud. It was inappropriate and he shouldn’t have done it. He absolutely knew better.

I didn’t like that they had her cut him off; he should’ve fully apologized for it and she should have accepted.

But, the way Kelli played it made me think that she’s come across this idea before (i.e. probably from Hanover) and doesn’t want to hear it from him too (even though she should). Amanda does absolutely hate being coddled and the way she says “I’m an adult” makes me think she feels like he’s infantilizing her ability to make decisions, which is why I think she brushed it off so quickly. Amanda had enough trouble accepting what Patton did to her; I think dealing with the tricky issue of what happened with Declan would be even harder because to her, it probably feels even grayer. Yes, she’s an SVU detective, but as we saw with Liv, it’s really hard to accept that something that happened to you personally that you thought was completely consensual might not have been.

Still would’ve liked to see her let him apologize and acknowledge it was wrong, though, but it does make sense for the character that she didn’t.

Really glad they had Murphy acknowledge he was the one who left, because saying you’ll support someone and then jetting off back to deep undercover in Serbia is the same as abandoning them.

If he wanted to actually be a father, he could’ve made better choices (why I’m thankful for the use of the word “mistake”). But he didn’t.

Again, just an appreciation of Kelli’s face acting here. You can see it in her eyes just how much Amanda wanted to hear something like that for a very long time.

Remember that she was practically alone in New York (she and Liv weren’t close yet, Nick left, she barely knew Sonny), pregnant for the first time, and her first choice for a support system (her mom) completely collapsed.

She grew up seeing her mom chase after men who were bad for her and Amanda talks about wanting to do the exact opposite of her mother, so she was never going to ask Declan for help even if she needed it, especially after he just got right back on the plane after she told him she was pregnant with his baby.

So for him to come back and say that probably means a lot to her—a man who treated her very wrongly actually acknowledging that he did (instead of lying, gaslighting, denying, etc.)—even if it’s far too late for it to mean anything for Jesse.

Her saying “it took me some time to figure out how to think about it” also makes me think that she probably did process the fact that he did abandon her and Jesse (again, hopefully in therapy with Hanover) and that this conversation isn’t coming after years of completely denying what happened between them.

And now, for the best moment of the whole episode:

When Amanda was with Bucci, she talked about how terrified she was that her girls would grow up thinking they don’t deserve to be happy.

Having her acknowledge not only that Jesse is happy, but that Amanda is happy too (and therefore Jesse is seeing that she deserves to grow up and be happy) is so, so important and speaks to just how far Amanda has come on her own.

A huge part of that, obviously, is her relationship with Dominick and how it’s developed over time, but even wouldn’t be possible without her accepting that she can choose happiness and be in a relationship.

I’m glad this ended mostly here (Declan is one of the last people who deserves to know if she’s in a relationship, so I didn’t really appreciate him asking the question) and there was no offer of him seeing Jesse, because at this point, he doesn’t deserve to, and the way he was talking makes me think he understands that.

As much as I love Sonny, I’m glad he wasn’t there for this conversation, because Amanda deserved to have it with Declan alone.

The biggest change I would make to the episode is having a scene where Amanda goes home to Jesse (especially bc we got a Noah scene), because it would just reinforce how strong their bond is.

In conclusion:

1. Amanda Rollins is the best mom, and she’s been doing it almost completely by herself the whole time.

2. Jesse doesn’t ever need to be around Declan (please for the love of God, take Murphy out of her name in the credits).

3. Jesse does have a dad who’s been there for her since she was born, and his name is Dominick “Sonny” Carisi Jr.

#law and order svu #svu #Amanda Rollins #Kelli Giddish #Declan Murphy #Donal Logue #Sonny Carisi #dominick carisi #Jesse Rollins #rollisi #bc i mention them in this one #23x10 #silent night hateful night #scene analysis #jenna posts