#jilly spam

[faejilly]

you know, I've seen a lot of people talking about fandom as community rather than commodity lately (and they've mostly all been good thought out takes, my corner of tumblr is very nice)

and I think a lot of it comes down to the fact that people have forgotten how to just, make small talk

we're hanging out at the same fandom party, and maybe I know you well enough to wave at or maybe I don't, but I'm all standing awkwardly with my drink because the cat disappeared so I have to try and people, and I go "hey, I think this blorbo's neat" for something to say, and you can go "yeah, me too" or "I don't know, I like her brother better" and then I can go, "oh really, tell me more" or maybe "oh, what do you think of their Mom?" and maybe all we'll do is fill some time until someone else joins in with a "hey did you see that new gifset someone made?" or maybe we'll get really invested in comparing thoughts about blorbo's Mom and we'll keep talking until the party winds down and everyone gets kicked out and keels over to get some sleep.

And maybe we'll never do more than wave in passing again, or maybe we'll both remember that one conversation and one of us will reach out with another thought and someone will share an idea for a fic or a sketch or whatever

and now we're friendly and can chat when we run into each other at the metaphorical bus stop and if that's it THAT'S FINE, it's nice to have someone to chat with when you're waiting

or maybe we decide to meet up for lunch and become brickspace friends, or maybe we realize we actually can't stand each other if it's not just about blorbo and her Mom so we'll just yell meta at each other occasionally

and all of that is FINE AND NICE AND GOOD FOR BOTH US AND OUR FANDOM COMMUNITY

but someone did in fact have to make small talk first

[faejilly]

used book store day!

and holy shit, modern books have such boring covers in comparison. look at these glorious technicolors

[faejilly]

man

I've been feeling like shit all week

and my manager is very good at pushing my buttons (via her all-encompassing lack of managerial aptitude imo)

so I just quit effective immediately

over *text*

which is a thing I have never ever done in my entire life and do in fact feel kind of ashamed about

but also fuck them, because their unreasonable expectations and inability to maintain sustainable staffing levels are not my fault, so whatever I guess?

[faejilly]

in the process of looking up my stats for that poll

I realized I have only made like five posts in the last month and a half? LIKE LOOK AT THIS PLUMMETING DESCENT

no wonder I feel like I don't talk to people, I stopped talking on tumblr and never replaced it with anything else (the one month I had this url in 2012 looks like not much less than the entirety of 2025? tbf 2025 was a shit show but still)

some of that is of course that tumblr has quieted down a fair bit, but I don't want to be part of the problem!

also where the fuck is everyone? I find discord only marginally tolerable since it's too isolating by design, all those separated rooms that don't even have windows, but I do miss harmless chatting which is hard to do here

/tbf to discord, I do also miss the times I've managed to be comfortable in a server and just hung out in a voice room or call and maybe shared a game screen or listened to music and people could drop in and out as they were around, that was a nice low-key option, but most of them aren't that casual

(I miss forums? public enough they didn't get as spirally as discord, you could lurk when you were feeling antisocial, etc.)

idk what I'm saying. I have forgotten how to people and I'm not sure how to start again

[faejilly]

I have written like three different posts the last couple days that I keep discarding instead of saving when I get interrupted

I am clearly still terrible at being social, even on tumblr 😅

[faejilly]

@lynne-monstr and I were talking (in the post replies) about making a virtual craft night since we can't all go hang out in a physical room somewhere with our separate projects...

and now after complaining about how there's no good public spaces to counter the weird segregated world of disparate discord servers in fandom & online in general...

I'm thinking a discord server would be the easiest way to make a virtual craft night that would be reasonably autonomous for continuing regardless of how consistent people's schedules are?

Unless someone has a better suggestion?

[faejilly]

y'all

I think I finished writing a fic

I now need to work up the nerve to find a beta because it's been so long I absolutely cannot trust my own proofreading skills but hey

I MAYBE WROTE A THING!?!

[faejilly]

it's fun, as an adult, to suddenly realize you do actually have useful car insurance and you call them. and realize the past two days would have been a lot easier if you'd called them first but you're so used to annoying medical insurance you didn't even think of it 'til the repair people told you it'd be a week until your part came in and you suddenly remembered you have rental coverage