#jest rambles

[piercingclowns]

awesome minecraft video ft me my boyfriend (twirps minecraft) and some friends (zero from the ruin) (gokucopter from the ruin) (arch and mari from tumblr)

go watch!!!

[dilucsgreatsword]

I've been playing through Nier: Automata lately and really enjoying it. Never played anything from Yoko Taro before, but I have a lot of friends into Nier & also just have always heard good things about it, so it's always intrigued me. I've owned it for something like a year or two now, but only just got to actually playing it...

With that being said, I beat Route A/completed ending A last night and I have a lot of thoughts. Overall have really enjoyed my time with Nier. My first playthrough before hitting ending A was 22 hours and it felt unbelievably short. When I started approaching what felt like the end, I'd get sad and started hoping & praying there was still more than I thought because I didn't want my time with it to be over. I think it might be my GOTY so far...? The jury's still out, depends on how much more is left and what comes of it, but I'm really excited to find out all of these things.

Spoilers (?) under the read more as I get into more of my thoughts thus far.

I heard a lot of praise from people about how this game changed their life; and while I can see how, it didn't quite do that for me. Of course, I'm not finished, but I was expecting... more? I don't know. I'm not underwhelmed with this game. There was never a point where the game felt like a slog. There is so much to do, even though the world is honestly small. I have my issues with the map (I get why it's like that but... man it's annoying sometimes), but even that feels like a nitpick when traversing is just fun. The save stations were cool, and the fast travel was convenient of course but sometimes I still opted to just walk and run for the sake of taking in the environment.

Nier has a lot to say about humanity. about love. about what makes us who we are. I read a review from a friend on backloggd before I played where they mentioned that Nier might have their favorite side quests of any game ever—which felt like a high bar. I mean, really. Ever? After playing, I get it now.

I don't think that anything Nier says is revolutionary, per se, but I think that the tact and sensitivity in which it explores love and humanity and identity are so tender and beautiful that I really do get it.

[Journal 030] Rain is falling. A bird stopped on my shoulder. I never tire of looking at life on this planet. I will make my record of this bird protected data so I do not lose it.

There were quite a few side quests that left an impact and I don't want to even begin talking about them in fear someone will have this experience ruined for them even just a bit. I never cried or got overly emotional, but that doesn't mean I felt nothing. It's hard to put into words. Like a warm cup of broth when you're sick. A fresh blanket out of the dryer during the winter season. Being held by your lover on a quiet evening.

The main story is quite good too. Ironically, I have less to say here. It was good. I liked it. I'd almost say I loved it, but I can't. The copied city, 9S, 2B, and everything with regards to the last... two? three? hours was the highlight. And I mean, for anyone who's played, is that really a surprise? 2B's development over time was guy wrenching. To watch her come out of this shell, accept her own humanity as an individual because of her love for 9S even after spending the entirety of the campaign arguing that machines are just that—machines.

9S' crucifixion was really visually striking, and not just for the very literal imagery. Im having a difficult time describing what it was about it that left such an impression, but I think it was just the matter that I didn't expect it. The journey to finding 9S once again, expecting him to be well and chipper after his sacrifice, if not just his corpse and black box. I didn't expect to see him strung up and... martyred? By another machine driving home a point. In that moment, when 2B loses her cool and finds herself, I felt what she did. It resonated deeply. Of course, this extends to the final fight. The fight itself? Awesome as fuck. So hype and so fun, but its the ending itself, with 9S' resurrection as a machine, saved by the corruption that takes him from 2B in the first place, is so... aughhh man. It's hard to put into words.

I beat route A and I desperately want there to be more. Like I said, I've started route B (presumably, at least) in which you pilot 9S instead. It's been fun. I'm only a few hours in (two, i think) and I'm having fun. The hacking mechanic is really cool, and I'm excited to potentially revisit quests I missed the first time. Of course, it seems this time will be a lot shorter. There are less markers, and I feel railroaded into the main story, just from the perspective of another character which is... I mean I'm not unhappy with it? 9S is so likeable, and his commentary is so fun, but I hope there's more substance than just a perspective shift. Maybe that's selfish but I want more Nier, not to just re-experience what I played a few hours ago.

I will return with more thoughts in a reblog when I finish route B, and then again when I play route C. I'm hopeful, and excited, and if this really is where the new content ends, I'm still okay with it because I really enjoyed my time with it and the feelings it gave me.

[jescache]

hey dudes, before the last TMA episode drops today i just really wanna thank every single one of the people in this fandom. 

TMA means so much to me as it was the really the first media I consumed that had active representation of who I was? and like the fan-artists y’all did a wonderful job of drawing and displaying these wonderful identities and I cant thank you enough for that! I don't really actively participate in the fandom apart from a couple posts and shit but like everyone is so nice and I really would like to thank y’all for creating such a welcoming community for everyone, and being like a small group where we could laugh and cry and yell about stuff even if we never talked one on one or directly. A place where you could just feel a sense of togetherness every time an episode came out. Ill never forget the sense of belonging you guys gave to me in one of the most isolated times in my life.

Thanks y’all and for the last time

The magnus archives sure is a podcast :)

[jestdrabbles]

I’m so here for Dabi finally exposing Endeavor, but I’m also so worried this is just going to amount to the public still blindly believing in heroes anyway. Reason being that it seems like the narrative’s gone out of its way this chapter to “disprove” two of Dabi’s claims: one, that Rei was forced to bear each child, and two, that Hawks killed Best Jeanist.

Recalling the timeline, it’s barely been a year since Endeavor started behaving. And while yes, that change is good, him continuing to work as a hero is not, and if he truly felt remorse for what he’d done, he would’ve come clean himself and stepped down. I don’t care how good at his job he is, if his abuse led to his child’s death, a hospitalized wife, and severely traumatized children, he has no business being a symbol that protects anyone.

Also I’m really hating this internal Endeavor narrative because he’s acting like he cared immensely the whole time, and that just doesn’t track with how he acted or spoke up until recently. He has a conscience now, I guess, but he didn’t for the vast majority of their lives. It’s frustrating to think that Shouto’s going to have to defend him or something, and I’m tired of him having to be put in these positions when he should have been allowed to leave Endeavor behind him.

[piercingclowns]

i make so much stuff and i have to hoard all of it because if i dont it gets exposed to everyone who changes its intent by virtue of looking at it and it makes me angry and mad and upset so i just draw yaoi for myself now and its kind of freeing in the same way that being a hermit and living alone on a mountain is freeing

[piercingclowns]

i was on the derapchu irl stream today if you saw me can you tell me how auraful i was thanks

[dilucsgreatsword]

im gonna be so honest, im having some mean thoughts about silksong...

there's nuance in that the game is difficult and at a level i really love, while also featuring incredibly overtuned enemy design and in many cases artificial difficulty by the double damage that only makes the experience feel way worse. dying because you've gotten hit by an enemy with the ability to dash, parry, throw projectiles, and stun you in the center of the screen while also dealing double damage !!!! feels kind of lame...?

a large majority of the bosses are so well designed, with movesets that feel like enough of a challenge for anyone who is and isn't already intimately familiar with hollow knight, so i don't see the necessity of having all of their attacks do double damage. i guess you could call it a skill issue, but i've been progressing rather quickly when compared to my peers (i've unlocked six(?) areas thus far and beaten a handful of bosses) without much issue. its just really tedious how much damage you take from common enemies that are, at times, incredibly irritating to avoid as well as the hazards. i feel like i'm somewhere close to the 1/3 or even 1/2 point, and my health is still insanely limited, making every hit of damage incredibly punishing. i understand they wanted the spike in difficulty, but at some point it feels like less of a challenge and more like tedium to play. which really is unfortunate because i LIKE silksong! hornet's moveset has been really fun to learn and the areas have all been incredibly unique and beautiful. the atmospheric music and all of the lovely npcs are very pleasant.

team cherry has captured what made hollow knight so fulfilling to explore, but also man! this difficulty spike happened in the wrong places. i genuinely think if they didn't have the 2x mask damage, this game would feel perfect. i haven't had issues with benches or exploration or anything really, but the increased damage with such low hp for SO long has felt exhausting. especially when my moves feel so limited as well its ... AUGH. i am enjoying this game. i am! i swear. still....

[piercingclowns]

i think my biggest problem with the common team pe characterization is people make pentar so devoted to cor which. he Is but only because its in his best interest to. i think it morphs into a little bit of genuine care over time but there's also this underlying feeling of "i dont need him" and "i am better than him" that is important to who pentar thinks he is within their dynamic